Brian punched the gas of his Audi sedan as he crossed the Delaware River, and hit 85 mph as he merged onto the New Jersey Turnpike for his trip north. Luckily for him, the Turnpike was relatively traffic free on this Saturday morning, and drivers here were generally expected to be going that fast in these conditions. Brian didn't want to be pulled over and asked where he needed to be in such a hurry. "To kill my best friend," was the only answer that came to mind. He figured a New Jersey State Trooper would not find that particularly amusing.
As he settled in to his drive, Brian did begin to think about exactly what he wanted to accomplish here. He wanted to do a lot of things to Chris right now, but talking to him was near the bottom of the list. Actually, the person he really wanted to talk to was Chris' wife, Liz. She knew about what happened between her husband and his wife for 2 years now, and somehow she was OK with it? Nothing about that made sense to Brian.
He was also a little angry at her. Sure, he couldn't really consider her a close friend. They had honestly lost touch over the years, and his anger returned as he began to realize exactly why they had; why Chris had seemingly avoided all his calls for the longest time, only to suddenly call back at random times and become interested in seeing him again—'he didn't really want to see me,' Brian fumed.
But he felt like Liz at least owed him a phone call, to tell him what she had learned, about what a lie he was living. He would have done it for her, he was sure of that. And for the life of him, he had no idea how Liz could forgive such a betrayal. Brian wanted to talk some sense into her, almost as much as he wanted to beat the living crap out of her husband. Almost, but not quite.
As he approached Exit 10 and made the turn on Route 287 North toward Chris and Liz's house, Brian tried to force himself to calm down. Rage and fury were nice, but he knew he also needed his wits about him. And right now, only one vision could sufficiently calm him down.
He thought back to last night, when he was on top of Cat, inside her, and remembered the look on her face as she began her orgasm. She was staring so intently into his eyes; it felt in that moment to him that he owned 100% of this woman, her mind, body and soul. Just the thought of that was enough to make Brian smile.
But he couldn't deal with any of that right now. His life had become a train wreck, and he quickly divided it into priorities. First, he needed to confront Chris, and get something...revenge? closure?...he wasn't entirely sure. He just knew he needed to do this before he could move on to his other problems.
Then he had to make sure his kids were OK. As a child of divorce, he knew how that affected children; he was basically his kids' age when his parents divorced. Brian wasn't sure that was what he wanted, but whatever he decided his kids' well-being had to be a major part of it.
Finally, he needed to work through everything with Amy. At this moment, he was disgusted by the sight of her, but as this news sunk in, he realized that would likely change. He had to figure out a way to talk to her, honestly even be able to look at her, and he desperately needed answers as to why she behaved like she did, especially given her history, their history.
Only then, after all that was decided, could he really figure out what Cat meant to him. He never thought he could ever look at another woman and feel anything like he felt toward his wife. But being with Cat last night he did feel something; he just wasn't sure what it meant. He had gone there looking for comfort and an escape, and Cat had been there for him. And maybe (probably he thought sadly) he had taken advantage of her crush on him.
But it didn't feel like just a random, revenge hook-up to him, not even in the cold light of the morning. It meant something to Brian, and he realized he still needed that escape, at least tonight.
But he couldn't commit to anything beyond that, at least not yet. He had to piece his life back together first. As he crossed under Route 78, he realized he was now only about 15 minutes away from Morris Township, where Chris and Liz lived. He began to ready himself for a confrontation.
He pulled up a few houses away, and looked toward their home. Suddenly, he saw Chris leaving his house, and began to exit his vehicle, hands balled into fists. But then he saw Liz with him, and their three kids, in various sports uniforms. He thought of his own kids in that moment, how they would feel if some man came out of nowhere and attacked their father. He forced himself to calm down and stay in his car as they pulled away.
Brian stayed parked on their street for 30 minutes, then an hour, just staring ahead with only his thoughts to accompany him. A luxury car didn't stand out in this neighborhood, so he drew no suspicions, even though he was staring at one house in particular. 'What am I doing?' he finally thought, 'This won't solve anything.' He began to turn on his car and drive home. Then, he saw an SUV pull back into the Barnes' driveway.
Chris and Liz were alone this time, having dropped their children off at their practices. Brian watched as they exited their car, and fumed as Chris put his arm around his wife as they returned into their home. 'My life is ruined, primarily by this guy, and he gets to live his life like nothing happened. He got away with everything. Not anymore.' Brian exited his car and walked directly to the front door and rang the doorbell.
