Overwhelming Darness

To my fans: This chapter is not about sex, it is a chapter about the pain of separation. It is a chapter about surviving that separation, and it is a chapter about the joy of life changing events. It is necessary to set up the sex in chapter seven.

Separation:

4:12 a.m. I'd been watching those numbers change since I woke at 2:00, unable to stop thinking about saying good bye to the only person, male or female I'd ever fallen in love with. Was it just sexual? Was it just that she had shown me the beauty of Sapphic love?

5:11 a.m. The birds were singing outside and the sky was just starting to brighten. Dawn. Was that a sign? The beginning of a new day; a new life; a life without her?

5:32 a.m. I can't do this. I slowly eased out of bed and went to the bathroom. As I brushed my teeth, I wondered if I woke her; if she would be there when I opened the door. I dressed with one eye on the bedroom and for several minutes I sat at the table, my mind about to explode.

I found a pen and some paper and wrote her a letter.

My dearest Maggie,

I know I'm hurting you by saying goodbye this way but I'd only hurt you more when I fell apart in the morning. I hate saying good bye anyway and saying it while I look into those beautiful hazel eyes as my heart broke into a jillion pieces would not be pretty.

Please know that I have never been so loved by anyone. The sex was so sweet and wonderful but I found myself falling in love with you. Weird huh? Straight innocent Wendy Severenson fell in love with a bisexual wood nymph and now she has to go home with a broken heart and get on with life in a homophobic backward world.

I won't hold you to your promise to be together within six months. Oh, I know you'd keep it, it's just that life gets in the way some times. Oh god, I know that better than almost anyone.

Be kind to yourself and remember me with love just as I will always remember you.

I have so much I want to say but if I get started, I'll just start crying again.

I love you, Maggie, and always will. I have one request. I know I gave you my phone numbers but please, darling don't call for at least a week. I need some time to work my way through the breakdown and heartache

I have to go now or I won't leave at all and I can't allow that to happen

Goodbye, darling and thank you for opening my eyes and my heart.

Wendy.

I wiped away the tear stains and left.

It was 6:09 when I slipped out the door. I walked slowly, almost tiptoeing away from the cabin but once I put space between us I ran. I ran like hell, nearly blinded by tears that would not stop. How many times did my heart tell me to turn around?

A solitary pick up slowed and then stopped. Three men; loggers. Oh god, I didn't need that this morning.

"Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine."

One of them jumped from the truck and approached me...Butch. Oh god, not now, not again.

"Jump in. Wendy. I'll ride in the back. No one is going to hit on you, I promise. Maggie gave us hell and that is one woman you don't cross."

I finally surrendered and for the next ten or fifteen minutes, we rode in silence, I turned away from them and tried to hide the deep sobs.

"You and Maggie have a falling out? Darren asked.

I shook my head. "I have to go home. I have to leave the light of my life here and go home to a crappy job in a crappy, judgmental town."

"Why not quit and move close to Maggie?"

"Reality bites," I replied. "I have responsibilities, I have bills that are past due. I came up here for peace and quiet but then Maggie found me. I fell in love. Hard. Now, I'm back where I started only now I have to try to hold a broken heart together."

"Man, you really fell for her didn't you? If it's any help, you changed her too, Wendy. She loves you and she's never allowed herself to be committed to anyone. I know she's hurting."

"Take care of her Darren. Please."

"No problem," he promised.

When we got to the cabin I ran in to throw myself on the bed. I was still there when I heard tires on the road, heading my way and when they went on past , l became a woman obsessed. I cleaned and packed, determined to get away before she found me and tried to stop me from leaving.

I stopped at a diner much later for coffee and a bagel, but drove the rest of the way non-stop

2.

She respected my wishes for the most part but on day five, I got a package. It wasn't from her, or at least the return address wasn't hers. Very sneaky.

