The Jackie Bailey Chronicles

Jacqueline Shaw grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere called, Kempton. It was the kind of town where everyone knew everything about everyone else. She lived with her father, Nathan Shaw, in a small beat-up house a mile outside of town. Her mother died of cancer just after her tenth birthday.

Nathan changed drastically after his wife died. He started drinking everyday, coming home drunk and depressed. He wasted her mother's life insurance on alcohol. He was constantly looking for his next fix of rum. When Jackie started filling out at thirteen, everyone noticed her blooming beauty, including Nathan. He started abusing her at the age of fourteen. Small gestures and touches grew into something more over time.

******

Jackie lay in her bed clutching the covers tightly around her skinny form. She heard the front door slam and a deep rumbling voice slurring down the passage, groaning and complaining about loss and the pain that stays afterward. Her bedroom door opened, creaking. The light from the passage snuck into her dark room. She lay with her back facing the door, not daring to move a muscle. A shadow of a swaying drunken father painted on the wall in front of her. The door slowly creaked shut letting the darkness envelope the tiny room again. She squeezed her eyes shut. The strong grip on her shoulder pulled her onto her back. The covers disappeared from her shoulders to her feet. The cold air gripped her frail body like a vice. She could hear the sound of a belt buckle and a zipper. She felt the bed shift as her father got onto it. The unbearable weight kept her from squirming and the smell of rum filled her senses.

Images of her mother filled her head: happy images filled with laughter, giggles and tickles. The smell of fresh flowers blooming in the garden together with the picture of her beautiful mother working in the garden put a small smile on her face. The images of her mother, with beauty fit for a princess, pulled young Jackie away from the horror every night. She slipped up behind her mother, soft and quiet. Her mother spun around to hug her tightly, a chuckle echoing from her soft flat belly under the tight t-shirt she wore.

"I love you, my sweetheart." Her mother's words sounded loud and clear in her ears. "I love you, Mommy." Jackie replied.

******

Jackie was startled out of her flashback by a voice next to her. "Excuse me Ms... another coffee?" the waitress asked.

Jackie answered by shaking her head, unable to clear the tightness in her throat. Finally finding her voice, she answered weakly. "May I have the bill please?" Jackie blinked her tears away. The waitress left her table to tend to another. Now, even at the age of thirty, the horrific memories still haunted her day and night. The only memories that kept her hanging on were those of her mother. The waitress returned a while later with the bill. Jackie placed a bill on the small plate under the receipt and handed it back to the waitress, smiling lightly.

"Keep the rest as a tip." The waitress looked at the bill and smiled broadly.

"Thank you, Ms, enjoy the rest of your day."

Jackie smiled and got up. She walked toward the restaurant door. As she opened the door another woman walked into her. Jackie stumbled backward and then felt an arm wrap around her waist. Her eyes shot up to meet two of the most amazing hazel eyes she had ever seen. Their gazes locked. The rest of the world seemed to disappear. Jackie smiled. She brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. "Sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going," Jackie said. She balanced herself and straightened her suit jacket and skirt, blushing furiously.

The other woman cleared her throat and let go of Jackie's waist. "No, it was entirely my fault. I was looking at someone behind me..." The woman trailed off, stunned by the beauty in front of her. Jackie looked up from her feet, her eyes following a firm built body in tight jeans, and a plain t-shirt hugging a flat tummy and firm breasts, then met those gorgeous hazel eyes again. "Can I make it up to you by inviting you for a drink?" the woman asked, pointing to a table in the restaurant.

"Sorry, I have to get back to work. If you come here often, we could make it tomorrow." Jackie suggested, smiling shyly at the woman.

"Yeah, of course, I'm here everyday at this time."

Jackie stepped aside to let the woman by. The woman stepped in the door and slid past her. She closed her eyes to take in the musk scent wafting up her nostrils from the dark haired woman. Jackie turned to leave, then stopped and turned, feeling a hand on her shoulder.

"What's your name?" the woman asked her, letting go of her shoulder. Jackie smiled again at the woman.

"My name is Jackie Bailey." The woman smiled brightly.

