Writer's note: We've taken a few liberties, but this is our true story. We are forever grateful for all the assistance from
meathead96,
who so kindly edited this piece.
*
At that moment you could have knocked me over with a feather. Out of nowhere and moments after we had finished making love my wife of 30 years asked me if I still had a fantasy of her sleeping with another man. But why, 25+ years after first bringing up the subject and 20+ years after giving up on my fantasy ever becoming reality, was she bringing it up now?
After stuttering a whispered "yes", I reminded her that my fantasy was to "watch" her with someone else. And then I asked, "And what resurrected this subject?"
Deep down I had a feeling what the answer might be. Several years ago a medical condition required me to take a blood thinning medication for the rest of my life. Poor circulation and my medication made any erections difficult and maintaining one long enough to please my wife was impossible; and ED medications are strictly forbidden for my medical situation too. We had long given up trying conventional sex and had settled on oral sex for her and masturbation for me.
Her long silence caused me to ask a question. "Do you miss having a dick inside of you?"
"A little bit," she said. "I have tried to be happy with oral sex, playing with toys or masturbating but I've really missed having regular sex during the last year."
I was no longer lying on my back, and now I was on my side with my elbow to the mattress and my hand supporting my head. Her eyes were glued to the ceiling for fear I thought; she likely couldn't express her feelings if she looked directly at me.
She continued, "I was OK the first year, but I've been missing it more and more since then, and the last year has been really difficult Tom. I have never been with anyone but you and I know I've always told you I'd never do something like this, even though it was your fantasy, but for some reason I can't get the idea out of my mind."
Sheepishly she turned her head toward me for the first time, looking from the corner of her eyes to gauge my reaction. I didn't want her to feel too uncomfortable after sharing this with me so I quickly leaned towards her and kissed her as passionately as I could, for as long as I could. Even as shocked as I was I knew that maybe, just maybe my fantasy had life after all and I certainly did not want her to feel badly about herself.
Mel, short for Melody, has been my wife and life companion for 30 years; we have been through all of life's ups and downs, but together we have weathered the storm. And for a woman in her mid-50's she still looked great. A curvy size 12, she stood 5'8" tall and had the most perfect set of 38D's I've ever seen. She was definitely aging well in most anyone's book and I am still excited anytime another man finds her attractive too.
When our kiss finally broke Mel said, "Please don't get your hopes too high Tom. I know I could not sleep with someone else if you were there; at least not the first time. And I don't think I could be like the wives in the stories you used to read to me; the ones that have sex with strangers. But I think I would like to go on a date with someone, get to know them and see what happens. Is that too weird Tom?"
"It is not weird to want sex dear; it is a healthy, normal thing. I'm just sorry I can't give that to you anymore. Whatever you decide is fine by me. All I ask is to know that you are safe, that
we
will remain OK and to hear about it afterwards...... Agreed?"
"Yes," she said. "I will be safe and I won't do anything to jeopardize us. And I promise to tell you as much as I can...... I love you."
"Love you too dear."
Strangely during the next day, Sunday, the previous night's discussion did not come up. Also strange that day was nothing felt awkward between us. It was just another average Sunday of breakfast at home and a relaxing day around the house. The subject did keep running through my mind however. How would we find someone to whom she would be attracted to and what did she mean by "date"? But I was not going to raise my questions until she started the conversation.
And that happened after dinner on Tuesday night. Mel joined me on the sofa and said, "Honey, can we talk again? I have been thinking about Saturday night again and I want to be sure you know how much I love you. It is not your fault that I am feeling the way I'm feeling. I won't do anything if it is going to make you upset, but can we try to find someone?"
The "we" did not escape my attention, so again I tried to be as encouraging as possible. "Honey, I think you should do this. Do you have someone in mind or would you like some help finding someone?" I asked.
"I don't have anyone in mind, but I think we should just let it happen naturally. You know, just meet someone when we are out or at a party or something and let things progress from there. If we looked for someone on the internet I fear their expectations would be too high and I don't want to rush this. I don't want to feel slutty or bad about myself if we do this."
"We should do this however
you
want to do this, sweets," I said. "I think we can make this fun. Maybe we should start going out more again; possibly resurrect our Friday night date night." Her head was nodding up and down in obvious agreement so I continued, "Maybe some dancing would make you feel more comfortable."
"Good idea. It would I think," she said.
"OK, let's plan on meeting Friday night after work. We can have a few appetizers, a glass of wine and some dancing; we'll just see what happens," I said. It appeared we had a plan and I loved the liberal use of the word
we.
She was looking at this as something for us, not just herself, and I was going to do anything I could do to facilitate that. All this planning had even brought a bit of life to my groin.
But by Friday morning our plans started to fall apart. Mel sent me a text that morning; an old business colleague of hers who is also a friend of ours was in town and wanted to meet that night. I sent a text back to her asking the time and place, figuring our
date night
was put on hold for another week. But the rest of the morning passed and then moved into later afternoon, yet still no response had come. That was not unusual with all the meetings Mel could have in a day. Finally at 5pm I sent a second text asking her where and when we were meeting our friend Al.
Her response at 6:30pm gave me a chill. It read "
Sry been busy 2 day. Mtg Al at 7. I'll text later."
All of the sexual discussions must have sent my mind into overdrive. A time, but no place? Obviously she was meeting him alone. She wouldn't, would she? Naw, it was just my overactive mind and nothing sexual would happen with such a dear, old friend like Al. She wouldn't pick someone who was that close to us.
Or would she?
Another text came after their cocktail hour meeting had started
"Al says Hi. U guessed he's my choice?
Last chance
u sure? Respd b4 8p".
OMG, she
had
chosen Al. No discussion, now warning and no "we". She had chosen a friend of more than twenty years to be the second person in her lifetime that she'd make love to. I was mad, hurt and anything but excited at that moment, but one thing I had learned in life was restraint of tongue and pen. Don't overreact; give yourself a moment to gather your thoughts and avoid saying or writing something you'd regret later.
I sat on our front porch for a moment with my thoughts and to plan my response. I didn't want to wait too long, but what was my best response? And as I began thinking about her instead of me it became clear; I knew my wife well enough to know she could not do this with a stranger and she needed to have romance involved. I texted back,
"yes im sure. i love you. enjoy your night."
Moment's later Mel sent a text,
"love you too. not sure what he'll say. text u more later."
Wow, it had started; I wasn't sure that I had prepared myself for this, or at least in this way.
I received one more text about 10pm;
"great dinner. flirting with him; hes not sure what 2 do yet i think. but we going to a dance club now. good sign. sweet dreams."
My wife of 30 years was now a Hotwife? For some reason I hadn't thought of the prospect quite that way before; or it had not transferred from my fantasy, but that was my reality now.
And how long would it be before I knew what had happened? I drifted off to sleep for a few minutes, but awoke to the sound of Mel coming home at 2:30am. Quietly she came into our bedroom, undressed and slipped into bed. When I asked her how her night was she apologized for waking me and said she was really tired, asking if we could talk in the morning.