I stared at it for a full day but I finally gave in and ripped it open. That was a mistake. A hand carved wood nymph tumbled onto the floor. It was about six inches tall and so beautiful. I held it to my chest and bawled. I kissed it so often, it was stained by my lipstick and tears and I didn't care. It was on the pillow next to me as I slept and on my desk as I worked.

That night, I picked up the package to throw away the wrappings and was surprised when something wrapped in tissue bounced off the table and onto the floor.

"Oh god," I cried," please, Maggie, don't let this be a ring, and it wasn't. It was heart shaped locket on a gold chain and quite obviously a period piece from someone's estate or collection. About two inches long, blood red, it opened to reveal a picture of my lover and the date we first met.

A single piece of paper fluttered out so I picked it up

"The mate to this piece is against my breast as I write, but it's your picture that fills it. I love you."

"Maggie, you bitch, that's not fair."

I held it tight to my chest but then I unbuttoned my blouse and pulled my bra cup over my breast and placed it against bare flesh as I dropped to the couch to cry.

"Oh god, Maggie, I miss you so much."

When she finally called, I tried to keep it together but only made it for about five minutes.

"I'm sorry, babe," she said. "Should I wait another week?"

"Don't you dare," I replied. "You don't play fair. Maggie the wood nymph is sitting here trying to get my attention."

"Then give her a kiss and touch her where you want to touch me right now."

I kissed the carving on the face and then her left nipple caressed my lips.

"Oh god Wendy, I miss that. My left nipple is throbbing to your touch."

"Stop it, for god's sake."

"Are you wearing the locket I sent?"

"You're the only one that will ever take it off until the day I die."

"I bought them at an estate sale from the Glandwine collection."

"It's beautiful," I said. "Everyone comments on it and asks where I got it. I told them I got it from the wood nymph."

"I gave Darren hell for not bringing you back. I loved your letter but I had trouble reading it through our tears."

"I'm sorry baby I couldn't bear to physically walk away from you. It hurt so much anyway and it still hurts"

"Come home to me darling," she pleaded.

"I can't," I replied. "I do so want to but I can't. All of my bills are marked past due and I need a car."

"Won't your folks help?"

"Yes, but I won't let them. I have a lot to prove. I owe them so much and I need to show them I can make it on my own".

"I'll keep staring out at my classes, wishing I could see you there," she said.

"With my skirt pulled up and my legs spread?" I asked.

"You're a nasty bitch," she said.

"I have an excellent teacher." I said, "and you know you'd love it if you could see this sweet pussy which, by the way has my fingers in it, being very busy."

"Oh my god. You are so mean. So cruel."

"Like you're sitting there, fully dressed, miss so innocent."

" I plan on wearing the same thing every time we call," she replied.

"I think we need to think about getting Skype for these calls,"

"Couldn't that be a bit dangerous?" she wondered."

"No," I replied, "although it might require the purchase of additional protection for the carpets and upholstered furniture,."

"And more toys", she quickly added.

We talked for nearly an hour with neither of us wanting to say goodbye again but eventually, we parted with an agreement to call at least three times a week.

I made it the rest of the summer with an occasional crying jag when my boss or the world in general seemed determined to crush my spirits. It was during those periods that I loved her the most because she was always there for me and always knew just what to say.

After a little over four months apart we started making plans for our reunion. She planned on flying in for our six month anniversary. She even made arrangements for a rental car and four nights at the extended stay hotel.

2:52 p.m. Day one hundred fifty-six, not that I was keeping track or anything, I get message on my computer marked Critical -- read immediately.

"Due to unanticipated changes, your scheduled compliance meeting has been moved to tonight immediately after work. You will be picked up, of course, and returned to your car after the meeting. A full dinner is included and dress is business casual."

"Christine, do I have a compliance meeting scheduled," I asked the secretary.

"No, but remember I was off for a week and they brought in that temp that was so inept."

":Oh what the hell," I thought, "dinner and limo service. Why not?"

