Abby

I guess that's when it finally got through to me, I had lost her and there was nothing I could do about it. I had lost my taste for spying on Abby and decided it was time to start trying to get over her. On Monday morning I waited for Abby to leave for work and I went back into her house for the last time retrieve the cameras. I took the video tape out of the recorder and threw it in the trash and then packed the equipment into my car and that afternoon I returned it to Roger.

I stopped working at home and I kept myself extremely busy at the office to keep from thinking about the images I had seen of Abby having sex with Ben. I also decided to move, not and easy decision, so that I would not have to deal with the pain of seeing the man who replaced me in Abby's life coming and going from her apartment. I was sure he was going be around a lot more and I just couldn't stand knowing that he was next door fucking my wife. I began looking for an apartment in town closer to my office.

It took me two weeks to find a good apartment, which was just five blocks from my office. I moved out of the duplex on a Friday while Abby was at work to avoid seeing her. The last thing I did before I left the house was put a 'For Rent' sign in the window.

The following Monday Abby called me in my office. I was surprised to hear from her as we had not spoken for over a month.

Abby said, "Hello Mike, how are you."

I said, "I'm fine Abby, how are you."

"I'm good."

There was silence on the phone for several seconds.

I said, "I know you didn't call just to ask how I was so why did you call?"

"I saw the 'For Rent' sign in your window and just wondered what was going on."

I said, "I decided to get an apartment closer to my office. It is much more convenient for me. I am buried with work right now and I like that I don't have to drive more than an hour to get home after working late at the office."

Abby said, "I though you were doing a lot of your work from home."

I wondered how Abby would know I had been working at home. I never told her. I wondered what else she knew. Did she know why I was working from home? I hoped not. I never wanted her to know that I had been spying on her. Not just because it would anger her and humiliate me but it also be something she could use against me in divorce proceedings. I hoped that by moving that it didn't matter anymore. If she didn't know I was spying on her before she would never find out now.

I said, "That wasn't working out for me. I wasn't productive enough. I'm just able to get more done at the office."

"I guess nothing has changed then."

I wanted to yell over the phone, "What the fuck do you mean nothing has changed. I'm living alone and another man is fucking my wife. I think that's a pretty fucking big change don't you?" But rather than exacerbate the situation I said, "Was there something else you wanted to ask me?"

She said, "It's just that it was your idea that we both live in the duplex so I was surprised to see that you had moved out. I was also a little upset that you didn't bother to discuss it with me before you moved."

I said, "Listen, You chose to move on with your life without me. I just thought it was about time I moved on with mine. I really didn't think I needed to check with you before I moved out. After all you didn't check with me before you moved out."

"That's not fair. You know why I moved out."

"Yes I do and that is the part of my life I am putting behind me now."

"I don't know why I am talking to you at all, I am so angry with you right now. I guess I still.... Well, I just wanted to know why you suddenly moved out."

"Why are you so mad at me now? And what were you going to say You guess you still... what?"

Abby said, "I don't think I want to talk about that now. It would only make things worse."

I said, "Well, thanks for calling.

Abby said, "When will I see you again?"

I said, "In a few months, after I make Junior Partner. As soon as I get that out of the way we can proceed with our divorce. I guess the next time I'll see you is when we meet to work out our settlement. That will make you happy won't it."

Abby said, "I guess it will be good to have that out of the way. I hope your promotion turns out to be worth the cost."

I said, "So do I... I'm sorry Abby... I..."

"What are you sorry about?"

Talking to her was so painful. Part of me was still in love with her but the other part of me could only see her as the Abby I saw in the video sucking on Ben's cock. I didn't think I could ever get that image out of my head.

I said, "I'm sorry but I have to go now. I am late for a meeting."

"Okay Mike, I get the message. When did you become such a cold son of a bitch. Is that the lawyer in you or is this just reserved for me? I guess you better run off to your meeting. Good bye Mike."

"Good bye Abby."

I could not say why but I was sure that Abby never got yo the real reason for calling me. There was something else on Abby's mind but for some reason she decided not to share it with me. The overall tone of the call was not friendly, but that was partly my fault and may be what changed her mind. I wished I had handled the call better. I wondered what she was she so pissed at me about and was that the real reason for the call? I wondered if I was better off not knowing what was really on Abby's mind.

For the next two months I kept myself so busy that I hardly noticed the time passing. Then on the first Monday in May my promotion to Junior Partner was announced. It was a big day for me, I was given a substantial raise, my own office with a view of Lake Michigan and I had achieved my first goal and was on my way up. I was looking ahead to the day I would become one of the Senior Partners. All the hard work finally paid off.

