It has been some time since I updated this story, but work and life sometimes get in the way. I appreciate the many comments I did receive asking for me to continue this story, and accept that some of you will enjoy it, while others will not.
I carried the birthday cake to the table, being careful to not let the candles burn out. There were only two of us there to share Jennifer's 11th birthday, with her, as we had invited her mother over for cake and ice cream. Tonight was family night, her big bash with all her friends would be held on the weekend. As I set the cake on the table, her mother in a cheerful voice encouraged her to blow out all the candles and make a wish.
Jennifer took a deep breath and blew hard, but one of the candles only flickered and didn't go out. I think both Sarah and I felt bad, after the candle blowing is important to a child, and started to commiserate with her, telling her it was okay.
After making a sad face for a minute, Jennifer spoke up saying, "It probably doesn't matter, after all I've made the same wish for the last few years, and we haven't become a family again, so I was probably wasting my breath."
I know I felt the sadness in her voice, and when I looked over at Sarah I could tell from the look in her eyes, that she felt it too. To her credit, Sarah spoke first, telling Jennifer that sometimes things didn't work out the way we wanted, and that sometimes things were just meant to be a certain way, but that both her mommy and daddy loved her.
The three of us sat around for a while, eating the cake and talking about happy things for Jennifer, the plans for her big party, her activities at school and how well she was doing on her soccer team. As we did, the mood brightened considerably, so that by the time Sarah left for her apartment, and Jennifer went to get ready for bed, all appeared to have been forgotten.
I finished cleaning up and went to watch some television before heading to bed myself. As I sat there Jennifer's comment came back to my mind. Thinking about it made me reflect on all that had happened since that fateful Saturday almost four years ago.....
Clearly, when I headed off to meet with the private investigator I'd hired to find out if my suspicions were correct about Sarah having an affair, I knew deep inside what I'd find out. As much as I hoped it wouldn't be true, there was just too much, too many clues to be anything but. Still, I had no idea as to whom she was fooling around with.
When he went through his report and identified the asshole who was cuckolding me, I recognized the fact that he was apparently a French glassblower, and recalled Sarah speaking about him many months ago, and how we'd teased each other about it. At the same time, I could recall similar teasing in the past, sometimes about a woman I'd met or noticed, sometimes about a guy whom she found attractive, or who appeared to notice her. I couldn't help but wonder if this was the only one, or had I been blind for years.
The pictures he handed me clearly wiped out any vestige of doubt, there she was, my Sarah, the only woman I'd loved or made love to, involved in every sexual activity with this animal. The looks on her face, the actions she was performing, things that I'd always assumed were reserved for me. Even though I'd been expecting this, the reality of the report, and the pictures blew me away.
Part of me wanted to find that bastard and rip his head off, cut off his cock and feed it to the dogs. But I knew I couldn't do that, as much as I might want to. I had met with my attorney a few weeks ago, to find out about my rights, especially as they related to our daughter. He pointed out that in our state, the non-cheating spouse almost always was granted custody, unless they were considered violent and dangerous. Clearly doing what I so desperately wanted to do, could allow me to be considered violent and dangerous, if not sent to jail for criminal assault causing bodily harm.
I loved my daughter with every ounce of my being, and couldn't risk losing her because of this vermin, who'd stepped in to ruin my marriage, and take away what I'd always assumed would be my one and only love. As for Sarah, the thought of her having custody of Jennifer, after destroying me through her actions, would have been too much. If I lost Jennifer now, I may as well kill myself, for my reasons for living would have been gone.
All this was running through my mind as I headed home for the confrontation, thankful only for the fact that Jennifer wouldn't have to see or hear it. Yes it would be hard to explain it to her, hell, I didn't understand it myself, why had Sarah gone and destroyed us, and what we had. Thank god that I had given this a lot of thought before I got home for the planned confrontation, or otherwise I may have acted a lot differently than I did.
So much for rational thought. Nothing, not even the pictures prepared me for the shock I experienced when I turned to look in our bedroom and found my wife, my supposed love, on all fours on our marital bed, with this bastard drilling his cock up her ass. In some ways now I can almost laugh, albeit bitterly, at the thought that I'd find her performing the one sexual activity she'd denied me, with her lover.
I've done my share of reading erotic stories online, after all, who hasn't. The stories that amaze, and almost sicken me, are those where a husband gets off on half the neighborhood screwing his wife, how he has to jerk off, join in or cum in his pants. Let me tell you, there was no such reaction as I'd stared at what was going on in front of me. To this day I still don't know how I held off being physically sick right then and there. After choking my lunch back down into my stomach, my first reaction was to kick him square in the balls and beat him to within an inch of his life. It took every ounce of willpower I possessed to overcome those feeling, constantly reminding myself about Jennifer, and how I couldn't let her down in the way her mother had let both of us down.
Even then, I didn't have any desire to hit or beat Sarah, I've never hit her or any other woman, and never will. At one point I think she tried to reach out to hug me, but I quickly recoiled and pulled away, never wanting to touch her again.
As I sat thinking about what had gone on, I realized that much of what happened I'd confronted them was a blur. I remembered her crying, wondering to myself if it was solely because she'd been found out, or did she actually regret her actions, but I can't remember much of what either of us said. I knew I needed to get out of there, the sight of the messed up bed, the smell of their activities being more than I could bear, so I remember telling her I'd be back the next day, and that she better be ready to move out before I had to pick Jennifer up.
By the time I'd returned the next day, I was again in control of my emotions, though overwhelmed with the hurt and pain of her treachery. Even know I can't believe how Sarah tried to explain it away as only 'sex', telling me that she still loved me, and that we could work thing out. Yeah right, her actions to date sure had shown me how much she 'loved' me, and where I fit in that competition with 'sex'.
One of the hardest things I had to do was to tell my daughter that mommy wasn't living with us any more, but that she would still see her from time to time. She couldn't understand it, and I wasn't going to explain why, she was to young and didn't need that. But I knew that it was important for her mother to be part of her life, and that mommy loved her. As much as I would have preferred never letting Sarah see Jennifer again, I knew I couldn't take her away from her mother forever, without it backfiring on me or more importantly, Jennifer in the long run. Even though I hated Sarah at that moment, I had to acknowledge that she had been a good loving mother to Jennifer, attentive and caring.
I must admit that those first few months were the roughest on me. In looking back, I'm not proud of the increased drinking. No, I didn't go and get drunk all the time, but I started having a drink or two after getting Sarah down for the night, and on a few weekends when Jennifer was with Sarah, I did sit and drown my sorrows, feeling sorry for myself as I tried to figure out what went wrong. Had I been the one that screwed up, or the old constant, why did she do it. Maybe it was fortunate that as we get older, it takes us longer to recover from a hard night of drinking, so I don't think there was a real risk that booze would take over my life.
Given a choice between macho pride, or doing what was best for Jennifer, I decided to swallow my pride, and work to ensure that Jennifer did get quality time with Sarah. I granted her every second weekend with Jennifer, along with other visitation rights. I also bit my tongue and tried to act polite whenever she came to pick up or return Jennifer, telling myself that it was in the best interests of Jennifer to act like a reasonable person, rather than pouring out my bitterness and anger.
I was somewhat surprised when about a month after our separation Sarah asked to speak to me, and even more shocked when she gave what seemed to be a sincere apology, accepting all the blame, sounding a little like the Sarah I'd known and loved. But at the same time, she was still the Sarah that had betrayed me, had lost my respect and trust, things I didn't think I would ever regain. I told her I accepted her apology, though in truth, only as a token apology. After all, should one moment of apparent sincerity overcome months of betrayal, months when she purported to act as my loyal, loving wife?