Remote Control Mittens

The Mittens series so far:

Mittens

Schrödinger's Mittens

Cyber Mittens

High Voltage Mittens

*****

Samantha: Well, here we are again.

Nina: Yup.

Samantha: Another short one?

Nina: I wanted to crowbar this little adventure in. :)

Samantha: So this is actually mostly about a friend of ours.

Samantha: Permission has been granted.

Samantha: Names have been changed.

Samantha: We wouldn't have put this in the Mittens continuity in the first place, seeing as it's less about sex and more about one specific lovely moment, but...

Samantha: Well...

Nina: We only just found out that this happened!

Nina: I mean, this was years ago, now, and we were at a party last week and it just, kind of... came out.

Samantha: There was SO much giggling.

Nina: It wasn't as awkward as you might think.

Samantha: We are being deliberately opaque here.

Nina: You'll see why. Enjoy!

***

Heading out of the restroom, Khushi saw a familiar face passing by in front of the arcade, on the way to the Jumping Rabbit.

The familiar face saw her, too.

"Khushi!" called Nina, and she came bounding across the midway, bringing along - who was that? Samantha?

Yes, that's Samantha... And they're holding hands?

"Nina? Sam?" said Khushi. "What're you doing here?"

Internally, Khushi sighed.

Start asking a question. Realize after you've said the first word that it's a stupid question. Finish asking said question anyway, knowing that you sound like an idiot. Wonderful.

"

Rollercoasters!

" cried Nina. "What're

you

doing here?"

Khushi grinned.

And, just like that, Nina flips things around so I don't have to feel silly anymore.

She's awesome.

"Rollercoasters," agreed Khushi. "Adrian's gonna meet me here after work."

Abruptly, she felt a vibration around her midsection.

Now?! Now, while I'm talking to Nina?! Adrian, you bastard, I'm going to - oh. That's my phone.

She unzipped and reached into her fanny pack. "In fact, he's just texted me now - oh."

Samantha frowned. "Everything all right?"

Khushi looked up from her phone. "He's stuck in traffic. Says the tunnel's blocked, looks like an accident."

Samantha grimaced. "Yeesh. Those things are hell on a

normal

day."

"Tell me about it," said Khushi, firing back an "Okay, see you soon" text and replacing her phone in the fanny pack. "Well, this is a co-incidence!"

Nina grinned. "Isn't it just!"

Samantha grinned, too, but there was something else in that grin - Khushi couldn't quite put her finger on it. "We're gonna head over to the Jumping Rabbit. You want to join us?"

Khushi hesitated.

I should probably take it out,

she thought.

But they just saw me coming out of the restroom, it'd look weird if I just turned around and went straight back in. I mean, what would I say? "Sorry, I went in the restroom and forgot what I went in there for, but now I remember that I was going to pee. Silly me."

"Sure," she said. "To be honest Adrian and I were doing a kind of date thing, but, hell, he's not here!"

"Well," said Nina - and Khushi noticed that her fingers were twining around Samantha's - "we won't be offended if you split off once he gets here. Hang out with us for a while. Amusement parks aren't much fun on your own. Yes, Sam and I are an item."

Khushi's mind hit a bump at the unexpected turn of conversation, until she noticed she'd been staring at Nina's hand, nestled inside Samantha's. She looked back up. Samantha was blushing.

"Two weeks yesterday," she said, quietly, smiling a little.

Khushi paused. "...really?"

Nina and Samantha nodded, at once. Khushi, now that she knew, began to see the little telltale signs that this was very true - the way their heads angled ever-so-slightly towards each other, the glowing look about them, the suggestion of one or two extra happiness-pounds around Sam's cheeks.

"Wow," breathed Khushi. "That's

awesome.

"

"You have

no idea,

" said Nina, provoking a grin from Samantha.

"Sam," said Khushi, "I didn't even know you

liked

girls!"

"I didn't," said Samantha with a blush. "I don't. Just..." one of her arms went around Nina's waist. "Just

this

one." And Samantha kissed, briefly but tenderly, Nina's temple.

Khushi chuckled a little. "I don't blame you. Nina is the

most

awesome of awesome people. If anyone was gonna turn your head, it'd be her."

"Oh, you," grinned Nina.

Be friendlier to Sam,

thought Khushi.

She's not just the old-friend-from-school-found-again-on-the-internet anymore, she's going to be a larger part of Nina's life - pay more attention to her, find something in common.

She glanced downwards. "Oh, hey, Sam, we're fanny-pack buddies!"

