The Healing of Eve

The next morning, we congregated around the breakfast table. Eve positively glowed. She came downstairs wearing the robe that we had provided for her, rather than her own clothes. "I hope you don't mind me borrowing this for a little longer," she said, "It's so comfortable and it seems more natural somehow."

"Of course not," Beth answered, "it's the only form of dress that Hazel and I wear when we're at home." Eve smiled gratefully and we sat down together to eat. We were all hungry, perhaps it had something to do with the exertions of the previous evening. Whatever the reason we ate well, happily watching the myriad of small birds that were attracted to our feeders. After we had finished, we took our coffee into the sitting room. Beth looked at her watch.

"Now would be a good time to call Dr Rose," she said, "If you are still OK with that Eve?"

"Yes, of course," Eve seemed more than happy.

"I'll make myself scarce," I said. So far we had only talked about Beth sharing the doctor's confidence.

"No, please stay, "Eve put her hand on my arm as though to prevent me leaving, "I have no secrets from either of you."

I looked enquiringly at Beth. "Stay Hazel," she said, "I'm sure we'll need your wise head."

Rose answered the call quickly and Beth put the phone into speaker mode. In answer to Rose' questions Eve confirmed that she was happy to discuss her confidential medical information with Beth and I. Beth came straight to the point. "What do you think is going on here?" She asked.

"I can only tell you what I told Eve," Rose' voice came clearly over the phone line. "Eve shows all the clinical signs of being pregnant. However, the embryo is not developing as it should. Under normal circumstances I would have said that pregnancy was not viable, and yet Eve's hormone levels are stable and consistent with a live embryo. I confess that I have never seen anything like this before, nor have I been able to find anything in the literature.

"Rose, we believe that Eve was impregnated during the great rite, at which you were present. Is that possible? Beth asked the key question.

"Medically? no its impossible," Rose was clear. "But I was present at the ceremony, and we all saw things that cannot be explained in purely scientific terms. If Eve's pregnancy was the result of the ceremony, then there is magic at work here." Rose paused, "There is a possible explanation," she continued, "not a medically sound idea, but a possibility nevertheless given the circumstances."

"Let's hear it," Beth said, "any notion is better than where we are now."

There was a long pause before Rose spoke again and her voice was more hesitant, as though her training as a scientist and a doctor prevented her from speculation, but finally she began to explain her idea.

"I wonder whether the embryo that has implanted in Eve's uterus has not been fertilised," she said. "Medically this can't happen, and it would even be wrong to call it an embryo at this stage, and perhaps that is the magic at work. You know of course that both male and female genetic material must come together to produce a baby, and, in this case, there was no male presence." There was a silence while the three of us tried to take this in.

It was Eve who spoke first. "Why didn't you tell me this when we met?" she asked.

"I'm afraid it hadn't occurred to me at the time. Eve, I have been thinking and researching since we met, trying to find a medical explanation for what's happening to you, but I haven't come up with anything that makes more sense than this."

"Supposing you're right, Eve said, "what are my options?"

Rose spoke gently, "That's a very difficult question," she said, "and you will need to think carefully about it and perhaps talk it through with Beth and Hazel before you decide what to do. The first thing you need to decide is whether you want to go ahead with your pregnancy. That's an enormous decision and only you can make that choice. If you did decide to go ahead, and I'm right about why you are not progressing, then we would need to find a way to fertilise what I'll call the proto embryo. That, in itself, would need a lot of thought, given the, shall we say, unique circumstances of the conception. On the other hand, terminating the pregnancy would be a relatively simple surgical procedure, which I would do here in my clinic. As I said, this is a big decision, and you need to think about it. I will say that I am unhappy clinically to leave you in your present state for too long. What is happening to you is not normal hormonally and we should try and move things one way or another within no more than fourteen days." Rose waited in silence for a few seconds to let this sink in before saying, "Is there anything you'd like to ask?"

Eve looked and Beth and me. I shook my head.

"Thank you Rose," Beth said, "may we call you again? We are sure to have more questions once we start to work this through."

