A WARNING AND A CHOICE
Work has been interfering with the completion of this story. It was written in fits and starts. Also, I had no idea how it would turn out.
Theo Martin and his wife Lill were headed back from dropping their three children off at State University. Todd, the oldest, was a junior there. The twins, Kate and Joan, were incoming freshmen. They'd rented a van, and Lill had driven their SUV behind it for the two hour trip. Theo dropped of the rental and all five went out to dinner at a nice American restaurant.
Everyone had a fine time. Maybe Theo was a bit subdued.
It was August and still daylight at eight pm when the parents drove away south, back toward home.
Both parents were a bit lachrymose. For twenty years they'd had children at home. Now the twins were off, at least partly on their own. They were pretty, but level-headed young women. But Theo worried anyway. However, on that particular drive, his kids were not foremost on his mind.
About thirty minutes into the drive, Theo changed the subject from the family and empty nest to.....to a direct warning to his spouse.
"Lill, I want to say right now that there are no circumstances under which I would tolerate infidelity. None." It was a statement delivered flatly, with little or no affect.
Theo was driving. He heard Lill gasp. That gasp surprised him a little. Lill was a seasoned lawyer, a prosecutor, not given to displays of weakness. But Theo's statement had rattled her. Lill had been well on the way toward a sexual affair with a younger man who worked as an investigator in her office - Troy Block. She and Troy had been involved at first in a flirtation, when he came to work for the firm six months before. But it had blossomed from harmless to intense. And....she had plans to see him for sex that Tuesday evening, covered by her normal girl's night out.
Troy was thirty, tall, blond and cut, with long hair worn tied back. About a month before the university trip, he had given Lill a 'burner' phone, solely for their own use. He had also started showing up at the Tuesday functions, at a local bar. Lill's three normal companions on her GNO's were surprised at first. But now they'd become used to Troy. He was fun and so sexy. And he danced with all four women. But it was Lill who got the most attention.
Nevertheless, none of the women mentioned Troy to their husbands.
When she heard Theo's statement in the car, Lill was shocked. She didn't respond immediately. When she calmed a bit, she said, "Neither would I, Theo."
Theo also took a few long seconds to respond.
Then he said, "Troy Block."
Another gasp. Less obvious, but he heard it. Lill was now floating on a sea of uncertainty. Theo, who was supposed to be in the dark, apparently knew a lot. But how much? And how did he find out? She and Troy had not had sex. A few kisses out back of the bar.
Lill replied, "I haven't done anything with Troy. How did you....?"
"How did I find out? Never mind that. I want to know why, Lill, after all this time?"
Lill replied with some heat, "I told you nothing's happened."
Theo shot back, "Hyatt Hotel Regency. Tuesday."
Those words prompted Lill to abruptly turn away, toward her passenger window. But soon she spat out, angrily, "You've been spying on us.... I mean on me. How could you?" An ambiguous question. Mainly she wondered how he could know about the hotel.
"You mean I should play the role of clueless cuck? Not happening. If you go through with your plans, the marriage is over. It may be over anyway."
"We...we've been so long together. The kids. Jesus! We...they're still young. It would affect them. Especially the girls."
Theo said, "I haven't made this situation. All on you, my dear. I'll say this, if you ghost the guy and agree to go to counselling, maybe we can continue. Maybe."
Lill thought about that. She did indeed want outside sex. She thought it would be so great. It was what she needed at her age. A cure for middle-aged empty nest blues. But no way would she risk it all for that. Well, it was unlikely but not impossible. She loved Theo and the kids. But...
She said, "Okay. I can disengage with Troy. But, you know, he will still be at work. You'll spy on me, right?"
"Yes. I don't trust you, Lill. That's one main reason for counselling. I don't want to live having always to be alert to betrayal."
"How did you...?"
"You really don't need to know that. You've not considered all of it, or you wouldn't have asked."
Theo had found her burner phone in the back of an underwear drawer in the bedroom. He'd
looked for it because she'd been acting oddly and he'd seen her putting something in there one evening when he came up the small, rear staircase. She had not noticed. There were revealing texts on the phone, as well as numerous calls to one number. Mostly the calls were on weekends. Some evenings.
Lill said, "Right. Right, I see that. Fuck."
"Do you work directly with this guy?"
"No. I did, but that case is over. But I don't make assignments for investigators. Perry does." Perry was her boss.
"Ask him to keep a separation."
"I can't. He'll ask why."
"Tell him. You want to avoid problems that could arise."
"I just can't. We only have three people on staff for that stuff. I can simply cut it off with Troy. He won't....persist."
"And if he does? He might, you know."