"I'm Shane Dickenson." Jackie raised an eyebrow at the woman. "I know... my father was hoping for a boy. So the name stuck." Shane crinkled her nose making Jackie giggle.

"Nice to meet you, Shane, see you around." Jackie held out her hand. Shane took her hand in her own. A spark ran through Jackie's hand from the other woman's silky soft touch. They smiled at each other as their eyes locked again. Jackie reluctantly let go of the warm soft hand in hers and turned around, smiling to herself.

At the end of the pavement, she looked back to see the woman still staring at her. Jackie turned back and crossed the street toward a three story accounting firm. At the double glass doors, she looked back again, smiled at Shane and disappeared into the building. Her heart was racing and her breathing was erratic. She took the elevator to the top floor. Exiting the elevator and walking into the office, she smiled at her friend and business partner.

"I'm back, Beverley, any messages while I was out?" Jackie stood in her own office door waiting.

"Nothing important Jackie, just a few clients confirming payments made for our services." Beverley smiled then turned serious.

"He called again, twice, looking for you." Beverley moved from behind her desk in her wheelchair. She had had a bad car accident a few years ago, leaving her legs totally numb and useless. Jackie's smile disappeared. A tear formed in the corner of her eye.

"What did Nathan want this time?" she asked Beverley with sadness in her voice.

"He didn't say, he just asked for you. When I told him you weren't in, he hung up." Jackie sighed as the memories threatened to take over her thoughts.

"I really should report him for violating his restraining order. Okay... thank you Bev, enjoy your lunch."

Jackie turned into her office, her head hanging low and her fingers working her temples. She sat down behind her desk, hiding her face behind her hands. "I'm having my lunch in today, so I will be here if you need me." Jackie dropped her hands to look at the woman in her doorway.

"Oh Bev, you really don't have to stay in for lunch. Go out for an hour and enjoy yourself. You're not my slave. I still don't get why you don't want anyone to know that you own half of the firm." Beverley chuckled and cocked her head to the side.

"I know... I just love working with you in secret. I don't like being in the spotlight. Besides, I ordered my lunch from the restaurant across the street before you got back. They brought it up for me."

Jackie smiled at her secret partner. "I'm really happy that I have you as my best friend and my business partner. You deserve to be named a saint. Now go eat and don't you dare do any work for the next hour." Jackie said sternly. She tried not to smile but couldn't help it. Beverley returned the smile, winked and then closed the office door as she left. Jackie sat back in her chair staring at the ceiling. Shane suddenly popped into her mind, kicking thoughts of Nathan out of the way.

Shane's tight jeans and snug t-shirt, both accentuating every curve in the right way, filled her mind. Jackie licked her lips and closed her eyes, remembering the soft and gentle touch of the woman's hand... Oh my god and her sweet musk scent; Jackie moaned unconsciously. She thought about Shane's full lips and hazel eyes. Her silky smooth short black hair hanging to just above her ear framed her face perfectly. The woman's face came into clear view: the gentle curve of her 'u' shaped jaw and her cute button nose. The smile that the woman gave her and the way her hazel eyes looked at her made Jackie feel special.

******

Shane sat at a table in the corner next to the window, staring at the accounting firm across the street. The big bright letters on the front of the building read: Bailey Accountants. It was the first time any woman had ever had such an effect on her. The image of the woman with the form hugging business suit and low heels had her in a lusting trance. Her tenderly curved 'v' shaped jaw, brown-green eyes, full red painted lips and small gentle pointy nose encased in long red curly locks had Shane drooling after her.

Shane remembered the shy smile and slight blush after they literally bumped into one another. Shane's hand still tingled from the spark she felt when they shook hands. A soft sweet and floral perfume still tickled Shane's nose. She knew that the powerful smell would never leave her memory banks. All her curves were in the right places. Shane sipped her drink then took the last bite of her lunch. She looked at her watch on her wrist. It's time to go.

Shane had a gym to open. She waved at the waitress for her bill. She turned to her right on exiting the restaurant. Five doors down the street she stopped to unlock her kick boxing gym. She stepped into her office in the back and sulked. She had too much paperwork to sort out. There were still boxes to unpack. Moving from Canada a month ago, away from her scowling family, hadn't been easy on her. She had left her whole life behind to start out fresh.