"That goes without saying," Rose replied, "you can call at any time. Unless I'm with a patient there is nothing I won't interrupt for this and if I'm unavailable I will call you back as soon as I can."

We expressed our thanks, said goodbye and Beth hung up the phone. We were silent for a minute, each of us taking in what Rose had said. Beth took a sip of her coffee, "Ugh! It's cold," she grimaced.

"Too much excitement for coffee time," I smiled, "here, give me your cup, I'll make a fresh one." I was glad of the opportunity to move; it helped me think. I gathered up the cups and left Beth and Eve together while I went to wrestle with the coffee machine. When I returned, the conversation had not progressed far, but the short interlude had somehow lightened the atmosphere. We got down to business as I finished pouring the coffee.

"You have a big decision to make Eve," Beth said. Her voice was gentle, "we can help you, of course but this is a choice that you have to live with for the rest of your life, in one way or another."

Eve looked first at me and then at Beth, "I have been thinking about this ever since I realised that I was pregnant, of course I have. To tell you the truth I have hardly been able to think about anything else." I nodded; in Eve's position my head would have been spinning. "This has come out of the blue," she continued, "I'd be the ultimate single mother." She smiled, "and what would I put on the birth certificate as the father? I don't suppose Goddess will get me by." We laughed, "No I don't suppose it will," Beth smiled as Eve continued. "And it's a very simple procedure, I mean to terminate the pregnancy, Dr. Rose said so, and as she said, you can't really even call it a pregnancy can you?" It was a rhetorical question, Beth and I remained silent. "And yet... and yet, despite everything, I must try and have this baby," she blurted out, almost as though she were trying to convince herself. I looked up in surprise, it had seemed to me that she was talking herself into having a termination. "I can't help but believe that this was meant to be," she said, "it's not as if I got pregnant in the normal way, is it? I don't know what it all means but it can't be for me to decide to stop whatever the Goddess has planned, can it? She seemed to be seeking reassurance. I let Beth do the talking.

"Eve, you speak with a wisdom beyond your years," Beth said. "It is not given to us to understand everything that is ordained, but we must believe that ultimately the Goddess will lead us to the right path if we listen attentively and read the signs with love in our hearts. I do not confess to know the meaning or purpose behind what is happening to you, but I think you have made the right decision." I nodded my agreement and Eve looked relieved. "Hazel and I will be there to support you, and your child, and I am sure that the coven will want to make sure that you are financially secure, we are not without our resources, of that I am certain, so you need not worry on that score. But we have an immediate question to answer and that is, how to move your pregnancy on." Beth looked at me, "Hazel," she said, "is there anything written in the ancient Lore that might help us?"

"I know of nothing," I was sorry to have to disappoint them, "there are stories of virgin birth in many ancient cultures including ancient Greek and Chinese mythology and of course there is the Christian tradition of the immaculate conception of Jesus, but they hardly give a practical guide to action in the circumstances that we face. That does not mean however that the Lore does not contain anything, perhaps only that it is not an area which is commonly used or studied. Tomorrow I will go to the library of the Grand Coven and do some research. Our own library I am sure contains nothing relevant." I spoke directly to Eve, "Don't worry, I think you are right that this is meant to be, our way will be guided if we open ourselves to receive it."

With at least the semblance of a plan in place, we finished our coffee, put on our warmest clothes, and went out for a long and frosty walk before Eve left to return home. I spent the rest of the day sorting things out so that I would have at least the next couple of free days to spend in the cavernous library of our mother coven. I arranged to stay overnight with an old friend who had been the lore mistress of a small coven not too far away from the library, it being at least a two-hour train journey to the city and I judged it better to spend that time over my research, rather than in travelling.

And so it was that on the following morning I found myself in the hallowed halls of the central library of our craft, the familiar smell of wax furniture polish and musty old paper which had accompanied me on many a foray into the ancient wisdoms strong in my nostrils. I started my work in the vast index, unbelievably the majority of which was still held in the form of small white cards in a vast array of small wooden drawers. It was painstaking, detailed work and although I found one or two promising leads which had me burrowing in the dusty shelves of manuscripts, by the time the library was ready to close for the night I was dispiritingly no wiser than I had been when I started eight hours earlier.

