So we were forced to go on living. Like zombies we passed each other only sometimes opening up about our feelings or thoughts.
Free from entanglements, on Valentine's morning, I drove to my late sister's apartment. The purpose was to organize, remember and also, in a way, let go of my sister. My parents were happy that I was doing this. I arrived mid-morning and we got a lot of things accomplished. I was not hostile to Donna, now, so we talked freely. She described how she had met my sister, and her whole story. We both cried as we chatted.
We went through clothes, and books, catholic rosaries, and photos. Donna would keep most things, I would take back home some things, and we would donate other things to charity. We cried and hugged several times, pulling Paulina's personal items and telling stories.
As we broke for lunch I got a call from my Mother. "Kathy it is snowing on the Interstate and we got 2 inches already. Now they are calling for 6 plus inches. You'd better stay there with Donna, tonight."
The first thing I noticed in the apartment was that there was only one full size bed. The sofa wasn't big enough to sleep on, but I announced to Donna, that to be cautious with the snow storm, that I'd sleep on it.
After lunch, we packed some boxes in my car and then came back inside to talk and watch TV. I told her that I wanted to have a bath right after the movie ended. Right on cue, about 4:00 p.m. the power went out in just before the movie ended. We weren't sure that it was a total outage, but the lights flickered back on twice more and then it got dark and cold.
Donna suggested "If you want a bath, you'd better take it now because we won't have any heat either!" She marched into the bathroom and filled the tub with hot water. She gave me my sister's old pajama shirt and bathrobe and let me get started. I soaked in the tub for about 10 minutes when Donna, knocked on the door and came in. I was shy about being naked in front of her, until she said hurry up. There won't be any hot water for me." I emerged totally nude to the cold air as Donna gave me a towel. She didn't ogle my body, and I was a little surprised that she didn't in my vulnerable state.
The instant I was out and wrapped in a towel, she disrobed. I saw her famous nipples that my sister had described so well. She quickly hopped in the leftover bathwater.
As I opened the bathroom door, I discovered how frigid the apartment was. It must have fallen 10 degrees as I bathed and dried myself. I didn't have all the nightshirts organized, and I wished I had slippers or woolen socks to insulate my feet from the cold. I was reluctant to sleep on the cold sofa, or to hop into her bed. While I thought about the bed that she and my sister made love, I dawdled as my body lost its precious heat.
I was only 5 p.m. and already becoming a dark winter night. It was bizarre to be so cold and dark, but it became obvious that the only thing to do was go to bed.
