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Frank Beard; Billy Gibbons; Dusty Hill: "I got a girl, she lives on the hill. She won't do it but her sister will, when she boogie, she do the tube snake boogie."
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I've always thought that I had a good sense of right and wrong. That doesn't mean that I haven't done a few mean things in my life. One of the cruelest things I ever saw, made me do one of the cruelest things I ever did. I was popular in high school, but not ready for a 'steady'. There was a group of girls, the in-crowd, who could best be stereotyped as a mutual admiration society.
One of my best friends has a sister, Linda, who was trying hard to get into that inner circle. I was a senior and she was a junior. Every day I'd watch Linda trying to be 'cool enough' to be accepted. One day it appeared to work. Linda was beaming, but it didn't last. The group had schemed to have a boy embarrass the shit out of Linda. They were so proud of themselves. It made me sick.
As prom approached, I asked Linda to go with me, but only if she kept it quiet and explained to her my reasons. I then asked the alpha girl of the cool kids group, Stacy Gibson, to prom. She was a pretentious know-it-all. Since she had recently broken up with boyfriend number ten thousand, she was thrilled to have been asked. Stacy was too ill to attend prom as a junior, and now, being a senior, it would have been beneath her to have to ask someone to take her. Prom would not be something Stacy ever got to experience.
The night of prom, Linda and I had a great time. No, we didn't have sex in the back of my car, as I wouldn't do that to my best friend. When Stacy did show up, security had to call the police. She was suspended for two weeks and lost a scholarship because of that. Even her last ex-boyfriend came to her defense. Oops, my bad, I forgot. Stacy was also expelled from the cool kids group. I made a point to lecture Linda about being herself and having her own set of morals. Have people like you because of who you are, not who you hang around with. I live by that code myself.
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I met Rachel at a freshman social held by a fraternity. She was being recruited to join a sorority, while I was being pressured to join this fraternity. Having been raised in the country, my social skills hadn't been refined to the collegiate level. We raised cattle and farmed enough alfalfa to feed them. Why is that important? My after school agenda had me doing chores at home. I'd never seen a live completely naked girl, although Jeanie took my virginity bent over with her skirt raised and sky blue thong pushed aside. At this party, there were several naked women and men and WOW, the things they were doing. I've always felt that I had a good moral compass, and this seemed wrong. Talk about an eye opener.
Although invited to join in, I declined and made myself scarce. I was in a daze as I started walking back to my dorm.
"Hey, wait up!" slowed me down.
The young lady catching up to me was Rachel.
"Too wild for you too?"
"If the truth be known, yeah. I'm Kyle, and you are beautiful."
"I'm Rachel, and you're full of shit."
To say we clicked is an understatement. By the end of our freshman year, we were engaged. No date had been set, but we knew it would happen. Rachel was taking the necessary classes needed to become an elementary school teacher. I was hoping to land a job in accounting.
A few weeks into our courtship, I learned that Rachel had an identical twin, Rebecca. Rebecca decided she wanted to separate their lives, and chose a different university. Rachel talked with her at least twice a week.
In the summer after our junior year, Rachel and I married. Our final year of schooling flew by. Finishing college in four years was a feat in itself. After all three of us graduated, Rebecca became Mrs. Gary Sawyer.
It took a little luck to find jobs in the same city, for both Rachel and myself. The employment gods were smiling on us. Not only did we find jobs, they were near the city where Rebecca and Gary lived.
Now, Rachel and Rebecca could not only talk a few times a week, we were getting together with them about once a month. It really is remarkable how they look, sound, and move the same way. Gary and I get along great. Although Rachel and I don't do the recreational drugs, I tag along with Gary when he goes to the pot shops. There's a whole subculture surrounding pot that I never really knew existed.
Rebecca flirts, a lot. Rachel teases me "Remember, she's the one wearing a pink blouse. Rebecca loves pink, and I don't. You better not forget that buster!"
Both Rachel and Rebecca are intelligent and confident. They can do point counter point debates with gusto.
It was mid-May, a month shy of Rebecca's first wedding anniversary, when her world came crashing down. The doctor's still aren't sure why, but one morning Rebecca awoke and didn't know who she was or where she was. Gary denied that they'd abused recreational drugs. I have my doubts as Rachel said that Rebecca and Gary had tried Psilocybe mushrooms, which cause hallucinations.
After a week of observation, Rebecca was transferred to Pleasant Memories, a mental institution. Rachel took it hard. Her best friend and lifelong support line, was gone, not physically, but mentally.
Near the end of summer, Gary filed for divorce and moved away. Rebecca's condition wasn't complete amnesia. She remembers lots of things, but most days just not who she is or where she is.
If there is a pattern, I think it's that Rebecca will assume the identity of whoever she dreamt about the night before. She can be a newscaster, a politician, or even Rachel or their mother, Mary. On occasion she'll even assume the identity of her doctor or nurse. You just never know what to expect when you visit her. There's been a few times she's actually been Rebecca.
Mary is divorced, and when Rachel became pregnant, she relocated to be near not only Rachel and her grandchildren, but also Rebecca. She has a boyfriend, Ray or Ron or Rob or whatever. They don't last long. Mary goes through them about one or two a year.
Thankfully, in our country, being confined to a mental institution is covered by national health care. There's no way Rebecca or her mother could absorb the cost of the care that Rebecca is receiving.
Every other month or so, Rachel and I will check Rebecca out and take her to the zoo or an amusement park. Mary checked her out a few times, but quit when Rebecca escaped. Rebecca went missing for two days before the police found her. It devastated Mary. When we are out and about, Rebecca still exudes sexuality and we have to watch the horndogs trying to lure her away from us. On more than one occasion, Rachel has scolded Rebecca about inappropriately groping me. I get away with it by saying 'Oh, that wasn't you? She's not wearing pink.'
The institution has Rebecca on birth control. In my mind, it's to protect them from lawsuits if one of their patients gets pregnant by the staff. Of course their position is that they can't control what their occupants do, as long as it is consensual. Watching some of the male staff leer at the women creeps me out.
Even though it was Rebecca institutionalized, Rachel gradually changed, and not for the better. The sniping and sometimes outright disdain towards me was very new in our relationship.
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Rachel and I have been married for six years now. Daniel, our oldest, just turned four and David celebrated his second a month before that. I have to admit that raising boys is not for the squeamish. They have a ton of energy and a knack for pushing things to the limit. Don't get me wrong, I love them to death.
It was a Thursday, which was also day two of my three day seminar. Before heading out to dinner I called Rachel to see how things were at home.
She greeted me "Hey babe, how was your day today?"
"Very good, lots of good discussions back and forth. Anything newsy at home?"
"No, just finished feeding the boys. They're parked in front of the television watching their favorite movie. Headed to dinner?"
"After we hang up. Tomorrow, I should be on the flight that leaves at three. That should get me home by seven. Give the boys a hug and a kiss from me."
"And none for me? Excuse me!"
"I was getting to that. For you, a really naughty hug and lots of kisses, especially you know where."
