This is a simple little story of selfishness, anger, pride and love. No sex in this one.
*
I'm not an eavesdropper but when my ears start burning, I usually try to find out what's going on. Problem was, at times...I wish I hadn't.
It was late and I just got home from my shift. I was a thirty-two year on the job cop getting ready to retire as a patrol sergeant. Now, I was kinda getting excited about retiring; however, my wife, Robyn, didn't seem so keen on the idea. I think she wasn't too sure about having me around underfoot all the time.
We had been married going on thirty-one years. I was fifty-three and she was a beautiful fifty-two. For the past thirty years, Robyn has had to live the life of a cops wife subjected to shift work; such as, weekends, graveyards and/or swings, overtime, special duties, training days, travel...it all had to fit in to our marriage. Then, there was the constant worry that something would happen to me, you know, the inherent dangers that come with police work. And it didn't help any that she was a nurse working at one of the local hospitals.
Then the kids, let's not forget about the kids. First Janey and then little David named after my brother. God, we loved them both, but...they did take a toll on the more intimate part of our life together. However, we managed to make it all work. Now, the kids are grown and have families of their own. David was a three year vet at one of the larger Orange County city police departments, his wife also a nurse. Hmmm, see a pattern there?
I had only three more weeks until I was done with the badge. Oh, I would still be able to carry a gun concealed—us retired cops can do that as long as we qualify, but I would no longer have to slap on the uniform and crawl into a black and white for ten to twelve hours dealing with the crooks, addicts, gangbangers and drunks...and the ever-complaining, un-appreciative public.
As I pulled up to the house, I smiled when I noticed my sister-in-law's car in the driveway blocking the garage. I always like Trisha. Born with a bubbling personality, she was also one fine woman, almost as sexy as my wife. Both had similar great figures but where Trisha had dark hair, Robyn had lustrous auburn curls. The two of them shared the same emerald green eyes. If there was a fault to be found, it would be Paul, Trisha's lame excuse of a husband. They were going through a rough time of it and their marriage may not survive.
Parking next to her car, I walked around the side to enter through the back door. I never liked walking in through the front door after getting off work, kind of a weird habit I developed. When I entered the backyard and strolled to the door, I saw the dining room light was on. The dining room window was open and I could hear the soft sexy voices of Robyn and Trisha, my sis-in-law, gabbing away. Hey I thought, this should be interesting and, after all, my ears were on fire. As I moved closer, I overheard them engaged in a heated argument.
"You are fucking crazy, sis! If you do this, you might lose everything you love. You may lose Grant. Hell, if he ever finds out...you will lose him."
I could hear Trisha admonish my wife. Lose me? Oh fuck, this does not sound good. What the hell is Robyn up to now? Oh, by the way...I am Grant, Grant William Dawson.
"I won't lose anything and Grant loves me too much to ever leave me for just a little fling."
My wife, Robyn, said this aggressively, but, didn't sound convincing...at least to me. And, Robyn doesn't know me as well as she thinks. If she were to do something stupid, like cheat on me, she would be very surprised what I would do.
"Besides Trish, it will be just the one time. I've got to do this. Shit, I'm in my fifties and not getting any younger. I need to know, before my time is up, if a man would still desire me."
I heard Trisha snort and say, "Robyn, you are a beautiful woman and Grant is a very handsome man. You are fifty-two and he is fifty-three and you both turn heads whenever you walk into a room. Crap, if I wasn't trying to fix my fucked up marriage, I'd jump at the chance for a man like Grant and I'm fifteen years younger that you. Believe me, if you do this and Grant finds out...and he will...then there will be some extremely happy women out there. Because dear sister, Grant won't put up with your shit. I'm telling you Robyn, you do this, he's history."
Hell, this is sounding bad. Would Robyn cheat on me? Has she already fucked another man? Who? I have felt these sensations before, at work. Starts with a coldness, a fear running through you but then begins to evolve into heat, a burning anger that threatens to fly into a rage if you don't get a handle on your emotions. Above all else, I had to keep a tight control on my temper or else people I love would get hurt.