Nina grimaced. "Yeesh."

Samantha giggled - Khushi had never heard Samantha giggle before - and said "Come on, Nina, it's not like I wear one when I'm

not

planning on going upside-down."

"

Super

-geeky," muttered Nina, clearly without malice.

"Well, I

am

super-geeky," said Samantha. "Look," she said to Khushi, "I've even got the dorky strap-on glasses thing going on, here."

Khushi noted the bright yellow rubber thing attached to Samantha's glasses and looping around the back of her head, but she also noted how Nina began to blush at Samantha's last sentence.

She could've called it a glasses retainer, or whatever it is they're called.

But she didn't.

I wonder if that was intentional.

"Look, there's no line for the Rabbit!" cried Nina, pointing.

But I still have the...

"You coming?" said Nina, bounding off towards the line entrance.

Khushi looked towards Samantha. Samantha smiled, and shrugged.

Okay. Sure, I'll leave it in for now.

"Slow down," yelled Khushi, chasing after Nina.

***

As it turned out, there was a line.

Just a very short one,

thought Khushi.

We should be on the next train, or the one after that. Make a conversation! Say words with your mouth!

"Oh, Nina," said Khushi, "have you seen Om Shanti Om yet?"

Nina shook her head. "Not yet. We should have a viewing party! Samantha's got an

amazing

sound system."

Samantha looked towards Khushi, her left arm snaking around Nina's hips, her right nestled casually in her pocket. "What's Om Shanti Om?"

Khushi grinned. "It's one of Farah Khan's films with Shah Rukh Khan. One of the best."

"In college," said Nina excitedly, "Khushi was the one who introduced me to the joys of

Bol-ollywood!

"

Something jumped and buzzed to life briefly inside Khushi's vagina.

What the hell?! What was that?

Khushi almost yelped, but gained control at the last possible instant.

"Bol-ollywood?" said Samantha, as Khushi glanced around, wondering whether Adrian was skulking nearby, watching her, transmitter in hand, grin on his face.

That'd be just like him. Damn, what's the range on these things anyway...

"Sorry, Bollywood," said Nina, looking at Samantha with a very brief, but very strange expression - almost pleading. "I think I have the hiccups."

"Oh dear," murmured Samantha. "Maybe this rollercoaster will cure them."

"Sam," said Nina excitedly, "We

must

show you Dhoom 2. It's a great introduction to Bollywood. The lead actor is, like, the most amazing dancer you've ever seen - he can turn off gravity, turn his bones to liquid, he's hot as all

hell

and he's got

three

thumbs."

"Three thumbs," said Samantha.

"Three thumbs," said Khushi, grinning. "Hrithik Roshan."

Samantha frowned. "Do I need to have seen Dhoom 1?"

Khushi shook her head. "No. The plot is pretty much nonsense anyway, it's basically a two-and-a-half-hour extended music video with heists and songs and lots of shirtless Hrithik."

"It's

much

more amazing than we're making it sound," grinned Nina. "Khushi, we've got a Bollywood virgin here!"

"Well, we're gonna have to change that then, aren't we

eee

-" that same brief, surprising buzz inside her - "um." Khushi blushed. "Sorry. I think your hiccups are contagious."

Khushi saw, just briefly, a flash of concern pass over Nina's face. It was gone in an instant.

"We're up!" said Samantha, looking past them to the just-arrived empty train. "You'll have to tell me more about Bollywood. Hell, I think you're gonna have to

show

me," she said, easing into the back seat of a two-row car, Nina clambering in after her.

Khushi took the seat in front of them. "That'd be great," she said, the train leaving the station, engaging with the lift chain. "We'll start you off with the more accessible stuff, then we'll do... was this

always

this high?" She peered out over the sides.

Nina giggled. "Probably looks higher because you're looking behind you," she said.

"Right," said Khushi, turning around to look ahead up the lift hill.

She felt the same brief buzz, deep inside.

Okay, now what the hell. Is it picking up my cellphone or something? Remote control vibes don't just go off by themselves for no reason.

She heard a giggle behind her. Nina. She looked around.

Nina was blushing and grinning, her eyes closed. Samantha was kissing her on the neck, her left arm around Nina - the other pressed against her pocket.

Oh my God.

She watched Samantha's fingertips whiten against something hard in her pocket - jumped when she felt another brief little buzz.

Nina's wearing one too.

Another giggle from Nina, as her fingers tightened around Samantha's thigh.

...and they're on the same frequency!

