What does a cuckold feel when he sees his wife undressed? What kinds of thoughts go through his mind? What words does he read in her eyes when they are looking back at him, strong and confident? Strange questions, perhaps, but they are prompted by something unusual that happened today...
A gift from my wife's lover came in the mail.
Susan and Sean were on a vacation in Mexico. Susan made me use my vacation time to stay at home with the baby. Like many cuckolded men, I started this ball rolling, so I have no one but me to blame. Susan and I had a good life, and for all indications, she was comfortable with our sex life. I let the seeds of a fantasy grow, and was too thoughtless to think of the ramifications. The pain and disappointment I caused Susan is a story for another time. But the reality that unfolded for me was not the same as my fantasy. … First of all, my wife fell in love with Sean, her lover. Not lust, but love. Like wanting to spend all of her time with him. Like going on trips together-without me. Like insisting that he would be the father of her child...and worst of all, shutting me out of the bedroom. They all but banished me from the cuckold's major consolation: watching their lovemaking. I will never forget what my wife said as she closed the door on me:
"Sean said he is not interested in your sexual proclivities and does not intend to waste the time he spends with me by humoring you".
That was typical of Sean. Sometimes, the men who take our women are sadistic towards us, and sometimes they are friendly, but the man who took my woman seemed to ignore me completely... I was relegated to listening outside their door, and only when her lover left was I allowed inside to soothe Susan's pussy with my tongue. He always communicated what he wanted through Susan...and she seemed to have nothing but pleasing him on her mind... So it was a surprise to see a letter with Sean's writing addressed to me...I opened it with a great fear-maybe he would say that he was taking Susan away from me for good...
Instead, there was a note, and a picture:
“Dear cuckold; Hope you enjoy the picture. She is a beauty, isn't she? Sean”
It was a picture of Susan, on a bed in an expensive hotel room, naked, on her hands and knees. Her bottom, facing the camera, is inviting, sensually round but firm. I always told her she had a beautiful bottom, but she insisted she was too fat...she would never have allowed me to take a picture of her in that position, wouldn't even let me see her from the back without the lights out. Yet here she was, showing her ass proudly to the camera.
Her lover built up her confidence: She is looking back towards the camera - Her eyes seem to be saying:
" It took a real man to teach me about my body"
There was something about the position she was in those brought back good memories-memories of a long time ago. In another time, it used to be our favorite position. I felt my hands on her hips many times as I moved inside her...she used to say she could feel me more deeply that way, though she never came until after, when I would lick her pussy. I remember her looking back contentedly when we made love, and if I had only kept my fantasies to Myself, not pushed things, I might be thrusting inside of her right now, instead of trying to recall that increasingly distant pleasure... Thinking back on it, Maybe it was the fact that her look was just contented that fueled my cuckold thoughts. It seemed to me a woman being fucked should be in the “mad throes” of pleasure. Her eyes seemed to be saying:
"This is nice and comfortable-I am glad you are enjoying yourself..."
And that led to my destruction: She was a virgin when she married me-I always wondered if someone else with more than four and a half inches would have opened more pleasure in those eyes. And since she was a nurse, I worried that sooner or later she would discover the truth... Anyway, I couldn't let it go of all these thoughts, especially since they turned me on.
I am still looking at this picture, and I can’t help but wonder why Sean sent it. Maybe just to show me how much more confidence he has given her in her body, a confidence she never had with me. There is something else about her eyes, though.... I’ve seen that look before...
Ah, another memory...
It was the one time that I was actually allowed to watch her with her lover. Sean and Susan had been "together constantly" for two weeks-and it had been two weeks of dashed hopes for me, for I was shut out of the bedroom, and the experience that every cuckold dreams of.
I adapted as well as I could, and practiced the art of listening. Lying on the floor by the bedroom, I learned to listen to every nuance of lovemaking, The rustling of clothes and working of zippers, the pleasuring thrusts registered in the squeaks of the mattress, the sounds lips make on different parts of the body, the pounding groans of the bed and floorboards, and the degree of ecstasy revealed in each breath and moan.... My body was Transfixed as I lay on the floor... Twice I heard her voice rise and fall over his deep groans and the rhythmic pounding of the bed.... Then, a slowing down, and a few whispered words...I listened carefully but couldn't make them out. All of a sudden, Susan called my name and invited me in! After a moment of shock, I got up and walked towards the bedroom. As I opened the door, I thought, "this is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me". I turned to see the sight I dreaded and desired: My wife's lover was behind her, his face in a mask of pure conquest and pleasure. She looked back at him in adoration. They began to pick up their pace again, she was moving back to meet his thrusts, and I could see his huge tool alternately revealing its length, then plunging back inside her body. He held her rump tight and looked as if he was preparing for his second release. Her eyes opened wide with each thrust as if her body could barely contain what was happening.
That was the look I never saw when I was inside her! And I tell you I was so transfixed by that look that I wasn’t even aware that I had just come in my pants….
And at that moment, she turned to look my way and her gaze washed over me. Her eyes dropped for just a moment and a sense of shame washed over me-I felt like a lost little boy who had wet himself. I knew that she was comparing me with him-the cuckold and the conqueror-she looked at me squarely in the eyes and I will never forget what her look seemed to say:
"So this is what you are and what you will always will be. Look at me, and see what you have lost-for you will never be a man to me again."
