📚 for-the-birds Part 1 of 1
Part 1
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LOVING WIVES

For The Birds 1

For The Birds 1

by nsitcr
4 min read
4.04 (14700 views)
adultfiction

I saw my second off to college. Much like the first, it was all I could do to hold back my tears. This one was deeper since both had now flown the nest, and I was officially alone.

That wasn't the plan. Their father was supposed to be with me, pretending to be strong for all of us, but really doing his best to hold himself together. Afterward, we might find ourselves at a motel, or a byway, and we'd find comfort in each other. In other words, we'd fuck like animals.

I managed to pull myself together--with some helpful horn suggestions from those behind me--and pulled away.

Driving home, I thought back to when it had all gone sideways.

When the girls were early teenagers, our family dog had crossed the rainbow bridge. This, of course, was a

disaster

, and I went out in search of a new furry family member.

I went to the shelter, but none were right. I went to the local pet store. Still looking for the perfect, loyal family dog, I trod through the kennels, but none appealed. Nor did the cats.

I found myself in the exotic pet area. Snakes, tarantulas, monkeys--I couldn't see trying to take care of one of these. Then I passed the bird area. Aha, I thought. Birds are easy and cute.

I was looking at a particularly colorful parrot when a worker happened in.

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"You seem awfully interested in Polly."

"She's a beautiful bird."

"You'd think so, but she's been brought back several times."

Polly chimed in: "Rawk! New girl! New girl!"

Maybe the previous adopters just couldn't handle a bird. How hard could it be? Besides, Polly was really pretty. Lovely plumage even if she wasn't a Norwegian Blue. I settled up with the store and took Miss Polly home.

I set Polly's cage in the living room. I was curious what the family would think. This wouldn't be what anyone had in mind when I volunteered to find a new family pet.

While waiting for everyone to come home, I decided to research parrot care. The upshot: clean birds overall, not given to excreting inappropriately. Playful, but prone to jealousy, usually expressed by biting. Depending on age, they could be retrained to learn new words. Simple diet, plus toys to keep the beak sharp.

I was concentrating when Polly squawked: "Rawk! New house! New madam! New house! New madam!"

Madam? Was this bird unusually polite?

The girls came home. As usual, they dropped their gear just inside the door. They can't take care of their own business, never mind a pet.

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After they changed out of their school clothes, the girls wandered back in. Polly saw them: "Rawk! New house! New madam! New house!"

That got their attention. I had to explain that I was unable to find a more conventional furry animal, but didn't Polly have lovely plumage? Besides, a parrot was easy to take care of.

"Rawk! New madam! New girls! New girls!"

I was starting to wonder. I called the store, when I got the true story. Turns out the damn bird had been raised in a whorehouse. I could only imagine the depths of filth this bird might dredge up.

I wanted to return the bird but the pet store, tired of Polly being returned, had offered me a deal: half price for the bird, and they threw in the cage and free food for six months, in exchange for which I was never to return the bird.

Worse, my soft heart meant I couldn't just toss Polly outside. I'd just have to work on teaching her different words.

The girls and I ate dinner. Their father was working late again, which was fine; I was a bit worried about how to explain that I had brought home a feathered versus furred companion.

I was dozing on the sofa when I heard him walk into the house.

"Rawk! Welcome back, Keith! New girls! New madam! New girls! Hot girls! Don't forget your discount!"

No wonder we never got ahead despite all the extra hours Keith was "working".

I managed to win the house and primary custody of the girls. Luckily, I tested clean, though I was on tenterhooks for some time. Keith stuck around until the final decree, then disappeared.

I haven't found a new man. With the girls at college, Polly has become my sole companion. Except now, she squawks out random Monty Python and Mel Brooks quotes.

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