"I'll threaten him."
They were inside the house now. Theo took his overnight bag upstairs. Lill didn't follow. She put on some coffee and sat to ponder her predicament.
When Theo came back down, he poured a cup for himself. He said, "I made an appointment for counselling with a woman, Marge Davenport. She's well thought of, I hear. It's for Tuesday at seven-thirty - after work."
He handed her a card with Ms. Davenport's name and address on it.
Lill said, "That was presumptuous of you, Theo."
He said, "Maybe. I give you the choice. You show up at her place, or you don't. If you don't, well, that'll simplify my choice."
That was Sunday afternoon. The rest of the day was spent without much discussion of anything at all. Theo worked in his office on a new book. His hobby. None of his efforts had made much of a splash yet.
Lill did some research on Ms. Davenport and found that she'd be acceptable. She also did some research on the effect of mid-life divorce upon the children and the spouses. She did not like what she discovered. No one won. In their case, both made very good money. Each could afford the divorce. But the children would likely be damaged.
Sunday at ten pm both were washed and in bed.
Theo was reading a mystery novel.
Lill said, "I looked into the therapist. She seems okay. But...I mean, I..."
"You what? What I hope is that I can get some assurance that you'll be a faithful wife. That would involve an explanation - an honest explanation - of why you were planning to cheat."
'He's hot and I....I feel old."
"So, you're willing to risk it all, so you won't feel 'old?'"
"You wouldn't just go. After all these years."
"Really? You believe that? Except, after all these years, you want more. We made our promises. You broke yours."
"Not yet. I didn't yet."
"A matter of opinion. I believe you did. By setting it all up."
"Okay. Okay. Sorry."
"I get the feeling that you're not committed any longer. Perhaps we should simply cancel and end it."
"You would do that? Really?"
"Yep. I feel betrayed. And you don't give a shit about that. I can see it. That's the problem with a long marriage. People get to know each other."
"I...I absolutely do not want a divorce." Her statement was devoid of emotion, though.
"But you want to fuck around. Can't do both...marriage and screwing around. I'll say this, I want an absolute promise from you that while we work on this, you won't sneak around on me."
"Okay."
"Okay what? Jesus."
"I promise." Now there was a bit of annoyance there. Exasperation, almost. She felt him stiffen up. She knew why.
She said, "I love you, Theo. I do." This was delivered with some depth.
He turned and looked at her, said nothing.
"I mean it. I love you."
He nodded and turned to go to sleep. It was already past his bed time.
The two of them went through the motions Monday and Tuesday. Off to work, almost as if nothing had occurred. But not much interaction. Sleep in the same bed with no contact.
Tuesday after work, they ate delivered pizza and Theo started toward the door. Lill came along with him. She had pondered her choices. Her main goal was to save the marriage. But a subsidiary goal was to have....a fling or two. She was undecided about whether to sneak around, or to insist. She regarded the counselling sessions as an opportunity to bargain.
On Monday, Lill cancelled the tryst with Todd. The two of them met over lunch at an out of the way Mexican place where they had some privacy.
Todd was not in love with Lill. Nor she with him. But they did have quite a mutual sexual attraction. Lill was very attractive, medium height, lush figure, deep brown hair and eyes.
Lill said, "Theo knew all about our plans. Including the hotel. That's why I cancelled."
Todd thought about that and said, "The phone. He found it. That's the only way."
Lill nodded. "I thought about moving it. Then I didn't."
"We can get another. Use the first as a decoy."
Lill smiled. But she said, "I cannot risk it now. Maybe....I don't know. I have to give it some time. It isn't as if you'll go without."
Todd said, "No. But we have...we have something between us. You know it."
Lill nodded again. "So what? I'd end up living alone. And old and ugly. Anyway, I love him, and I'm used to him."
"Maybe he wouldn't leave you. If you set up a weekend for us and told him. That would be it."
She smiled at the thought. But she shook her head no. "Not time now. And no sneaking. Sorry."
Todd sighed and finished his burger. They went back to the office.
THEO
Theo was not optimistic about the marriage counseling. Two things occurred to him. One - the burner phone had been active for over two weeks. That spoke volumes about Lill's intent, and about whether she could be trusted.
Two - Lill's sex drive seemed to be ramping up as she reached her mid-forties. It was all Theo could do, sometimes, to keep up with her.
The combination of her slyness and her intense libido made it seem unlikely to him that she would resist temptation.
And, since it did seem unlikely, Theo was faced with the task of constantly monitoring her. Either that, or just let it happen.
He also had to decide whether to lay all these thoughts out at the marriage counseling. He decided to react - decide based on what happened.
LILL
