Are You Having Fun

I should have seen it coming. Hell, I should have expected it, but it was till a surprise when I was served with divorce papers at work. Things have been crappy around the house for almost a year, starting with a diminishing sex life, to a non-existent one. Myra has been moody and argumentative and could fly off the handle for no reason at any time. It had gotten to the point where I didn't even want to come home after work. It was the kids that kept me there, Mike 14 years old and Kerry 12. Two good kids, but I could see the strain of a divided household getting to them. Not only did she file for divorce but she got an order barring me from my own house. That really pissed me off. I called my company lawyer and he referred me to Abe Kaplan who specialized in matrimonial cases.

Abe told me to bring the papers over ASAP.

He looked over the papers and then at me.

"Have you ever hit her?"

"I never laid a hand on her except to make love and that hasn't happened in the last year."

"What about the kids?"

"What about them?"

"Did you ever hit them or abuse them?"

"Of course not, they are the only reason I stayed around. She has been a bitch lately."

"Then why did she get a restraining order?"

"I don't know. I don't even have a change of underwear. Everything I own is in the house."

He made a phone call and then told me to be at my house at three o'clock to meet a deputy there who will escort me in to pack whatever I would need for a week.

"If your wife is there don't talk to her, don't even look at her. If the kids are there just tell them that you can't live at home now but you will explain everything next week. We will have a hearing on the restraining order on Monday and get this straightened out."

I went home and met the deputy and when we entered the house no one was there. I packed what I needed and then spent the weekend at a motel. On Monday, we were before the judge and Abe and I repeated the interview we had in his office. The judge asked a few questions and then looked again at the order.

"I don't see any allegations of spousal or child abuse so I don't see why this order was issued. I am removing it. You are free to enter your home Mr. Lewis but I warn you if there are any accusations of abuse you may end up in jail."

"Don't worry Your Honor, the less I have to do with her the better."

I went home that evening to a stone faced Myra. She said,

"Don't expect me to cook and clean for you."

"I don't expect anything from you. I don't know what has happened to us but I have been unhappy too. I just never expected this divorce without any discussion between us."

"I don't love you any more."

"I can understand that but why now?"

"I have found someone else."

"How long have you been fucking him?"

If looks could kill, the one she gave me would have taken my head off. I just returned it and she blinked first.

"Almost a year."

Now it was my turn to give the dirty look.

"Here in the house?'

"Sometimes, when the kids were in school."

"Why? Was I so awful that you had to cheat on me?"

"No you were not awful, just dull. You never wanted to go out. You were never fun. You never wanted to party or go dancing or do anything exciting. You were never even a good lover."

"Well I guess that says it all."

I moved out as soon as I found a small apartment.

She wanted alimony, child support and the house and she got it all. The thing that killed me was that I had to continue paying the mortgage even though I wasn't living there. I had visitation rights with the kids and I kept up with them as much as possible and we still got along fine. I would get unsolicited reports from them about life at home. It seems lover boy moved in as soon as the divorce became final. There was a lot of sex between Myra and Jim and it didn't bother Myra that the kids were home or awake when it happened. Myra finally did marry the guy after he got his divorce; the two of them had dumped their spouses to be together. At least it ended my alimony and mortgage payments. There was also a lot of drinking and partying. Myra wanted excitement and fun so I guess she go what she wanted. I was dating occasionally and once I went with a date to a local club there was a noisy table across the dance floor. Included in the raucous group was Myra and Jim.

Mike turned sixteen and got his drivers license. He was so proud and I was too. He was tall good looking and a pretty good student. I often took him to ball games and we spent some good times together doing guy things. He told me there was a lot of drinking going on at home and I told him,

"Look, you are growing up fast. You have lots of privileges and with them come lots of responsibilities. You are driving and going out with girls, I don't want to hear about any DUI's or someone getting knocked up. You see a lot of drinking around your home and that may make it attractive to you but that's the cause of a lot of unhappiness."

"Don't worry Dad, I'll be careful."

But of course he wasn't and one night I got a call,

"Dad, I am in jail."

"What happened? Did you call your mother?"

"I did but there was no one home."

"Why are you in jail?"

"I was in an accident and I failed the sobriety test."

"Damn it Mike I told you. Alright, its midnight and I can't do anything for you now. What time is your hearing tomorrow?"

"They told me ten o'clock."

"I will be there."

I was there with a lawyer from Abe's office and the kid got a $500.00 fine and his license suspended for six months. Mike thanked me for paying the fine and I told him,

"Don't worry you are going to pay me back. You will work this summer and turn over your pay check until the fine is paid off."

Myra was there too and she said,

"Why are you being so tough on him, he only had a few drinks?"

"Myra, he had a DUI and a suspension. He could have killed himself or someone else. Did you give him that liqueur?"

"We always have a drink at five o'clock and wine with dinner."

"Is he included?"

"Of course, he's a big boy now."

"He is not seventeen yet."

"But look how tall he is. He is already a man."

I looked at her like she was crazy and then I really looked at her. She was always a bit plump but it was in the right places. Now her tits were huge and her ass was spread. She had a double chin and her waist had thickened. She must have put on twenty or thirty pounds. She wasn't cute any more, she wasn't even pretty. I guess all that booze has to go somewhere. Not quite forty but she looked matronly and still was not ready to face reality.

Mike turned eighteen and in the fall went off to college so now I had more time to spend with Kerry. She was sixteen and looked better than her mother had when I fell in love with her. As pretty as Myra had been, Kerry outdid her by far, she really was a beauty. If she wasn't my daughter I would have loved to bed her, evidently so did Jim. We were out shopping one day and she was not herself. Normally she is ebullient and vivacious, a bit flirty and fast becoming a woman but today she was subdued and quiet.

"What's wrong Honey, you are not yourself today."

"Nothing Dad."

"Don't tell me that. I know you and I know something is bothering you. What is it?"

"It's something at home."

"What, too much drinking again?"

"No, it's Jim."

"What about him.?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night and he was in bed with me."

"What! Did he touch you? Did he do anything? Did you tell your mother?"

"He had his hand on my breast and he was rubbing his penis against my backside. I told her but she poopooed it. She said he was just horny."

I was furious. I went to see Myra and screamed at her.

"Do you know what your husband is doing to you daughter."

Then I looked at her. She was huge. She looked like she weighed over 250 pounds and she said,

"I know, I told him he could. I told him he could use her to get his rocks off but he can't fuck her."

"Are you crazy or just sick? That's our sixteen year old daughter you are pimping out."

"He promised he wouldn't fuck her. Look at me. He doesn't want me any more. He says I am too fat and he will divorce me if he can't have some kind of sex at home."

Now I was beyond furious and I took Kerry home with me and I called Abe. It took two months but after a hearing and testimony from Kerry I got custody of her and that ended the child support payments to Myra. Since Jim didn't have a sex toy at home he divorced Myra and then he skipped out of state to avoid any alimony and she consequently defaulted on the mortgage for the house. She had never worked after we got married so she ended up with no job, no husband to support her and no money for booze. Her kids had no use for her, since all she had done was get them into trouble, and they refused to have anything to do with her.

I guess having a lot of fun turned out to be not so much fun after all.