That night I went out to celebrate with several members of the firm. During the party I struck up a conversation with one of our paralegals named Sarah O'Leary. I knew Sarah from the office but I had never really talked to her before. Sarah is an attractive redhead, about five feet six inches tall with green eyes and a friendly smile, which was what I needed that night.

During our conversation I told Sarah that I had separated form my wife and planned to file for divorce in a couple of months. I didn't give her any details of the separation because it was still to painful for me to talk about. She told me she was divorced and unattached and liked it that way. We talked so long that we didn't noticed that everyone else had already left the party.

I didn't want Sarah to leave so I said, "I guess it's just you and me now, Would you like to see if we can get a table in the restaurant and have dinner.?"

Sarah said, "I'd love to."

We picked up our drinks and went into the dining room. During dinner I started to wonder what it would be like to make love to Sarah. I actually began to wondered about her red hair. I felt a growing erection in my pants as I imagined myself removing Sarah's panties to see if she was a natural redhead.

I had overcome the shyness of my college years and was now comfortable in most business and social situations but I was still uneasy talking to Sarah. If fact it was Sarah that had approached me earlier in the evening. If she hadn't approached me I would already have been home in my apartment making myself some macaroni and cheese from a box.

I wanted more that evening than to just having dinner with a beautiful woman. I wanted to make love to Sarah but even though I was extremely aroused by the thought of bedding Sarah, I had no idea how to even begin to try and seduce her. After all, I had never in my life seduced anyone. I was having difficulty making myself do what would be necessary to give me a chance with her. Abby was still the only woman with whom I had ever had sex and it had been several months since I last made love to her.

I was so nervous that my hands were sweating but I was determined to at least try, so I took a swallow of my scotch for nerve and then said, "Sarah, after dinner would you like to go someplace else with me?"

She said, "Sure, where do you want to go?"

I felt my mouth go dry as I said, "How about we go back to my apartment for a drink."

Sarah smiled at me and said, "I'd love to and I am hoping for more than just a drink."

After a good meal and a bottle of wine Sarah accompanied me back to my apartment. When we got the apartment I poured us each a glass of wine. Sarah took her glass and sat down on the sofa while I put on some music. On the shelf above my CD player I had set a picture of Abby. I don't know why I still had this picture, it made me sad every time I looked at it. I guess I kept it because it was the only one I had I just could not bring myself to throw it away. Even with the lovely Sarah sitting on my sofa the picture was still able to bring me down. I thought I had come to terms with losing Abby, so why did it still effect me that way.

I began to wish that I had not brought Sarah home with me because now I wasn't in the mood for sex. I went and sat next to Sarah and while I was searching for the words to explain to her how I was feeling, Sarah kissed me and flicked her tongue across my lips. I felt myself responding to her and when she kissed me again I was ready to go. I kissed her back and she slid down on the sofa with me on top of her and all feelings of sadness were gone.

I pulled Sarah's top off and soon had her soft breasts in my hands and mouth. As I sucked on her nipples, Sarah made little mewing sounds in her throat. Sarah's breathing became heavier as I continued to tease her hard nipples with my tongue and as I slid my hand up under her skirt Sarah spread her legs farther apart. When my hand reached her crotch I could feel the dampness of her arousal right through her pantyhose. I pressed my hand against the center of her sex and massaged her pussy right through her pantyhose. When I removed my hand Sarah got up off the sofa removed her pantyhose.

As she was pulling her pantyhose down she said, "If I had known I was coming home with you tonight I would not have worn these. Hell I might not have worn panties either."

Sarah stepped out of her pantyhose and dropped them on the floor and then she unzipped her skirt and let it drop in a puddle around her feet leaving her in just her sexy red panties. Then she sat back down on the sofa

After kissing her on the mouth several times and spending some more time loving her breasts I moved down and began to kiss my way up her inner thighs until I reached her panties. I pulled the crotch aside to discover that Sarah was indeed a natural redhead. She had a large triangle of soft fluffy red hair on her pubic mound. I pressed my face into her hair and inhaled her scent and then I ran my tongue over her vulva causing Sarah's hips to move involuntarily.

As I began to probe Sarah's honey pot with my tongue she took my head in her hands and pulled me tighter against her. When Sarah's orgasm started I was afraid that the people across the street knew about it. Sarah kept yelling "I'm coming, I'm coming," all through her orgasm and the whole time she was humping my mouth and her juices were running down my chin.