In awful slow-motion, she watched Samantha notice her watching, blush, give her an innocent, "Nope, nothing naughty going on here" sort of smile.

Say something so you're not just staring, Khushi.

"Yayyyy," said Khushi weakly, as they began to roll downhill.

"Yay!" sang Samantha in agreement - and the buzz came back, shaking Khushi's insides. Wind rushed past her, old bearings roared beneath her, and she was very conscious of every single wooden plank attacking her from beneath - and then as they reached the valley of the first hill, the vibrator became heavier, began to slide down, tingling around the entrance of her vagina.

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

She heard Nina giggling maniacally behind her - had enough time to wonder whether she should feel weird, feel guilty, or just try to enjoy it, when they flew over the crest of the second hill, Khushi rising momentarily out of her seat, the vibrator sliding up and embedding itself deeper inside her.

"AAH!" cried Khushi.

Behind her, semi-hysterical giggling from Nina, squeals of delight from Sam.

As they roared into the tunnel around the first corner, Khushi felt the vibrator move inside her, to her right. She gasped, gripping the grab rail with whitened knuckles, being propelled, unable to stop, feeling herself beginning to rise up on top of it, ride the track, ride the machine, ride the sensation, and when they barreled back into the sunlight Khushi was crying out in delight too, sharing Nina's joy. She laughed in the sun as the train hurled her around and up the next hill, the egg shifting downwards with a happy little internal squelch, its vibrations pulsing around the delicious place just behind her pubic bone, shifting with the train, vibrating at Samantha's touch.

She tensed, orgasm already beginning to grow inside her, hot and shivery and wet, wind whipping her hair back, her breasts bouncing inside her bra, nipples tightening, every bump and jostle moving the egg around to new places.

She heard Nina crying out behind her, and cried out in response, sharing in Nina's joy, her initial shock morphed into delighted surprise. She tensed the muscles between her thighs, rose an inch from the floor as they crested the final hill, rode the orgasm, letting out a high, quiet squeak as the warm, electrifying waves bloomed through her.

Her butt hit the bench with a thump, her underwear sliding smoothly and wetly against her labia as the train came to a stop.

Behind her, Nina laughed - a full, breathless laugh of unadulterated happiness. Khushi turned to look, and saw Nina collapse against Samantha, blushing, eyes sparkling, hair everywhere, wearing the sort of huge, silly grin that comes with a complete lack of self-consciousness. She'd utterly let it go.

Probably left it in the tunnel,

mused Khushi, feeling her own smile up in her eyes, reflected back at Nina.

Just like me.

"That," said Nina, between big gulping breaths of air as Samantha unfastened her seatbelt, "was

awesome.

"

Khushi could only giggle in response.

***

Khushi made her way unsteadily down the exit ramp.

Okay, so... now, after that wonderful moment, now the guilt comes.

She watched the backs of Nina and Samantha's heads, angling towards each other as they strode hand-in-hand down the ramp ahead of her.

It's a beautiful thing to share in, but to do so secretly and accidentally...

Should I tell them, so as to at least eliminate the "secretly" part of that equation, or just go to the bathroom, sneak the vibe out, and treasure the memory of that moment of shared joy for what it was?

A vibration, around her midsection.

How could I have mistaken

that

for the egg, before?

She reached into her fanny pack as she walked, pulled out the phone. Adrian, of course.

Well, I

should

tell them... but...

She grinned.

Maybe in five years or so.

"Guys, this is Adrian. I'll catch up with you two later, okay?"

Samantha and Nina waved their goodbyes as they walked, laughing and hanging onto each other, two people utterly lost in each other.

Khushi smiled... and only watched Samantha's butt for the barest of moments before hitting Answer.

***

Samantha: Now, if this were a porno, rather than us just telling what happened, what would have happened next?

Nina: I suppose Khushi would have gone and got off in the bathroom, and I would've gone in too, and I guess maybe you would've hit the button from outside...

Samantha: Hmm?

Nina: ...and then we probably would've both been overcome with lust and made out while our respective remote-controlled vibes buzzed in our panties, whispering to each other about how naughty we all were?

Samantha: And I suppose I would've come in and seen you two reduced to incoherence, and just decided to join in.

Nina: Something like that, yeah.

Samantha: And what actually happened is that

years

went past before it even came up again!

Samantha: And then we wrote a really short story about it.

Nina: Yup. Because we are, after all, naughty bunnies.

Samantha: That was fun. And "Khushi" was right to wait, I'd have probably been mortified if she'd have told us there and then.

Nina: Really?