Shane had seen Jackie in the restaurant a few times before. The woman had worn a distant expression on her sweet features, a look of longing sadness reflecting loss, or even betrayal. The sense of deep unhappiness was reflected in her eyes. Jackie looked like she needed a friend, someone to help carry whatever load had created that sadness. Shane had felt impelled to talk to the redhead several times, walking up to her table to introduce herself, but always losing her nerve and continuing past. Today had been chance, perhaps even fate. Either way, Shane was pleased that she had finally talked to the woman that fascinated her, after a month of fruitless staring.

******

The hours passed by painfully as the day went on as usual. Jackie was checking books and answering the phone every few minutes. She took pride in her work; it was all she had aside from Beverley. The phone next to her laptop rang, startling her. She answered it without thinking. "Bailey Accountants, how may I help you?" She froze at the sound of the rough deep voice on the other end of the line. "What do you want Nathan? You aren't supposed to make contact with me." Her hands started shaking and her heart rate spiked. "I will call you whatever I bloody well feel like. My father is dead." She listened to the man who had once been her father. "No I am not giving you any more money. Now please stop calling me." She slammed the phone down, ending the call. Her face sank into her hands. She started crying. She sobbed uncontrollably.

After all these years her father still had the power to send her scampering for cover out of fear and shame. She switched everything off, grabbed her bag and coat and locked the offices. She was the only one left in the building except for the night security guard down in the lobby. Everyone else left at five o'clock. Jackie always stayed until six. She made sure everything was ready for the next day's morning meeting. She stepped out of the elevator into the lobby.

"Good evening Ms Bailey, have a good evening."

She looked up at the guard and smiled. "Hi James," She turned at the double glass doors. "How's the wife doing?" The young African American man gave her a gentle smile.

"She is pregnant and hormonal; I'm happy to be at work." Jackie chuckled softly.

"Good luck James. Give my love to Sarah, will you?" He chuckled and smiled brightly.

"I'll do that Ms Bailey, good night."

"Good night James." Jackie walked to her apartment around the corner of the block. The call from Nathan floated in her mind. He called her time and again, but only to taunt her or to ask for money so he could drink more rum.

******

Jackie dreamed that she sat alone under a great oak on a lonely hill under the moon and starlit sky, talking to her mother and praying. The fresh cool night air filled her lungs. She could hear little nocturnal creatures scurry about in the darkness.

Jackie and her mother used to have picnics under the great oak on sunny days. The oak tree was the only place she could find peace, any longer. Jackie sat quietly contemplating her options.

A vision of her mother stood in front of her. Jackie froze for a second; she couldn't believe what was happening. She remembered her mother from pictures she had. Her mother had never visited her before. Annabelle sat down beside her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. "Mommy... is it really you?" Jackie stared at the woman sitting next her... holding her. It felt good to feel those arms again.

"Yes it is my dear, but I'm not here to stay." Jackie thought about the statement for a moment.

"What are you here for Mommy?" Annabelle looked at her daughter with a smile.

"You were always the smart one. I am here to give you a message."

Jackie sighed, resting her head against the creamy shoulder. "I miss you Mommy." Annabelle kissed her forehead.

"I miss you too, my dear. You are a strong woman but there is a certain dark haired stranger out there who wants to be strong for you and love you and take away the loneliness. You have to let go of the pain. Only then will you be able to face your fears. Nothing that happened to you is your fault; it never was. I love you so much and I will always watch over you." Jackie kissed her mother's cheek.

"I think I know who you are talking about. I love you too Mommy."

The two women held each other one last time as the dream faded; leaving Jackie in a more peaceful sleep she had had in twenty years.

The next day, Jackie stepped into Beverley's office with a huge grin painted on her face. Beverley looked at the redhead. Her own smile grew into a grin. "Good morning Jackie, you look very happy this morning."

Jackie sighed happily standing in front of Beverley's desk. "Oh I literally ran into someone yesterday during lunch... Or should I say she ran into me. She almost knocked me off my feet but caught me just in time. Boy she has strong arms." Jackie walked toward the window behind Beverley's desk and stared at the restaurant across the street. Beverley knew about Jackie's past and knew that Jackie had become attracted to women as a result.