I told Christine what was going on and asked her to call me the next day and made sure she had both numbers. "If you don't reach me by mid afternoon, call the police."

She laughed but I told her I was serious. "I don't know what this meeting is, where it is or who it's with".

A few minutes later, she came into my office holding a post-it. "I was able to find out that there are dinner reservations at the Timberline, but that's all."

Well, at least I could plan on a great bone-in rib eye or prime rib.

5: 11 p.m. a uniformed driver waits next to a beautiful satin cashmere metallic luxury sedan,

I headed for the car but never got there before the driver threw off her uniform cap and long, auburn hair tumbled out.

I screamed and ran to her, knocking into the car. I filled my hand with her hair and we kissed with such passion, whimpering and mewling with no shame. Everyone stopped to see if we were all right but I was able to assure them that Maggie was a long lost friend.

"Do you think they bought it?" she asked.

"Oh hell no," I said. "I am now the town's lesbian slut but darling, I don't care. I love you."

I finally got in the car only to discover another woman in the back seat. "I'll explain everything," she assured me.

"Wendy, this is Diane Wilerston, assistant dean of women. I managed to con her into coming down here to help me with my evil intentions."

"You know how persuasive she can be" Diane said.

"Oh boy, do I ever, Did she tell you how we got together?"

"I left out all the juicy details," Maggie said.

"Let's just say there was no seduction. It was more like a shock and aw attack." I added.

"Actually Wendy, I conned her in a way," Diane said."Maggie and I have been friends since grade school so when I found myself in a real cluster fuck, I asked her to meet me at our favorite hangout..I presenter my problem and and even though your name came up a lot, like every time she opened her mouth, she never mentioned your background. Psychology major, graduated with honors, human relations minor, graduated with honors. I was so impressed and I saw a possible solution to my problem. She was so exited, we put this trip together and here we are."

"I wanted a career in HR, and I have one except that the company sold out and the new owners are tearing the company apart piece by piece."

"Are you actively seeking a new job?" she asked.

"Yes, but it's a small town and I'm tied into a lease that has six months left on it. I'm up to my ass in debt and losing ground."

At that very moment, we pulled up to the Timberline's valet.

Maggie spoke to the maitre de and slipped him some cash and we were shown to a table away from the other diners and I finally had a chance to study the very lovely Diane. I wondered just how straight she was.

She was dressed for traveling in gray pleated slacks and silver silk blouse that plunged lo2, revealing tenpting cleavage. Her eyes were an enchanting gray-blue and long auburn hair with streaks of brown flowed smoothly over her shouders.It was difficult to ignore her cleavage but I tried and eventually decided she was a full D cup. I'd do her in a heartbeat, with Maggie's permission of course. Once our drinks were served and food ordered, Diane once again took over the conversation.

"I may have the answer to your problems," she said, "and you may have the ability to save my ass and my job."

"I'd tell you it's a nice ass worth saving, but I have a feeling you don't swing that way."

"You're starting to sound like Maggie," she warned. "Let me start with the basics. First of all we would not be having this conversation if I had the slightest doubt that you would be perfect for what I am about to offer you.

"New student enrollment is down everywhere and we are no exception. During our annual alumni dinner last fall, one of the most generous supporters suggested, and wisely so, that we create a position for a director of diversification and that we actively recruit members of the LGBT community. The idea was so popular that Dean Westerly caved and promised to have positive results by spring break. Some idiot remembered that I was friends with Maggie, our only openly lesbian professor, and suddenly I was in charge of the department and I had thirty days to have the position defined, advertised and filled.

I called on Maggie for guidance and once we put together a concise list of responsibilities, requirements and a decent salary, I posted it.

I worked my ass off and wound up with three candidates, only one of which met even most of the criteria. To make a long story very short I hired her announced my success to everyone, took the praise proudly and fired her when we learned that she had blatantly lied about her achievements. The alumni descended on me like vultures so now I have twenty seven days to fill the position.