Dusty, tired and a little downhearted I set off for Jenny's flat, where I was to stay for the night. It was only a short walk from the library and by the time I rang the bell on her bright red door I was in a more positive frame of mind. I had another day at least in the library and an evening with Jenny was always going to fun. In response to my ring Jenny opened the door in characteristic good humour, dressed in a sky blue robe with a red spotted apron tied around her middle, she had what appeared to be a dusting of flour on the tip of her nose. She greeted me enthusiastically and threw her arms around me in a welcoming hug.

"Just whipping up some flatbread to go with dinner," she called over her shoulder as she headed for the kitchen. The delicious smells that wafted down the hall from that very room made me realise how hungry I was. I had worked without a real break all day, so intent was I on making some progress in my search for information. I dumped my small bag by the door and followed Jenny into the Kitchen. She was busy kneading away at a ball of dough that looked big enough to make several loaves of bread. The neat kitchen was warm and welcoming and there were already a couple of colourful dishes waiting on the table, covered in plastic wrap. I could see seared cauliflower, butternut squash, roasted tomatoes, pomegranate seeds, coriander leaves and lime zest. Every now and then, Jenny stopped kneading and took a sip from a large glass goblet in which ice cubes and lemon floated on the surface of a clear liquid.

"Fix yourself a G & T she said," gesturing with a doughy hand towards the group of bottles in the corner of the work top. "Or there's wine in the fridge if you'd rather."

I looked at the one-woman whirlwind that was Jenny, bright blue eyes that were full of laughter and the pale face covered with freckles. We had been friends for years and although we saw each other rarely, she never seemed to change. It lifted my spirits to just to see her.

"Can I go and change first?" I asked. I was feeling grubby from the dusty work in the library and it would give Jenny a chance to finish her bread making.

"Course you can," you're in the room on the left, where you normally are. "Want a shower? There's plenty of hot water, towels in the cupboard, anyway you know where everything is."

"That would be perfect," I nodded and leaving Jenny to her gin and breadmaking I headed for the shower.

I stripped off my day clothes in the cosy bedroom and stepped into the shower. The cascade of hot water and the delicious, scented oil that Jenny had thoughtfully left in the shower soon washed away the dust and grime that the furthest recesses of the library had deposited on me. I could easily have stayed there longer but, conscious of being a considerate guest, I dried myself with the luxurious white towel I had picked from the cupboard, slipped into a simple house robe and padded barefoot downstairs, feeling refreshed but now hungrier than ever.

By some miracle Jenny had the bread ready for the oven, the kitchen more or less tidy and her hands and face flour free.

"Mmm, you smell nice," she greeted the refreshed me. I put my arms around her and gave her a hug.

"You're just wonderful," I told her, "the food looks and smells amazing, and I'm starving."

"I'll put the bread in the oven, it's only going to take twenty minutes," she laughed. "Everything else is done. We'll have an aperitif while it cooks and then we'll eat. Wine alright?" I nodded. She took a rather nice bottle of white from the fridge and passed it to me. "Here," she said, "take the bottle through to the sitting room, the glasses are already there. You pour and I'll be with you in two minutes.

I did as I was told and by the time, I had two of Jenny's elegant glasses poured she was there beside me. We clinked our glasses together. "Here's to the success of whatever venture brings you to the big city," she raised her glass in a toast and we sat together on the sofa, sipping the fragrant liquid.

"Can you tell me why you're working in the library?" Jenny asked, "or is it all a big secret?"

"I'd like to talk to you about it," I answered, "but I don't need to use names and you'll please keep this to yourself, at least for now." Jenny nodded, "Of course," she agreed.

So I told her the whole story, from the beginning right up to the point at which I left the library to walk to her house. Jenny listened intently, asking questions for clarification but not interrupting my flow. I had not realised how much I needed to share this burden until I began to talk and as I poured out the story the weight was lifted.

"Bless you Jenny," I said finally, "you always were a good listener." By the time I had finished the story only the remnants of the delicious meal lay on the table, the first wine bottle was empty and the second bottle begun.