As I hid by the window, I heard Trisha continue, "Listen, if Grant finds out about this guy you work with...Jubal isn't it? And, well...I wouldn't want to be in his shoes. You know Grant's temper. Have you done it with him yet?"
Jubal? I've heard that name a few times, even met the guy once. He's one of those ER doctors at the same hospital my wife works. Robyn is a registered nurse and has been with Mercy for nearly twenty-five years. This Jubal character showed up about six months ago. The guy comes across as a typical hustler, always playing to the skirts. He probably does pretty well for himself. Oh, he's a looker at a couple of inches past six foot with blue eyes and wavy dark hair and maybe in his late thirties to early forties. Had that easy smile that made me wanta rip off his head. I met him at the hospital awards banquet and was irritated the way he was always hovering around my wife. After the party while on the way home, I mentioned this little observation to Robyn and she just laughed it off. When I pressed the issue, she became angry and wouldn't speak to me for the rest of the night. Pissed me off because I was hoping for a little loving later that night. I might as well have kissed a bottle of liquid nitrogen...would have been warmer than the attitude she gave me.
I heard my wife sigh before she said, "No, not yet. We've necked in his car and I even allowed him to feel me up a little but I wouldn't allow him to go any further. I keep fighting these goddamn emotions. He gets me so hot, I...I want to rip his clothes off and jump his bones but then I think of Grant and stop whatever I'm doing. Shit, it's pissed Jubal off a few times, let me tell you. This last time, he threatened to call it off, said I was nothing but a cock tease. I really had to beg him not to give up on me. Jesus, Trish...what's wrong with me? Here I have a wonderful and loving husband who is a terrific lover, and two great kids and I can't get Jubal out of my mind."
I heard Robyn groan.
"I want him to take me, to fuck my brains out. I feel, that...if I do this thing, you know, go all the way with him, I can get him and this idea that I'm getting to old to have men want me, out of my system."
I heard a crunch and looked down. I didn't realize it, but, I had grabbed one of our outdoor rattan chairs and shredded the backing. My knuckles were white as my fists had a death grip on the wood frame. Bits of rattan wood littered the ground.
"What was that?" I heard Trisha, her voice concerned, ask Robyn.
"I don't know, maybe the cat scratching the furniture again...don't change the subject Trish, what should I do?"
I slowly released the chair and let the blood back into my hands as I heard my sister-in-law's reply.
"Look, Robyn...you obviously have already made up your mind to do this. You just want me to justify it, and I won't. You are being the typically selfish little bitch you have always been when we were growing up. You say you love Grant but you still want to have this fling with that asshole, Jubal. You know this dickhead only wants to pop your panties. He doesn't love you and could care less about your marriage and family. But, god forbid, you don't get what you want. Lord help us all if you grow old without satisfying your itch! Well, listen and you better listen good; I can almost guarantee that if Grant finds out you did this, he will leave you. You know how much he has wanted to move up north, to live in Washington State. The only reason he has stayed here...is you. Well girl, this will give him the motivation."
Fucking A! Trisha you are so right, I thought. Maybe this isn't such a bad thing after all. As much as it would kill me to lose Robyn, well...hell, I'd get over the hurt. I love my wife but for the past three months she has been treating me like a leaper. Every time I would try to get intimate, she would feign a headache or was too tired. Three weeks back, I broached the issue and she came unglued. Robyn accused me of every ill that man had ever imposed upon a woman. The list was endless; I didn't understand her, I was too impatient or I lost my temper all the time. I had sex on the brain, I didn't support her, she was nothing more than a sex object. I didn't like her friends, I didn't love her anymore, I no longer found her attractive, I didn't help around the house enough. I was always working, I was never around for the kids, yada, yada, yada.
