I sat watching the TV. USC was playing Nebraska. It was a close game heading into the 4th quarter. Without Reggie Bush and Lendel White, USC had their hands full. I notice my wife walk out of the kitchen. She had a sour look on her face. It seems like lately she always has a sour look on her face. Two months ago our youngest had just left for college and for the first time in 18 years we were alone with each other.
I think any time we are alone her facial expressions change. My name is Bill Jackson and I am 44 years old living in sunny Orange County, California. My wife Sheila had spent most of her adult life as a housewife raising three kids. About a year ago she had decided to go back to work.
It was at that time that I started noticing the subtle changes in her attitude. The frequency of sex started slowly dropping off. I never made a big deal about it. I just figured that was par for the course when you were married for 22 years.
Soon after she started working, she joined a 24 Hour Fitness gym. She could get herself back into shape. I thought that was a great idea. So I started going back to the gym on a regular basis. I need to drop a few pounds. I spent too much sitting at a desk job and not getting out into the field. I needed to do something to tone up.
I feel better getting my work-out in the early morning before I start work. I seem to have more energy at that time of the day. If I worked out in the evening, I was normally too tired to enjoy it. My wife was the opposite. She hated getting up early and would either go for a workout during a long lunch break for go right after work before coming home.
I began to realize our schedules were making us strangers in our own home. We had always participated in the kids' school and athletic activities but, now with the kids gone, it was apparent that we shared very little in common. I could see us steadily drifting apart into our own worlds.
I tried my best to remedy the situation but with much success. I suggest nights at the movies, going out to dinner, taking a cruise, but nothing seemed to draw her interest. I knew my marriage was in trouble and a divorce was looming on the horizon. All that was missing was a trigger to set it off. It was frustrating waiting for the other shoe to drop and knowing I couldn't stop the inevitable.
Sheila's facial expressions when I was in her presence seemed to grow sourer as each week passed. Finally, one day I asked her if anything was bothering her and if she wanted to talk about it. She turned and looked at me and said, "I am not happy." When I asked why she was not happy, she looked away and said she didn't know.
I wasn't stupid. I know one guy's good girl just might be another guy's bad girl! So my wife may not be so innocent and faithful to "death do us part." I seriously doubted that her sexual drive had lessened in any way. Her loss of sexual desire for me probably meant that she had either found some one else or was getting close, and may be even thinking that she married the wrong guy.
Her depression from being around me may be due to her temporarily loosing the buzz she gets from being around the guy that she has been banging. I wonder how many soul mates she has previously banged in her search for Mr. Right.
A few days later, after dinner, Sheila told me that she wanted to separate to "find herself." She tried to convince me that she may be able to save our marriage if she could just have some space, some time to herself. What I think she really wanted was to spend more time with her lover and rid herself of the restriction of living with me, but keep the security of marriage tucked away in a little box to be brought out at her convenience.
That idea would fly right next to the "next cold day in hell." She probably assumed that I did not suspect the real possibility of her affair and her disinterest in sex with me would still leave her with 'good girl" status in my eyes. I guess she never knew me that she would so underestimate me. I knew that I couldn't let her play me anymore. It was time to take action!
It would be easy to catch her. I hid a few small voice activated recorders around the house and underneath the seat of her car. I also planted a GPS monitor in her car so I would always know where her car was.
It only took a couple of days to find out who se was seeing and where and when she was meeting him. The guy's name was Bob Martin, married with two kids and worked as a salesman in her office. I wasn't as upset as I was disgusted with her actions.
If Sheila would have told me, "Look Bill, this isn't working anymore. I don't love you, the kids have left, and I want to look for some one else to spend my life with." I would have been upset and hurt, but I would have respected her for her honesty and would have moved on without any animosity.
But that is not what she did. She snuck around behind my back looking for a replacement while hanging on to the security and life style that I provided. She mad my life miserable with her sour attitude, she cut me off form her spousal duty of providing her partner with sex, and she trashed her marriage vows for her own selfish actions.
No, I will not go quietly into the night. The punishment will fit the crime. Now I had to decide what that would be. Time was on my side and I could strike unexpectedly on my terms and on my turf.