Karen
Ch 3
I knew something was wrong. I sensed it all day by his unusual behavior. Robert was preoccupied and seemed a little jumpy. But, I chose to roll over and try to go to sleep; he would tell me when he was ready. And never in my wildest dreams would I have guessed what he would tell me.
"Hon," Robert said, "you can't go tomorrow."
I rolled back over towards him, "What? What did you say, sweetheart?"
He wouldn't look at me and repeated, "You can't go tomorrow."
We went back and forth a few times before his suffocating words spilled out. The words I will never forget.
"There's, there's a... girl... you just... can't."
My heart dropped into my stomach. I was immediately terrified he was about to tell me he cheated on me, or worse, was leaving me. But, then I saw love and concern on his face. He still loved me. I could feel his love and forced myself to do something really difficult -- not react and just listen.
His first reveal was that he wrote erotic stories for a website. To say I was shocked is the understatement of the year. My husband -- an erotic writer? I shook my head in disbelief.
You know, keeping a secret, like he apparently had for so long, still burned like a lie. However, curiosity became my dominant emotion and quieted the anger that initially boiled inside me.
He handed over his weapon of secrecy -- his laptop -- and I settled back against my pillow and read some of his chapters. I am not going to lie, his sexy stories stirred me. I had no clue my mild-mannered, quiet husband would ever write something like that. His stories explicitly described sharing me, his wife, with another man, while he was with another woman.
Shocking, yet oddly arousing. I tried to hide my hardening nipples, brushing against my nightgown. He watched me intently as I read and I could sense his fear at my reaction. I did my best to keep a poker face. Speaking of poker, the last chapter I read was about a strip poker game. Never did I consider Robert had these wild thoughts in his head.
I couldn't keep quiet any longer and my interrogation started. He tried very hard to downplay his involvement with Lush. But, I persisted until he caved and I found out about her -- the girl.
And the first thought in my head that came pouring out of my jealous mouth was, "This girl pretty?"
He nodded, "Yeah... very."
What saved my husband's life in the next few moments was the obvious discomfort he felt telling me this. He didn't want to hurt me. He sweat profusely and suffered in his deception. That counted for something.
Then it got worse. He said she had read his stories and wanted to play them out with him -- with my husband -- strip poker with my husband. MY HUSBAND!
All the dots connected in my head now. And I got the courage to ask if he was supposed to play this scene out this weekend ... while I was gone.
He confirmed my suspicion, but quickly added, "And her boyfriend; she has a boyfriend."
What kind of twisted thing was happening? He had planned strip poker with a stranger and her boyfriend? Who was this man I had been married to for the last thirteen years?
I felt ill at the thought of what might have transpired while I was in Portland. My husband considered cheating on me. I loved him and hated him at this moment. But, there was something in his expression that settled me down a little. He looked scared. Not just scared, but terrified. He was terrified of my response.
He quickly rambled about how he didn't want to go and would cancel his plans with her.
I guess he figured he was in this far, no point in holding back now. He vomited out all the details about the secret meeting he had with this girl and her boyfriend, planning how to reenact his story. And he sheepishly told me she was twenty-four. What every woman fears -- a younger woman. Insecurity raged inside me. My butt was too big. My tummy not flat enough. Too many wrinkles around my eyes.
The only thing that poured out my mouth, "And she's pretty, you said?"
He nodded, "Very."
This cut me like a knife. But, why did it matter if she was pretty? Would an ugly girl have made me feel any better? Probably not. I felt almost sick.
I sat lost in my thoughts for quite a while. The silence was deafening. All I could think about was I didn't want to lose my husband. I was terrified of what almost happened. He considered cheating on me! Apparently, he needed more in our marriage than he was getting from me and I may regret it, but I needed to explore this with him.
"Okay," I forced my lips to speak. "We'll go."
Needless to say, Robert's mouth dropped to the floor in utter confusion and disbelief. I almost had to stifle a laugh at him trying to make sense of what I had said. What a dumb time to even think about laughing!
I suppressed every hurt feeling bubbling up inside me and nonchalantly said, "I don't think I have anything for strip poker. Will have to do a little shopping tomorrow."
I gave his shocked face a light kiss and continued, "I'll read more tomorrow, but for now we better get some sleep. Tomorrow might be a late night." I almost couldn't even believe what I had just said.
I rolled back over in bed and silently cried myself to sleep.
~~~
Something happened in my brain while I slept because I woke up the next morning with a renewed optimism in my marriage. We had a great life, but he needed more. And I needed to explore that with him or risk him exploring it on his own.
It could have been worse. How many men would have run off and had their little sexual fun with that little hottie? Most, I imagine. He didn't have to tell me his secret last night. But, he did. He must want our marriage to work as much as I did.
So, I slapped a smile on my face and started breakfast.
He cautiously interacted with me all morning. I kept up my cheerful demeanor and even asked him to bring up the site so I could continue reading.
And then I saw her pictures on the site. Of course, she was young and hot and gorgeous. Pauli was her name. And this Pauli wanted my husband. I had thoughts of ripping her throat out. I did. I have never been one who shared well. But, what good would hurting her do? There would just be another. There was something Robert needed that I wasn't giving him.
I sat down to continue reading my husband's dirty little stories. He sat down on the couch and said he was going to write his next chapter. This was kind of nice and I would have to really self-reflect later about why he thought I wouldn't have understood his Lush writing.
Chapter after chapter I read. Occasionally, I would glance at Robert, feeling like I didn't know him at all. But, yet, his writing did feel like him. I had never read erotica before and you begin to feel like a voyeur, watching all the sex occurring in the character's lives. And it was impossible not to become affected by the scenes painted. I imagined Robert and myself in the husband/wife characters in his chapters, and the thought of him with another woman and me with another man was strangely arousing.
I felt the first drops of wetness in between my legs around chapter seven. Tanner was rubbing my shaven pussy as I watched my husband's cock ready to fuck Tanya. I was envisioning myself as Adriana in his story. Then, the dampness between my legs quickly progressed to light puddling in my panties. I didn't want Robert to know -- not yet anyways. I tried to soothe my ache by squeezing my legs together. Trying to be discreet, I slipped a hand under the laptop and rested my fingers against my clit.
Out of his eyesight, I gently rubbed my throbbing clit. One chapter later and I desperately needed to cum. Reading about Adriana removing her robe and sitting naked at the table with Tanner and her husband pushed me over the edge. I felt embarrassed, yet crazy aroused at the thought of two men raking their eyes over my naked body. I excused myself to go to the potty and collapsed against the sink as soon as the door was shut. I almost didn't recognize the flushed face staring back at me. Sliding my loose lounge pants down, I rapidly strummed my clit, while watching my face change in the mirror.
His story of each fucking another partner kept playing over and over in my mind while I furiously rubbed myself, bucking my hips pretending I was being fucked -- fucked by a man other than my husband, while he watched! And watching my husband kissing, licking, and fucking another woman unexpectedly excited me. My tummy started to tighten as my orgasm was building. I opened my mouth and silently screamed as I plummeted over the edge. Oh God! Oh God! The waves kept pouring as my pussy repeatedly clenched.
I leaned forward and rested my cheek on the counter, panting out the aftershocks. Oh God! I needed that release. I wish I could have shared this with Robert, but I was still stinging inside from his secrets.
After I regained my composure, I decided to go shopping. I needed some items for the evening.
