"How have you been holding up?" Jasmine asked as she sat down at the kitchen table and handed a cup to Elizabeth.
Elizabeth gave a tired smile and took a sip of the steaming coffee before replying.
"We have our good days and bad," Elizabeth finally replied with a sigh, "He still breaks down crying sometimes, but I think he's finally starting to accept it."
"Umm hmmm," Jasmine nodded, "How about you?"
Elizabeth smiled and shrugged, "I can still walk.
"I mean, financially we're struggling, but as soon as the house gets sold and SSI kicks in I think we'll be fine."
"And... how about you," Jasmine asked again.
"I'm... I'm not sure..." Elizabet replied.
"Elli, it's been a year since the accident," Jasmine said gently, "There's more that Josh will never be able to do than just walk."
Elizabeth took another sip of coffee while staring out the kitchen window at the light rain that had been falling since yesterday until a tear slipped down her cheek unnoticed. Jasmine waited patiently while watching her best friend since college. Elizabeth's hair was tied up in an untidy bun with whisps sticking out crazily, her cream bouse buttoned unevenly and covered in wrinkles. Jasmine's eyes found the small coffee stain on her friend's sweatpants from yesterday's breakfast when Elizabeth's shaking hands had slopped a little out of her cup. Elizabeth's skin had always been pale compared to Jasmine's dark nutmeg brown, but today it was as if she had never set foot out in the sun for years.
It broke Jasmine's heart to compare the smart, sexy woman from a year ago before the car crash that had so dramatically changed Elizabeth's life to the bag lady who sat across from her today.
"It's not all about... it's... it's selfish of me to think about that when Josh will never get to..." Elizabeth began before trailing off.
"It is not selfish to think about yourself!" Jasmine shot back, "If you want to be able to take care of Josh then you have to take care of yourself as well!"
"I've... I have my toys," Elizabeth confessed.
"Elizabeth," Jasmine replied softly.
"What!" Jasmine snapped, "You know what's fucking hilarious?
"Josh was so magnanimous, so fucking thoughtful, so full of his fucking self that he told me it would be Ok if I wanted to find someone on Tinder for fucks sake!"
"Fucking Tinder!"
Elisabeth broke down in sobs while Jasmine watched quietly for a moment before standing up and walking round the table to give her a gentle hug. After a few minutes Elisabeth's sobs subsided into sniffles and Jasmine kissed the top of her head.
"I didn't know he had given you permission," Jasmine whispered while holding Elizabeth.
"Oh, yea, right," Elizabeth replied with a hiccup, "I'm not sure which made me feel more guilty, that he said it would be Ok, or how much I wanted to find someone... anyone... just... just for an hour."
"It's Ok," Jasmine said and hugged Elizabeth tight before pulling a chair up close and sitting with her knees pressed against Elizabeth's.
"Do you... do you remember what we used to do in college?" Elizabeth asked in barely a whisper.
"I remember a lot of things we did in college," Jasmine shot back with a laugh.
Elizabeth smiled and sighed while staring down at her coffee cup for a moment before making eye contact with Jasmine.
"I... huh... I meant... do you remember when you caught me masturbating in our Sophomore year right after we became roommates?" Elizabeth asked.
Jasmine grinned at the memory of walking in on Elizabeth with her legs spread wide and a monster black dildo that looked like it had come from a horse and not a person pistoning between her legs. After Elizabeth had gotten over her horrified shock they had ended up sitting on the bed together talking about toys and sex and boyfriends. Jasmine remembered the soft touches, caresses and gentle kisses and how one thing had led...
"Oh," Jasmine said softly and looked up to see Elizabeth staring at her.
"I can't go on Tinder!" Elizabeth said, "Just assholes and losers, married guys wanting to cheat on their wives and single guys just wanting a one night stand and... I just can't!"
"I think a one night stand would be the point, wouldn't it?" Jasmine asked softly.
"I know right!" Elizabeth said with a sob while shaking her head, "But I still just... can't do that!
"And... and you've been there for me ever since the accident, supporting me when I didn't think I'd be able to go another day... maybe... maybe you could think about... about being there for me a little more?"
Jasmine felt her eyes go wide and her heart begin to race at just the thought of what Elizabeth seemed to be suggesting. All the nights they had ended up in the same bed in the tiny dorm room they shared flashed through her mind, all the ways they had found to pleasure each other, all the discoveries she had made about her own body while exploring Elizabeth's caused her to take a deep, shuddering breath.
"You don't have to say... you... you can just maybe think about it?" Elizabeth pleaded.
"I don't have to think about it," Jasmine whispered and leaned over to cup Elizabeth's cheek while she kissed her lips softly, "But you have the damndest timing!"
"Is it that time of month?" Elizabeth whispered with her lips still pressed lightly against Jasmine's.
"Noooo," Jasmine said and felt herself blush.
"Then what?" Elizabeth asked and pressed in for another long, slow kiss with her tongue pressing against Jasmine's.
Jasmine reached behind Elizabeth's head to pull her closer, their kiss quickly becoming harder and more demanding. Jasmine felt a hand stroking her inner thigh and clamped her legs together to capture Elizabeth's hand.
"Colby... um..." Jasmine whispered when they broke apart from their kiss.
"I thought Colby was at work?" Elizabeth asked, "Is he going to be home soon?"
