Warning: There is relatively no sex in this first chapter, only innuendo of what is to come. I'm merely introducing the characters and rolling out the plot. If the story is received well and interest is shown, I'll proceed to at least a second chapter, who knows?
The new family business - A short story by Jacques Boncoeur
It really is difficult to know where to start. The beginning would be just as unbelievable as the end. Even I can't believe it, so I suppose I'll have to follow the usual trend and tell you something about my family. My name's Robbie and I'm forty-seven years old. I married the love of my life, Suzanne twenty six years ago when we were both twenty-one. We have two daughters, Molly who is twenty-five and single and Laura who is twenty-four and has just had her first anniversary. The final actor in my family story and the fulcrum of the events that have recently occurred is my elder brother by two years, Gordon. You might have guessed by our names that we are Scot's by birth although that has nothing to do with my story.
Despite being the elder, Gordon has by no means been a good role model. Throughout our lives he has got himself and me in more trouble than I care to think. I've been in more fights that I can number that have been started by my dear brother and I've always seemed to have carried the can either with the blame, or the injuries gained and I've spent more time apologising for his conduct usually when he is long gone from the scene of his crimes. Nevertheless I love the guy and I suppose I've always admired his happy go lucky thoughts on life.
Of course over the years Gordon hasn't reformed, to the point where our parents, family and friends have just come to accept that's how he is. Some of the 'friends' he's brought home are really way out and things got to a head when our Mum caught him fucking her 67 year old sister over the back of Dad's favourite armchair, while she was busy munching on one our mates dick. Family re-'unions' were never quite the same after that.
To my knowledge he's come on to Suzanne at virtually every opportunity, even right in front of me. 'You don't mind if I fuck Suzanne senseless, Robbie', he often says as he comes into the house without knocking or invitation after months of not hearing from him. He then gropes her tits or thrusts a hand up her dress whilst almost swallowing her face with his kisses. He doesn't do this in fun mind, he is completely serious and it is only that Suzanne firmly pushes him off. At this point he just continues, as if he's just asked for a cup of tea and his actions are what everyone does. Suzanne just accepts it and never complains. I think she loves him just as much as I do.
Anyway, back to my story. Last Friday at about ten in the evening the phone rang and it was Gordon. I had answered it and without any pre-amble Gordon said, 'Thank God you answered Robbie, I'm in the shit. I need you to line up some whores for me.'
I'm so used to this type of dialogue with my brother that I hardly took a second to answer. 'I don't know any whores Gordon, so how can I line them up?'
'Of course you do, Suzanne's best friend Kathy and her two daughters are whores and I need them for a gang-bang next Saturday.'
I think by now you can tell I'm not easily shocked but this revelation that a woman and her daughters that virtually lived at our house did come as a bit of a surprise. But one thing my brother isn't it's a liar. If my brother says they are whores, they almost certainly are. 'Gordon, call back in half an hour and I'll talk to Suzanne,' I said lamely as I didn't want him to know what an idiot I was for not knowing. 'Ok sport, give her a good fucking from me, you lucky bastard'. And he rang off.
Suzanne of course had witnessed our conversation and noted my surprised visage. 'Gordon says that Kathy, Bev and Corinne are whores and he wants me to book them up for a gang-bang next Friday.' I tried to make it sound a run of the mill statement but the tremor in my voice let me down.
'Oh yes, you'd better see if they're available I suppose,' she said, as though I'd asked if they could come over to play bridge.
'Why didn't you tell me they were whores' I asked?
'Why on earth should I? That's there business and don't start getting on your high moral horse, it doesn't suit you.'
I seemed to be the one that was being cast as the culprit once again, so I tried to change tack. 'I'm not getting on my high horse at all. I'm just saying that it would be nice to know what sort of people we are entertaining.' Of course the tack I chose was completely the wrong one.
'You sanctimonious bastard, what do you mean 'sort' of people? They're our friends and they're my 'sort' of people. So, go sit in the other room when they're here if you don't like it.'
I could rapidly see that in her eyes I was slipping from my normal role as adoring husband to that of the local cesspit cleaner. So being a true artisan I dug a deeper hole for myself.
'I wasn't casting aspersions; it's just that you don't usually like that sort of thing.'
She got up, her eyes blazing pits of fire and virtually spat the words at me. 'You fucking bastard, if it wasn't for the fact that that I vowed never to give myself to another, I'd have been a whore years ago. At least I get more fucks than I do from you.' With that she stormed out of the room and slammed the door, leaving me covered in the purple haze of her indignation.
I was so stunned with what she had said and how all of the sudden I was the one at fault, that all I could think of was to phone Kathy. When Gordon called a few minutes later, I told him that Kathy wanted three thousand pounds for the three of them for the evening.
'No good Robbie, that's what I'm charging for setting it up. Two thousand smackers top line. You'll have to haggle mate. I'll call you back in ten minutes.'
Ten minutes later when Gordon called back, I was not only a procurer but I'd also negotiated a discount.
I meekly made my way up to bed and tried to make things up with Suzanne. She was laying with her back towards my side of the bed. If the heat from her eyes had not lacked in intensity then the frost coming from her now caused me to shiver. 'Darling, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to be judgemental or moralistic. I was just surprised. They are our friends and always will be. I've even phoned Kathy up and made the arrangements. And I really mean it. It's the oldest profession in the world and even if you wanted to do it I wouldn't stand in your way.'
She turned over and looked at me, wiping the tears from her eyes. 'Yes, and pigs might someday fly.'
'No I mean it,' I said. 'It's as good as any job and no matter what you did I'd support you and be proud of you.' Of course, I never thought anything would come of it and I'm sure neither did she. What fools we are that tempt fate.