I gave her pussy so much oral attention that my mouth actually got tired so I stood up and removed my clothes and as I came back to the sofa, Sarah took my rock hard member in her hand and pulled it toward her face. I moved in the direction she was pulling, as if I had a choice, and Sarah took me into her mouth. I stood there looking down on her pretty face as she worked my cock in and out of her mouth and I had a flash of the image of Abby sucking on Ben's cock and felt another moment of sadness but then I looked at the downy red hair between Sarah's legs and all I wanted to do was get my cock inside her.

When Sarah let my throbbing cock slip from her mouth I took her hand led her to my bed. Sarah got on the bed and I climbed on after her and began kissing her as my cock searched for her moist opening. It didn't take long for me to find her warm wet hole and slid my cock deep inside her. We bounced around the bed, slowing and then speeding up, trying to prolong the pleasure as long as we could until I finally exploded inside Sarah, spewing my seed deep inside her.

Afterward I felt great for about five minutes, and then the sadness start to creep back into my psyche. Rather than let it beat me I just pulled Sarah closer continued to explore her body with my hands and mouth. We made love until we both feel asleep.

When I woke up the next morning I felt better but wasn't sure where the previous night of sex was leading me. I shook Sarah gently to wake her and told her she could take a shower while I fixed us some breakfast.

By the time she came out of the shower I had made bacon and scrambled eggs and a pot of coffee.

Sarah said, "Wow, and he can cook too."

I laughed and said, "Bacon and eggs isn't exactly cooking."

Sarah said, "Listen, I had to leave my ex written instructions on how to boil water."

I said, "It couldn't have been that bad."

Sarah said, "In the five years we were together he never cooked anything. Except maybe toast and I think he burned that."

As I handed her a cup of coffee Sarah kissed me and said, "Last night was great."

I agreed with her and we sat down and ate our breakfast. Immediately after breakfast Sarah took a cab to her apartment to get dressed for work.

I got to the office at nine o'clock and Sarah was already there. She smiled at me but didn't say anything as I passed. When I walked into my new office my new secretary followed me in and handed me a package.

She said, "This came for you late yesterday. Also, you have a meeting at ten o'clock with Mr. Madison to discuss the class action suit against Weldon Pharmaceutical.

I examined the package in my hand. It was gift wrapped and had my name on it but there was no indication where it came from or who sent it. I sat down at my desk and unwrapped it. Inside was a box and a gift card. The card read "Congratulations on making Junior Partner." You gave up a lot for this job I hope it was worth it." The card was unsigned.

For the tone of the note I guessed that the gift had to have come from Abby. I wondered why she would send me a gift. Was the note truly congratulatory or was it sarcasm? I remembered that she had said something similar on the phone the last time we spoke. It was a riddle I couldn't solve so I put the note aside and turned my attention to the box. The gift turned out to be a very expensive pen and pencil desk sit. The plaque on the base was engraved with Mike Cooper Junior Partner May 7 2001.

I could think of no reason for Abby to send me a gift but I could think of no one else who would.

As I sat looking at the desk set I felt sad again and I couldn't shake it. Here I was starting my new job and I couldn't even enjoy the first day and it was Abby's fault. Abby was right though, I had worked very hard for this promotion but I was no longer sure that it was worth the price I paid.

How the hell did she know about my promotion the same day it happened? I suspected that someone in the office was feeding Abby information about me, but who and why?

Over the next four months a definite trend had developed. The job was going great. I was being handed a lot of high profile cases that generated a lot of money for the firm and for me. Sarah and I were getting together for dinner and sex two or three times a week and I was becoming more depressed and unhappy everyday. The only time I wasn't depressed was when I at work. The depression wasn't as bad when I was with Sarah but it was still there and when I wasn't with Sarah or working I could not keep visions of Abby out of my head. Sometimes they was happy memories but most of the time I was mentally replaying the tape of Abby having sex with Ben.

The love I had held for Abby was slowly turning bitter and a part of me was beginning to hate her. I blamed her for my depression.

In time even my job began to lose it's luster. I was working even harder than I was before the promotion and the cases were piling up on my desk. Most of my cases were big class action suits. I found that not all of these cases had merit but I managed to get sizable settlements for our clients and the firm, which made the Senior Partners very happy and made me a lot of money.

I began to miss the small cases that really helped people in need but because of my new position I was expected to drive a lot more revenue to justify my higher salary, bigger bonuses, and fancy office.

On top of everything else I was being haunted by the knowledge that I was going to have to start preparing the divorce papers to end my marriage. Just the thought of it would put me into a deep funk. Frankly it surprised me that Abby hadn't started the process herself. She didn't seem to care that legally we were still married.

When the depression was at it's worse I actually considered driving my car into the Chicago river and ending it all. But somehow I kept myself going. I knew then that I would have to change my life. I had to stop blaming my depression on Abby and just block her out of my life. I was determined to make myself whole again.