Fixing a Marriage

*Hey guys, so this is a three to four part story that I've written. I'm dividing it only for the purpose of making it easier on the reader (I hope). I'll post the second part today itself.*

I was lying in bed staring at the ceiling and contemplating how my life had reached this point. The air conditioning made a nearly audible flow like sound and apart from that the room was pretty much silent. My wife was lying beside me facing the other side as well, she wasn't reacting to my gentle nudges to look at me. I guess I can't blame her, since I haven't been able to follow through on my promises for over three years now.

My name is sam and I met my current wife, Meghan 5 years ago. We met on twitter through our shared interest in pottery and developed a relation over the internet. When we finally met in real life after a year of messaging and talking, I was left quite dumbfounded at my luck in making such a beautiful goddess fall for me. She was 5" 5' with thick hips and an ample bosom (atleast a D cup). She had a gorgeous Mediterranean tan and had auburn hair flowing midway till her back. Those blue eyes and mischievous smile absolutely made me swoon. Although she was this good looking, I was immediately worried due to a harsh reality I face everyday. I was a 5" 7' white guy with an average build (not at all muscular) and my face was nothing special either. If someone asked you to spot me in a crowd for 10 bucks, you probably won't be getting that money.

But soon after that something special happened, it seems that Meghan had looked past my physical appearance and had fallen in love my personality (yes I'm a personality guy). She mentioned I was kind and funny and really cared for her and that was all that mattered. I was definitely lucky, but only for a second. The first time we had sex was beyond disappointing, I was not a virgin to be exact but my sexual experience only included barely putting my cock into a girl's pussy in college, it was extremely difficult and she had to guide me while she was drunk as well. I had started pumping pretty quickly and the girl just lay there without making any reactions. After a minute she yawned and told me to get off since she wasn't really feeling anything. This shocked me a bit and my cock went limp. She left after fixing her clothes and I was left with an insane mental trauma that lasted for 3 years which caused a fear of women in me. Meghan had cured this for me to a certain extent but the first time we had sex ended with the trauma rising up to the surface once again.

Meghan had worn extra sexy lingerie for me that night and I too had taken the proper steps to make sure I was at least a bit presentable. It started out good with giggles and lots of making out but the problem arose when we reached the penetration part. I was once again struggling to enter her and even Meghan was trying really hard to guide me. We tried to change positions and it kept on not working out. In the end I finally managed to get it in but I was getting kind of tired and my pace was a bit off. Meghan made a bit of a troubled face under me but smiled wryly when she saw that I noticed. I kept on going for another 3-4 minutes and was starting to pant and sweat profusely now. Meghan still looked a bit reactionless but she to was trying to make it good for me by kissing me and breathing in my ear occasionally. Once 5 minutes were up, I collapsed on her since I was dead tired. She asked me what happened and I told her that I couldn't go on anymore. She once again made a troubled expression. Maybe she was trying to brush off her feelings and try to make it work but she asked if she should finish me off with her mouth. I grew excited at this suggestion and agreed quickly. The only problem was that, unbeknownst to me, Meghan was really good at giving head (you can guess how she learned it). She made me cum in under a minute. After that she asked if I could do the same for her. This is where shit hit the fan. Apparently I was absolutely terrible with my tongue and just kept on messing up again and again. Meghan scowled with pain when I accidentally went too rough on a sensitive spot and I wasn't able to stimulate her clit properly for the life of me. This went on for 5-10 minutes and Meghan was getting visibly frustrated by now. She finally asked me to stop and gently told me with a kind smile that we can try again sometime. I was kind of hurt by this but I smiled and told her that I'll get better bit by bit.

This was three and a half years ago. Fast forward to today. I can penetrate easily without much struggle but the issue is that I've become a premature ejaculator over the last two years. I cum in under 2 minutes after penetration and today was the same. Meghan was visibly irritated since today was our third anniversary and I had promised her for the nth time that today will be different. Yet here we are. She made a slight sniffle without facing me. A box tissue were kept on the bedside table and Meghan grabbed those and left for the washroom. I was heartbroken. I loved my wife and she loved me. But the fact of the matter was that I could never satisfy her sexual needs. No matter how much effort I put in or she puts in, the result seems to be the same as always. I was frustrated beyond belief and my eyes started getting a bit watery. At this point, I had come to the conclusion that it would be better for the love of my life if she left me.

One day while I meghan was not home, I was going through some porn and found something quite interesting and new. It was a video where a guy was watching his wife getting fucked by this big black dude with a humongous cock while he jerked off. My first reaction was of course confusion. I immediately pitied the guy and thought to myself about who in their right mind would let another guy fuck their wife and jerk off watching that as well. But I did notice that the couple in the video were quite happy.

A bit of time passed and that video was not leaving my thoughts, I kept on thinking why such a thing existed and why these people were happy engaging in it. Being naturally curious was kind of my thing and I started looking into this stuff. It was apparently called as a cuckold lifestyle. The wife would be the hotwife, the guy fucking her would be the bull and the husband is the cuck. In my case, Meghan would be the hotwife and I would be the cuck. The exact moment I had this thought, a certain shiver ran down my spine. I was feeling a bit flushed and a bit excited, this reaction worried me a little bit. I was afraid whether or not I had an inclination towards being something I would rather not be. I stopped my thoughts midway and tried to keep myself busy off of these thoughts for the next few days. But as you may have expected it, these thoughts were apparently here to stay. They had taken residence in my mind and were not planning on leaving. Hence, I started my dive into the world of cuckolding.

I was immeresed in it after a time span of 3 months. I was reading up on fictional and real cuckold stories and at this point my cock couldn't get hard unless it was cuck porn. My thoughts were filled with self depreciation and guessing if which ever guy I met had a bigger cock than me. Even meghan was not exempt from my perversion. Almost two weeks ago, I had finally started thinking of her getting fucked by other men. Most of the time it was this popular guy at work, my old yet good looking boss or the handsome young guy working at the cafe that me and meghan frequently visit. Sometimes I imagined all three of them gangbanging her while they all humiliated me and I would absolutely erupt from the pleasure. I was perfectly aware of how twisted I had become but I also knew that there was no stopping this.

One day, I finally gathered the courage and asked Meghan if she ever imagine sleeping with other guys besides me. I had asked her this once in our first year of marriage when I was in a bad spot and she had immediately scolded me and reassured me strongly that she only had eyes for me. But this time, the reaction was a bit different. She obviously said that she wouldn't do it, but there was a pause before she replied, almost like she wanted to reply yes. My guess was correct, Meghan wasn't completely against the idea like last time and I don't blame her really, the poor girl has a husband like me. It would be arrogant of me to keep her to myself. Thus I decided that I will be helping my wife sleep with other men.