"We'll leave these things on the table for now," Jenny said, and we settled ourselves back on the sofa. "Have you found anything in the library so far?" she asked.

"Nothing," I replied, "it doesn't help that the index is so damn primitive."

"Tell me about it," she said ruefully, "I've spend many a miserable hour going through those stupid little drawers. And you're going back there tomorrow?"

"That's the plan, and maybe the next day if I don't turn anything up tomorrow, but if I can't find anything after that I'm not sure what we're going to do. I haven't dared think about that."

Jenny looked thoughtful. "This might be a very long shot," she said, "I can't help you from any personal knowledge, but I do know of someone who might. At least," she said, "I used to know of someone, it was a few years ago, and I heard that the man in question had dropped out of circulation."

I felt a surge of hope as Jenny continued.

"His name is Brother John, have you heard of him?" I shook my head; I didn't recall anyone of that name. "I met him only the once, he officiated at a ceremony I attended once. After the rite was over, everyone was mingling, just chatting really. It was a beautiful moonlit summer night; I remember it so vividly. I was in a small group of people just chatting when I sort of felt... I'm not sure how to describe it really, a 'presence' I suppose you'd call it. I looked up and saw Brother John looking intently at me, from the other side of the garden. He looked very worried and came over almost at a run. He asked me if he might speak to me in private. He had these piercing blue eyes that seemed to see right into my soul and his voice was wonderful, like chocolate. I had no idea what he wanted but I let him lead me a few yards away, just so we were out of earshot of the rest of the group. He put a hand on my shoulder and said "Jennifer, it is Jennifer, isn't it?" I was very surprised that he knew my name, but I supposed someone must have told him. But I said, yes that was my name. I was feeling a bit wary as you might imagine. And then he said, "what I am going to say to you may sound incredible, but you must listen, understand and act on what I tell you." Well, I was so surprised I just nodded, and he said, "Jennifer although you have no symptoms at the moment you are seriously ill, you have a problem with your heart which will kill you if it is not treated promptly. Tomorrow without fail you must seek medical attention. Go to your doctor and insist that they perform an urgent scan of your heart. They will not believe you are ill; they will think you are hysterical or delusional but somehow you need to convince them. Do you understand?" Of course I was utterly shocked, I was completely well, never felt better in fact but there was something about him that made me believe him. I asked him how he knew, and how for that matter did he know my name. He said that he had a gift that enabled him to see or feel things that most people could not see. Then he asked a strange question. He asked if he could touch me. If it had been anyone else, I would have thought it a bit creepy but with him it just seemed natural. So, I said yes. He unfastened my robe, just a couple of buttons, slid one hand inside and rested it on my chest just beneath my left breast. I had nothing on except my robe, we had just finished the ceremony and we had been sky clad for that of course. He put his other hand on my shoulder, sort of holding me steady. He closed his eyes and we stayed like that for a minute or two. His hand was warm and firm, I don't know how to explain it but I could feel some kind of force coming from his hand and somehow I knew I could trust him. Finally, he took his hands away and I fastened my robe. Then he kind of nodded and said that now he was sure and that I must do what he asked and see my doctor the next day. And that was it, he said goodbye and was swallowed up in the crowd. I made my excuses and left.

The next day, when I woke up feeling full of the joys of spring, I nearly dismissed the whole thing as some sort of crazy joke but when I remembered the touch of his hand I decided to get checked up, so I went to see my Doctor. She was very nice, I pretended I had some chest pain, and she ordered an ECG, just on their local machine. The nurse did it later that morning and I went to work as usual. Then in the middle of the afternoon I got a call from the Doctor saying that an ambulance was on its way to pick me up to take me to a specialist coronary unit for an immediate assessment. It turned out that I had some sort of aneurysm which could have burst at any time and would have killed me in seconds. I had surgery to correct it that same night and here I am having lived to tell the tale. That was a long time ago, but if you can find him I'm sure he will know what to do." After I recovered from the operation, I painted a picture but I had no way to contact him. I gave it to the woman who organised the ceremony and didn't get it back so maybe it found its way to him.