Wendy, this position fits you and you are perfect for the position. You have exhibited a willingness to consider other points of view. You have shown that you stick with a job until it is done. You are empathic, and you are young enough to inspire confidence and gain the trust of students male, female and transgender alike. You will have the assistance of the intern of your choice and the full support of the board and the entire administrative group.

If I don't have the position filled as promised, I will be crucified by the alumni and the director. We've already spent a huge amount of money getting ready to flood the market with our announcement and I don't have a name or a face to put on it."

She handed me a copy of the original posting for the position and it was so tempting. It described me to a 'T. I really wanted that job but...

"I'd love to say yes Diane and I am honored that you would consider me but I am up to my ass in debt here and it would be costly to relocate with six months remaining on my lease. I'm sorry, I really am and I hope someone steps up."

"Would this help?" she asked as she passed me the rest of her offer. A generous salary with full benefits from day one, relocation allowance, housing assistance, administrative assistance and a coach to get me through the first ninety days.

"You're making it awfully hard to say no," I told her.

She took the salary offer back and wrote across the bottom, "We will pay off your existing lease and legal will make sure you get fair treatment. "

"Oh, and there is one other thing," Maggie said. "There is no prohibition against co-habitation so you wouldn't pay rent...if you didn't want to."

"Oh god," I said, as my eyes leaked all over her papers, "Yes and thank you, but when would I have to start? I'd need a week to get Darlene up to speed and affect a smooth transition. " r

"Done," she said, "and welcome to the friendliest administrative team ever. There is, however, one request I have that might be a deal killer. Maggie advised me that you hate a liar and that you just don't, but I need you to lie, or at the very least, not deny a lie. It is critical that your application be back dated to show that you were considered as one of the original applicants. Otherwise, I have to go through the process of considering the other two applicants, rejecting them and re-posting the position. Legal demands that we follow due process."

"So I would have to fill out an application, sign my name, and back date it? "

"I have the application right here and I'll back date it for you."

I thought about it and an idea came to me. "I can't," I said, "but my assistant could fill it out and auto-sign it for me if that's acceptable. I don't like it but I really want this job and the only sin would be putting my signature to an altered document. If you are staying in town tonight, I could have it ready by tomorrow morning."

She held out her hand and we shook on it. I was officially the new director of the new diversification department.

"We'll be right back," Maggie said, as she literally yanked me from my seat and dragged me to the ladies room where we kissed, hugged and cried. Oh how we wanted to scream with joy.

"Oh my god, oh my god, tell me I'm not having a beautiful dream." I said.

"No darling, it's all true and we can be forever partners, if you'll have me."

"Oh god yes, of course," I assured her and the love we shared in those moments will always be one of my favorite memories, even though I tried to deny her advances.

"You know how I squirt when I come hard," I told her. "The whole restaurant would know."

"I don't care," she said and she pushed me into a stall and locked the door: I had to brace yself against the wall when she ripped my panties down over my shoes. She ddowe into my pussy and ate me with a vengeance until I jammed my hand into my mouth to keep from screaming as my body turned against me. She drank every drop and licked me clean, which damn near made me come again but I forced her face away. I bent her over the toiletand fingered her through two hard orgasms and an anal rimming before we called it quits.

I threw my panties away and we splashed cold water on our faces, cleaned up as best we could and repaired our make up before returning to our table and the angel that made this all possible.

"Are we okay?" Diane asked, with a grin.

"I only have one wish," I replied

'What might that be?"

"I wish you were a lesbian or at least bisexual because this would be a night you'd never forget. "

"She laughed and reminded me that she was married.

"If he was here we'd do him too," Maggie declared.

Diane laughed and told us there was something waiting for us in our room so we passed on dessert and the three of us went to our room.

Sitting on the balcony was champagne on ice, a bouquet of roses, and silver bowls of red ripe strawberries.

This was going to go down in my journal as the day the sun began to shine on me.

To be continued...