Settle in, my sweet lebbis and gents, for we are charting some new territory. This is a heart-wrencher, and a period piece. New story, new characters, old era. I'm taking you way back to my early, early years for this one. Not that I'm ancient, mind you whippersnappers. If you were around to enjoy the mid-1980s, welcome back. If not, take my word for it: the global situation was far from perfect, but the pop culture, dudes and dudettes, was, like, totally bitchin' tubular. (That's early/mid-'80s for "rad(ical)," which is mid-/late '80s for "great" or "cool.") Okay, that's subjective. We could also use "awesome," but that word's been just as popular and ubiquitous ever since. Like "dude." (Although "dude"'s female counterpart crashed and burned before those four non-aging, adolescent, mutated, crime-fighting, pizza-loving Manhattan reptiles stopped saying it.) Besides its unique aspect, this is a love letter from me to this quirky little epoch. I'm inclined to say—though I
shan't
...if you don't like this story, you're wrong. Enjoy. And no spoilers, but it might not hurt to have a tissue nearby.
P.S. I'm keeping my Lit handle for the Readers' benefit, but am now going by the nickname Sapphire Smokey. You can find me with another presence for my writing under that moniker.
*****
Girlfriend Is Better
Saturday, January 5th, 1985, 11:12 a.m.
It was so frigidly cold in the suburban heart of Juniper, Minnesota, the temperature was barely double-digits F. Three hundred miles and one national border north, it was 12° below zero C. The cloudless, sunny sky was all that kept Juniperites (and Ontarians) from being buried in lovely white crystals. Many outdoor creatures—and indoor humans—lay in cozy hibernation. One of those humans relaxed wrapped in a blanket on her comfy sofa at 908 Silent Shadow Court, in Harper County.
30-year-old Trish Lowery was on the couch, under the covers, her stuffed rabbit Trixie in one arm, Zenith remote in the other paw. She lay snug in her p.j.s, a large neon velvet bow atop her head. After a long week at the office—excepting Tuesday, the calendar-recycling holiday—she'd earned some quality R&R time to veg with the tube. She indulged her adult side with shows which were filmed, and her kid side with ones that were drawn. She looked forward to another wonderful weekend with her girlfriend Sonya Ross, who'd be home from the market any minute. They'd been together seven years, staying at Trish's almost the whole of the time.
Sonya, 28 going on 29, performed errands like groceries and such in the wintertime, preferring cold over warm. And Trish, who preferred the opposite...made sure the car's AC was in top shape in the summer...when Sonya
also
did said errands. Both worked, and while Sonya didn't really mind taking care of these things, and knew her girlfriend's job could be taxing...she got tired as well, and was less up to them some times than others. She tried not to let on, though, as she liked the feeling of Trish needing her around. Her job was important, but on her off hours, Sonya frankly liked feeling domestic. Trish could be a little...okay, a
lot
tidier for her, but Sonya tried not to let this get to her either. They loved each other so very much, emotionally, and
passionately
. Tuesday at midnight, they'd shared both their most sensual New Year's kiss and New Year's bop to date.
Trish put the remote on the coffee table. Her 2-year-old Maine Coon daughter Fluffernutter hopped up and strode across. She stepped on a button, changing the channel.
"Tab's got Sass! Ooh, you're gonna love it! The sassy crisp taste—"
Bzzt!
"—Sun-Maid Raisins. I wouldn't dream of using anything—"
Fluff then turned attention to her Mommy, sniffing and rotating her ears.
"Hey!
Ca
-at!..." Trish playfully scolded, picking up the ragamuffin. "Why're you such a cat?"
"Mrrrrow."
"Oh, is that so?" Trish countered. "Yes, well, Mommy's watching TV right now. I'm sorry, but you may
not
watch Heathcliff. The cats may be great and superior, but they won't
always
get their way. Ha ha ha."
"...talking part of this complete breakfast!" "Snap"-"Crackle"-"Pop!" "Rice Krispies!"
The station Fluffernutter'd just selected wrapped up its break. Mel Blanc's voice greeted them with a returning bumper.
"Hee-hee-hee! Now back to Heathcliff!"
An incredulous Trish whipped her face to the screen, as her feline companion began kneading her under the boobs.
"...Oh! Oh, rubbing it in, are we?" the amazed human asked the purring cat, scratching her ears and under the chin. Fluff slowed up her kneading, shutting her eyes tight with intensified purrs. She cocked her little head, leaning into the petting—until both heard approaching footsteps. Fluffernutter promptly jumped off, using Trish's tummy as a launchpad to meet her second Mommy at the door. Outside, Sonya shifted grocery bags to one arm, freeing the other to retrieve her key. Her frizzy, teased-up hair was even more flipped and tossed by the windy gusts. And she'd have to make sure she still had her Ms. Pac-Man earrings on. As per usual, Fluff waited for her to get both feet inside, and immediately began figure-eighting her legs.
"Mrrrrow. Mrrrrow. Mrrrrow. Mrrrrow.
Mrrrrow.
Mrrrrrow."
"Mmph! Hi, cat. A'right, scoot," Sonya replied, hefting the bags. Trish snapped her fingers to reclaim Fluff's attention—"Kitty! Yo. C'mere"—as her partner assumed the kitchen. Kitty about-faced back onto Trish's welcoming warm belly. Some groceries were to be cupboarded, others converted into lunch. Sonya put away all items not required for the repast, then crossed back to return outside for the Gazette. She slipped in, locked the door, took off her shoes and socks, and offered Trish the baggied periodical.
"Paper, sweets."
"Goody!" Trish whipped off the baggie and noisily leafed to her favorite section. "Funnies, come to Mama!
"Oh—Sonya, honey?" she called as her beloved wandered back towards the kitchen. "There's nothing I wanna watch on TV, and I'm not really in the mood to let Fluff make me watch her cartoons right now."
"Seriously?" came Sonya's voice. "
Eighty
channels, and you can't find anything? What the hell'd we get cable for?"
"You wanna please put my tape on, honey darling?" Trish sweetly entreated. "It's cued up."
"Oh, Trishy, can't you do that yourself?"