"So... tell me more... don't leave me hanging here." Beverley asked excited that Jackie had finally met someone who sparked her interests so strongly.

"We're meeting today for lunch, but I'm going to have to change lunch hours with you. Oh Bev, it's the first time ever that anyone has made me feel this nervous and happy for no reason. I don't know what to expect or what to do." Jackie turned to face Beverley with a look of apprehension on her face. Beverley wheeled herself from behind her desk.

"Why don't we go make some hot chocolate and talk in the break room? It sounds like you need a friend to talk to." Jackie followed Beverley to the break room in silence. They helped one another make the hot chocolate like so many other days when one of them needed a friend. Beverley sat beside Jackie, holding her cup in both hands in her lap.

"First of all Jackie, you need to learn to trust your judgement of people you meet. You have to let go of your past if you want a happy future. If you meet the right partner it won't be that difficult to face your nightmares. You have been trying to face all this alone for a long time." Beverley took a sip of her hot chocolate watching Jackie do the same. "Way too long, Jackie." The redhead was clearly thinking about what Bev had said. She leaned forward, elbows on her knees.

"You're right as always. You know me so well by now. Every time I meet someone, I shy away and run because of my fear, my living nightmare. The only person I ever let into my heart was you. I need someone to fill the empty part of my heart and soul that you can't." Jackie looked at Bev with a light smile. "No offence meant but you're straight and I need sex, the loving kind."

They stared at each other and burst out laughing at Jackie's admission. Jackie turned serious again. "I'm scared to let anyone else touch me. It brings back too many painful memories. I've tried; I can't even touch myself without cringing. I had a dream of my mother last night. We were sitting under the old oak tree I told you about. She told me to let go of my pain, then I will be able to let go of my fear. She also told me that there is someone waiting out there for me, a dark haired stranger."

"Sweetie, I agree with your mother. Just take your time to get to know this woman before you jump into bed with her. Give her a chance. You will know if she is the one to fill the empty spot in your heart." Beverley smiled holding Jackie's hand. Jackie gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks Bev, you are the world's best friend ever. Now, we have to get ready for this morning's meeting."

After the meeting was settled, Jackie spent the rest of her morning in her office as she worked her way through clients' books, making sure everything balanced. The closer it got to lunch time, the more her nerves rattled. Jackie was so into her work that she didn't even hear her office door open. Beverley sat in the door watching her friend pack herself to death in work. "I'm back, Sweetie." Beverley announced as she wheeled her way to Jackie's desk.

"Oh good god Bev, don't scare me like that." Jackie said with a nervous giggle. Beverley chuckled softly.

"Sorry, I didn't realise that you were that nervous over a lunch date." Jackie released a deep loud sigh.

"Is it that obvious?" she asked, looking at her friend.

"To anyone else who doesn't know you? No... I just know you too well to miss anything. Now get ready, you have a date with destiny." Beverley turned and headed for the door giggling.

"It's not a date, it's just lunch." Jackie said giggling at her friend.

"Oh I believe you. You're stalling, get going already. You'll never know unless you try." Jackie watched her friend disappear through the doors to her own office. She knew that Beverley was right; she was stalling. Jackie got up, grabbed her coat and headed out. Beverley watched as Jackie left, giving her a mischievous grin. Jackie just shook her head getting into the elevator.

When she reached the door of the restaurant, she felt her heart pumping wildly, skipping beats every few seconds. Her hand reached out for the door. She was shaking uncontrollably. She pushed the door open, took a deep breath and stepped over the threshold. She looked around the restaurant and spotted Shane sitting in a dimly lit corner on her own, drinking coffee. Jackie walked over very slowly.

Shane sipped her coffee and almost choked as she saw Jackie make her way over to her table. She stood up, grabbed a napkin and dabbed at her chin and lips. Jackie smiled sheepishly as their eyes met.

Jackie was wearing a black pants suit with a crisp white female cut button up shirt under her suit jacket. Her coat was thick, heavy and long, reaching down to her ankles. Shane looked down at the redhead's small feet, noticing that she was wearing black high heel boots, polished to a shimmering gloss.