Mom had been staying with Elaine for about two weeks when we noticed a decided change in her and at first, we took it as a sign that things were working themselves out over there, but then Mom started eating dinner with us more and whenever Elaine had to work extra, Mom was at the house, presumably because they didn't have a place to just lay out and relax. Jenni and I finally decided to have a talk with Elaine to be sure that we weren't contributing to a problem.
Jenni was able to check her schedule to know when to contact her and we met her at a coffee shop that wasn't one of our usual haunts. She was in a good mood when she got there, which was a good sign and the hugs and kisses she greeted us with were sincere.
"I know you didn't go to all this trouble just for a cup of coffee," she said, "so what's up?"
We told her of our concerns and our observations and for a couple of minutes she seemed to be just allowing it to digest.
"Well," she said, "I wish I could answer all of your questions, but I can't. She's been quite moody for about a week or more and I know she's not really happy, but when I suggested that she might want to go back home, she said she wasn't ready to do that. I've been walking a fine line to be sure that I don't say or do anything to upset her even more but that doesn't really seem to have had any effect on her."
"Can you think of anything we can say or do to help her?" I asked.
"Not unless you can get into her head," she said.
"It's none of our business," Jenni said, "but does it have anything to do with sex or the lack of it?"
"Your right," she said' "it is none of your business, but I'll tell you anyway. There are absolutely no problems in that department. We've both been very happy once I got used to being less aggressive."
"Believe it or not, Elaine," I said, "I'm really happy to hear that and that you're being less aggressive."
"Under other circumstances, I would prove it to you," she said," but your mother made it very clear that if she can't have you, neither can I."
"OMG," Jenni said, "Mom's putting her foot down."
"She's a stronger woman than you give her credit for," she said.
"I guess we can try to find out what's going on," I said, "but it sounds like she's not even sure herself."
"I think that's the problem," she said.
We invited Mom for dinner that Thursday and of course, she knew something was up but she accepted anyway. I think it shocked her when we actually cooked the meal ourselves. We had oven baked chicken with baked potatoes and a veggie dish and for dessert we had a raspberry cheesecake.
The conversation before dinner was confined to current events and a discussion about the bills relating to the house. Thank heavens we were current on them even though it had been a strain but then she said that she would pay the next month's bills since it was still her house. That was a huge relief.
"Well girls," she said, "I'm impressed. You're doing amazingly well and that dinner was incredible, but you wanted to talk to me about Elaine and myself so let's get comfortable and you can play psychologists or whatever."
We went into the living room with coffee. Mom sat in the recliner and Jenni and I sat on the couch.
"That's not it, Mom," I said. "It's been obvious to us for quite a while that something is bothering you and we just thought maybe you wanted someone to talk to or something."
"We're just concerned when you're not happy," Jenni said, "so of course we want to try to do something about it if we can."
"Whatever we talk about tonight is not to get back to Elaine," she said. "If I want her to know something, I'm the one that has to tell her."
"Of course," I said. "We aren't going to tell her anything."
"You can tell her you're trying but that's all." She said. "It's just that I'm still torn about my decisions, but it isn't just about the sex between Danni and I, although that is still an issue. It's more about giving up my life here and accepting my life with her. She is so different than anyone I've been with. She's extremely passionate, but more in control of her emotions now, she's caring in her own way, although tends to be a bit controlling if I don't watch what's going on, and very focused. She has the rest of the year planned out in great detail and if she varies, like when I moved in with her, she has to work for days to adjust the plan. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, because it isn't. I'm just not used to having to check the days or the next week's plans all the time before we do anything."
"Has she proven that she really loves you?" I asked.
"I think so," she said, "or at least she's trying to. In fact, sometimes it's like she's trying too hard."
"So you're not sure if she does or is just acting the part?" Jenni asked.
"I guess," she said. "I wish I could just accept the fact that she does, but I can't for some reason."