It started out to be a normal summer party with all of our closest friends. There were about 20 people in all, enjoying drinks and food though our house and deck during the humid August Saturday evening. Most of us are in our early to mid-thirties and the couples with young children at home started to leave around 9:30, the sun finally going down. I said goodbye to another couple out on the deck and I decided to start cleaning up. I had a handful of half-full drinks, and stepped through the sliding door into our kitchen when I realized that my friend, Rob, was still here, chatting with my wife on the couch in the living room. I went into the kitchen and cleaned up a bit. I gathered all the empty beer bottles, cleaned the wine glasses and took out the remaining trash. I looked over to the clock on the stove and noticed it was 10:30 now. I headed back into the living room, to my surprise, Rob was still chatting with my wife ... in the same spot for the last hour.
Rob has been one of my closest friends for over 10 years or so. We met when I just got out of college. We've played in a few recreational softball leagues together, and he was even part of the bridal party at my wedding seven years ago. At 36, he's a couple years older than me, but still single. He's one of our last single friends, but he is rarely lonely. Rob plays the dating scene very well. The ladies seem to flock to him. As opposed to me, Rob keeps in shape, working out and running regularly. At 6'3" he stands very tall and normally dresses very sharp. When we go to ballgames or the bar together, he puts no effort into starting up a conversation with a lovely lady. Me, on the other hand, I sit back and laugh to myself. The ladies don't notice a married guy, about 6" shorter than him with the beginnings of a "spare tire" around my waist.
"Rob, I didn't know you were still here. Can I get you guys something else to drink? I'm going to grab a beer," I ask.
Rob and my wife, Colleen, look up from their conversation. "Sure, Mike. I'll have a beer as well," Rob answers.
I look at my wife. She nods, "Wine please, honey."
I head into the kitchen, thinking to myself that my wife looks great tonight. Colleen and I have been married a while now, seven years, with no luck at having children, even though we've tried over and over. In the meantime, she's been able to concentrate on her career and we've lived comfortably with two full incomes. In fact, after trying repeatedly for over 4 years to get pregnant, in the last year we've barely tried at all.
Colleen is my age, 5'3" and keeps in good shape by attending regular aerobics classes. She has jaw-length, layered blonde hair and blue eyes. She's fair skinned, has an average chest and normally pampers herself with regular hair appointments, manicures and pedicures. She still has a gorgeous body that looks as good, if not better, than when we started dating. She's always been extremely conservative and reserved, and the way she dresses fits her personality. Colleen is the one that all our female friends go to for advice. She's always helpful, sweet and polite. In fact, I think I've only heard her swear about twice in 11 years of dating and marriage. "OK, drinks are coming up." I head into the kitchen to fix the drinks. As I'm pouring Colleen some wine at the counter, I can see them on the couch chatting quietly. Rob is dressed in jeans and a collared t-shirt, his arm alongside the back of the couch behind Colleen. She's wearing a flowered sundress with an open, white summer sweater. She's sitting right next to Rob, with her legs crossed and jiggling her foot in her white sandal, displaying a fresh pedicure with maroon polish. Her legs, arms and face have a nice, even summer tan on them. I take the caps off two beers and grab the wine. As I head back into the living room, Rob is leaning over and whispering in her ear. Colleen starts to giggle and abruptly stops when I step back into the room.
"Drinks for everyone," I say as I hand the beer to Rob and wine glass to my wife. They both take a sip and I take a seat opposite them in an overstuffed chair.
"Great party tonight, Mike," Rob breaks the silence.
"Thanks. I think everyone had a good time. You two seem to be having a nice chat in here," I say as I sip my beer. Rob clears his throat as Colleen stares at the ground in front of her, legs still crossed, jiggling her foot.
"Yes, well, Colleen and I have been talking about relationships. You know how good she is with advice," says Rob.
"Oh I know. The phone is always ringing; most of the women we know look to cry on Colleen's shoulder from time to time. Don't they, sweetie?" I reply.
She nods her head. "Uh-huh," she answers without looking up.
Rob clears his throat again. "Yes, I know Colleen is a fantastic listener, but, ah, tonight she was actually looking for some advice, from me."
I sip my beer again, then holding it in my lap. "Really, what about?"
"Your relationship, Mike. The relationship you and Colleen have," he answers.
I look a little inquisitive, not really knowing what he means. "Our marriage?" My eyes dart from Rob, over to Colleen. "Sweetie, is there a problem?"
My wife just sighs, still not looking at me. Both of her hands in her lap, fidgeting. Her foot is jiggling more, her sandal dangling off her painted toes. She looks up and over to Rob, as if he needs to answer for her.
"Ah, there is, Mike. Not that the two of you aren't great friends, I mean, I've known the both of you for a very long time, and you guys seem made for one another," Rob answers for her. I feel a bit more relaxed, thinking this isn't so bad.
"But," Rob continues, "Colleen isn't, shall we say ... satisfied." A deep breath can be heard from Colleen.
"Satisfied? I don't know what you mean. We've got a great house and careers. A ton of friends." I look confused as I set my beer down. "What is it?"
I stare at both of them. Rob turns and looks down at Colleen as she looks up at him, nodding, as if giving approval. Rob turns back to me. "Sexually satisfied, Mike," he answers as he lowers his arm on the back of the couch and places it around Colleen's shoulder.
I feel my face and ears start to get hot, stunned by what Rob just said. It's got to be a gag I thought. I let out a nervous chuckle.