Liz answered, "Brian?" she said awkwardly. Instantly she saw a look which she was familiar with, a mixture of total heartbreak and total rage. 'So the bitch finally told him,' Liz thought to herself. Chris had told her he ran into Amy; she didn't like hearing that at the time, now she wondered where this was going.
She tried to give Brian a sympathetic look, but it was like he didn't see her. At that point, she heard her husband, "Who's at the door, honey?" Brian heard him too, and turned his head. Liz remembered what Chris had told her, about what she should do if this moment ever occurred. She stepped aside and let Brian and Chris see each other; her husband was right, this needed to play out without her stepping in.
"You son of a bitch!" Brian yelled. "You ruined my life, now I'm going to ruin yours!" He lunged toward Chris, who made no move to defend himself. Brian cocked his left fist and threw it, connecting with Chris' right cheek, just below his eye. He staggered but stayed on his feet. Brian then threw a second punch to his gut, and Chris fell to his knees, gasping for air.
Brian taunted him from above. "Is that all you got?" he sneered. "15 years of fucking my wife, you deserve more punishment." He went to throw another punch at Chris, who still made no move to fight back.
At that point, Liz stepped in between them. She knew what her husband told her, that she should let Brian do whatever he wanted to him, but she couldn't let anymore happen. Brian was going to seriously hurt her husband if this went any farther, especially if he didn't fight back.
"OK, that's enough, I think he gets the point," said Liz, positioning her body to shield Chris from any more blows.
"Get out of the way, Liz. Haven't you protected him long enough?" Brian said with disdain.
"Think of your kids, Brian. If this goes any farther you're going to do something you'll really regret. They're going to need you with them right now, not in prison," she said forcefully.
It was enough to calm Brian down. He backed away and sat on their sofa a few feet away, head in his hands. Liz turned to check on her husband.
"Are you OK," she said with concern, running her hand along his rapidly swelling cheek.
"I'm good, I can clean myself up," he said, grabbing her hand and kissing it. "I'll go pick up the kids later...I'll think of something to explain this. You need to do what we talked about."
"I know," she said, smiling at her husband and turning toward Brian. Her husband didn't let go of her hand though, so she turned back to look at him.
"Thank you Liz, for everything, for being here, for staying" he said, with a tear in his eye.
Liz said nothing at first, instead gently running her hand down her husband's cheek again and smiling at him. "Put something on this," she said softly. "We'll be back in a little while." She then turned to Brian, "You could use a drink...and we need to talk. I'll drive."
Brian got up and followed her, but not before looking at Chris, still sitting on the floor. He saw the shame in his eyes; Chris could barely look at him. Brian felt a moment of superiority, but then quickly realized how pointless that was; it didn't make him feel any better in the end. He followed Liz and got into her car.
She took him into Morristown and to one of the bars on South Street, near the Green. They went to a corner booth and ordered their drinks, a Scotch for Brian and a red wine for her.
Liz knew he needed so many answers; she wasn't sure how much his wife had told him. Frankly, she could only answer so much herself. But she had to calm him down, so he could talk rationally to her husband. He needed to do that, both of them needed to do that.
"When Chris told me he ran into your wife, we thought something like this might happen," Liz began. "Chris and I talked about it a lot, about what would happen. It kind of played out exactly like he thought."
"You should have left us alone," Brian replied. "He deserves to pay for his sins."
"Was I supposed to let you really hurt him?" Liz answered. "Whatever you think of him, he is paying for his sins, he pays for it every day, when he looks at himself."
"I can't believe you defend him, after all he's done," Brian sneered. "You've just let him off the hook."
"You have no idea what I went through, how hard it was, for me, for my kids, and yes for my husband," Liz said. "For almost a year I could barely look at him, barely be in the same room as him. But as time passed, I saw everything he was doing to atone, to become my husband again. He met every condition I gave him. I checked his phone and emails constantly; he even still offers to let me check them now. He threw himself into our family, into wooing me again. And he talked about his issues, first with his therapist then with me, about why he felt he did it."
"Slowly, I began to let go of the hate and see the man I married," Liz continued. "When I was able to do that, I could see what I wanted. And what I wanted was him, our family. It wasn't easy, but in my heart it was the right decision to forgive him and begin to move past it."
"So that's it?" said Brian unconvinced. "You never thought of leaving him?"
"I thought about it all time, I almost did many times, but something kept me from doing it; my kids at first, but then Chris too over time," Liz explained. "I tried dating other men, first to get back at Chris but also for a release, to forget my pain. I knew Chris was aware, but he didn't say anything."
