Crossing back to our own boat at last, I felt like a bull elk in rut. I was edgy, aroused, agitated, rankled and jealous about Kristi, and completely uncomfortable in my own skin. I needed to get laid soon. Or punch something, whichever opportunity came up first.
I decided to go back up top by the bar to wait for Kristi; maybe a good, stiff drink would help. As I reached the stairs I passed a small group of people and heard a voice announce in a very pompous manner: "Sure, you can see global warming is real. I was up at Glacier National Park this summer and the glaciers were much smaller than when I was there seven years ago."
Now, normally I'm fairly non-confrontational, but this stupid statement just caught me at exactly the wrong moment. From my position on the lowest step I could see that the speaker was a slender, well-groomed, slightly balding guy, probably about 5'8" tall and in his late forties. In khaki shorts and Izod.
Before I could stop myself, I said in a loud voice "Yeah, and 11,000 years ago Wisconsin was under a glacier over a mile thick, and when I was there last August there wasn't a trace of it. Well, except a few small pieces in my Scotch."
His head snapped around and he quickly picked me out. "What's that supposed to mean?"
I shrugged. "Nothing. I just thought we were discussing melting ice and thought I'd throw in my two cents worth."
He sneered. "I suppose you're one of those climate change skeptics, a real flat earth type."
It was starting to look like the opportunity to punch something might just arrive first! "Oh, no, on the contrary. I absolutely believe in climate change, I've seen the geologic evidence that it's happened many times over the earth's history. I just question how much of any change has anthropomorphic origins."
He looked blank, so I filled in for him. "Man-caused."
He bristled. "I knew that! So you don't think greenhouse gases can cause climate change? That's foolish!"
I was so going to enjoy the feel of my fist meeting his face! "No, what's foolish is destroying entire industries, maybe an entire economy, based on a completely unproven theory. I think the jury is still out, and until we know we shouldn't do anything stupid."
"But all the experts agree that CO2 is causing warming."
"Sorry bub, but I can match you scientist for scientist on both sides of the fence. There are plenty of climatologists and meteorologists that think the computer models are severely flawed, and some evidence actually shows cooling. Of course, as has been shown, that data did not meet the proper political agenda, so it got buried. But still, you could be right."
"But most people think..."
I laughed "Now there you've got me! It has been a very effective propaganda campaign, and I certainly can't match up to all of your grade school-educated stars and starlets, or your rich fat-cat politicians that stand to get even richer out of the taxpayer's pocket if carbon control legislation passes. All I can do is look at the facts."
This was actually turning out to be kind of fun, and was providing a distraction from my problems. I stuck my hand out, and made it a point to crush his when it was proffered. He winced. "I'm Adam, by the way. And you are?"
He puffed up a little. "I'm Congressman Gerald Martin, Adam, and I can't believe you think it's not getting warmer - can't you feel it, see it?"
I was surprised! "Seriously, a U.S. Congressman, a member of the House?"
It turned out he was indeed, from a nearby western state. I was pretty glad I hadn't punched him - it's probably against some law, although the case could be made that any such law desperately needs to be repealed!
I went back to his question. "Seriously Gerry - can I call you Gerry?" He didn't object, so I went on. "Gerry, where I live it did seem to get hotter between about 1999 and 2004 or so, but that didn't happen world-wide, and you're confusing weather with climate. If it happens for a year, or five years, or fifteen years, well, that's weather, and it changes constantly, in relatively short cycles. When it happens for fifty or a hundred years, or more, then you're starting to talk about climate."
He frowned. "So you really don't think we should do anything?"
I laughed. "Again, you misinterpret my meaning! We should of course take common sense measures, shoot for high-mileage cars, conserve, generate power with non-fossil fuel sources like nuclear and hydroelectric when possible..."
He cut in. "Nuclear is too dangerous, and it would be a sin to dam up any rivers just to make power!"
I slapped him on the shoulder, laughing. "Surely you catch the irony of you making that statement while you're floating around enjoying yourself on this big old lake behind - oops, you guessed it - a giant hydroelectric dam!"
He looked surprised for a moment, then laughed and shook his head ruefully. "You set me up and took me down right there! This is kind of fun Adam, come on, let's go upstairs and freshen our drinks."