Nina: I probably would've just collapsed in fits of giggles.

Samantha: Yeah, because

you

weren't the one tickling her vag at the push of a button. Or, for that matter, tickling YOUR vag at the push of a button, WHILE YOU WERE TALKING TO A CLOSE FRIEND.

Samantha: I still can't believe I did that.

Nina: You bite me on the ass while I'm on the phone to my

mom,

Sam.

Nina: And you've sure as hell done naughtier things than that. Just wait 'til we tell the gentle readers what happens in Soaking Wet Mittens.

Samantha: I confess. I am a very, very naughty woman.

Nina: Wanna do the Next Time On Mittens thing, Sam?

Samantha: Next time, on Mittens: ACTUAL LESBIAN SEX! And not rollercoasters!

Nina: No rollercoasters?

Nina: Aw. :(

Samantha: Will you accept anal instead?

Nina: ...ooh. Sam, I'm wondering now about buttplugs on rollercoasters. I wonder how safe would that be.

Samantha: ...well, the box doesn't say "Don't have this thing squeezed up your bum while riding a rollercoaster." Because WHY WOULD IT.

Nina: Good point.

Samantha: See you later, gentle reader!

Samantha: (I'll make sure she doesn't end up in the emergency room)

Nina: Because you are the best Sam.

Samantha: And you are the best Nina.

Samantha: C'mere, you.

Nina: Mrr.

Nina has disconnected.

***

But that's not all...

***

Nina: Okay, here it is.

Samantha: Please don't judge us too harshly.

Nina: Anything you want taken out or changed, let us know. We want you to be absolutely happy with this before we publish it.

Khushi: Okiedokie. Reading now.

Samantha: Okay.

Nina: OK

Samantha: Nervous now

Nina: You're always nervous before we publish.

Samantha: It's different this time!

Samantha: It's Khushi!

Khushi: Quit making my thing buzz, you're distracting me

Nina: sorry

Samantha: Sorry!

Nina: Heh.

Nina: Making your thing buzz.

Khushi: Halfway through

Samantha: /bites nails

Nina: /wriggles

Nina: Don't read the sequels to this, they're embarrassing!

Nina: I have super-embarrassing kinks!

Khushi: OK I'm done.

Khushi: A) if you tell someone you have super-embarrassing kinks, they're gonna guess wildly at what they are.

Khushi: B) you like pee, you told everyone that already.

Nina: :o

Nina: so i did

Khushi: C...

Khushi: Write that story.

Nina: ...

Samantha: ...whut

Khushi: Fictionalize it!

Samantha: ...what, write the scenario we described in the ending chatlog?

Khushi: It sounds hot!

Nina: Wouldn't that be weird?

Khushi: WEIRDER THAN THIS?

Samantha: Good point.

Khushi: I think if it's more heavily fictionalized, further from the truth, it'll be

less

weird. Plus this is really short.

Nina: How do we handle continuity?

Khushi: Comics do it all the time. It's an imaginary story. Outside of canon.

Samantha: Write non-canon fanfic of OURSELVES?

Nina: Write fanfic of you? PORN FANFIC OF YOU?

Khushi: Not fanfic of me! Fic of Khushi!

Khushi: Original fic! Not about Khushi, but about Khushi!

[SAM EDIT: Khushi used her real name above, but we've left it as Khushi to protect her privacy]

[NINA EDIT: Sam that's confusing]

[SAM EDIT: Don't edit my edits!]

Khushi: Incidentally, Nina, are you being a desk right now?

Nina: No!

Nina: Sam and I aren't even in the same room!

Nina: Talking to you while being a naked desk would be weird!

Khushi: Weirder than getting off on rollercoasters.

Khushi: Weirder than getting your friends off on rollercoasters.

Khushi: Weirder than writing about it.

Khushi: Weirder than putting it on the internet.

Samantha: ...are you

sure

you're okay with this?

Khushi: If you fictionalize it, yes.

Samantha: Give us a minute.

Khushi: Take your time.

Nina: Okay we've talked about it and we're gonna just write it and then see if it's weird or not. And if we end up publishing an ebook version we want to give you a cut of the money.

Khushi: I look forward to reading it! You don't have to cut me in.

Nina: Well, we want to. So there.

Samantha: Guess you'd better get writing, hon.

Khushi: /cracks whip

***

Nina: So, here's the result of that conversation.

Samantha: It is non-canonical.

Nina: None of this actually happened.

Nina: But for avoidance of doubt, I absolutely

am

a desk right now.