We climbed the steps, followed by a couple of attractive women and other members of his retinue and went to the bar, now being tended by Ronnie and Sandra. Ronnie looked at me and raised his eyebrows, silently asking how I was doing. I shrugged and smiled at him, touched by his concern. I looked for and spotted Kori, standing by the front rail, drink in hand, talking to Doug and Pam. Pam saw me and waved.
By now there were probably between twenty and thirty people on our upper deck, several in the hot tub, and more on the deck below. All four of the boats around the inner square looked equally well populated; I guessed the party in the cove had attracted over two hundred people and at least twenty houseboats, as well as several smaller craft.
Sandra brought us drinks, giving me a brilliant smile when she recognized me. I had to admit, Ronnie has good taste. She was seriously exotic, pretty and sexy, and I noticed the Congressman's eyes run hungrily over her body. I called him back to earth.
"Gerry, the problem is you guys want to have your cake and eat it too. Right now the transportation sector - all phases - is about ninety percent reliant on fossil fuels. And in the interest of full disclosure, I work in the oil industry, out on the fringes in the R&D sector. But the transportation issue is not going to change or go away anytime soon, there are no viable alternatives available. So we should conserve as best we can and continue to research other technologies. The truth is I don't want to dam any more rivers either."
He stopped me. "What about electric cars, or hydrogen powered, those technologies are available."
"Available yes, functional no. We just aren't quite there yet, and what they do have is ridiculously expensive and sets up all new pollution problems from the batteries involved. And even if good electric cars were available it would take ten or fifteen years for the fleet to roll over. And when - or if - we do get there, where is all the electricity to recharge these cars or to produce and concentrate the hydrogen fuel going to come from? Fossil fuels, coal and natural gas?"
He looked thoughtful, involved, so I continued. "It takes enormous amounts of power to create those fuels or charge that many batteries. Burning fossil fuels to generate power for alternative auto and truck fuels just trades one problem, one CO2 source for another. Nuclear is the only viable, available, and somewhat reasonably priced answer for clean, dependable power. Without damming rivers."
This was a pet subject of mine, so he had unwittingly played right into my hands.
He started to speak, then paused, frowning. He had turned out to not be such a bad guy, despite my first impressions. And that's a major concession from me when talking about any politician. "We can get our electricity from wind and solar, those are both proven technologies."
I laughed. "Yeah, proven to be extremely expensive and unreliable! Seriously Gerry, when a company steps up that can provide dependable, consistent solar or wind power, at a reasonable price, and - here's the kicker - without any taxpayer subsidies, I'll be their biggest cheerleader. And stockholder. So far nobody is even close, and may never be. It's the nature of the beast, it's just not always sunny or windy where and when you need it, and there is no way to store the energy, or transmit it long distances effectively."
I was so engrossed in the argument that I had momentarily forgotten all about Kristi, until I saw him look over my shoulder and watched his eyes widen appreciatively. Long, cold, wet hair touched my back, soon followed by a warm, firm body that I knew so well, and her arms came around me.
She kissed my shoulder and neck. "Hi baby, did you see me skiing? It was a blast, that boat is so damn fast, and Ty is great with it. I'm pumped!"
I smiled. I had known she would be, all of her senses and nerve endings firing from the vigorous and fast paced action. I pulled her up next to me and put my arm around her shoulders, squeezing her to me as we kissed. "I did babe, you looked amazing. Thought you were going to kill yourself on that one maneuver though, that was insane."
She laughed. "It was fun! A little closer than I intended, I think I drenched a couple of guys on the boat."
I laughed. "You sure did. But they deserved it, I'll tell you later. In the meantime, I'd like to introduce you to a real U.S. Congressman, Rep. Gerald Martin. Gerry, this is my fiancee' Kristi."
They shook hands, and he held onto hers. "Please call me Gerry, Kristi, it's a pleasure to meet you.' His eyes ate her up, running over her face and body with no trace of subtlety. While this demonstrated better taste and judgment than I would have expected from a politician, it was beginning to piss me off!
She pulled her hand free. "Really, a U.S. Congressman? Currently?"
He smiled and preened a little. "Yes ma'am, second term. My constituents like me!"
Kristi smiled. "Can I get my picture taken with you?"
He looked her over again and smiled proudly. "Sure, I don't know why not." He turned to one of his posse. "Frank, do you have a camera?"