I was feeling a little bit lost on the taxi ride home. I was wondering how I had reached this point, how I had wound up in bed with Cassie. It was the last place I expected to find myself, especially after the fight we had just had. But it was good, it was amazing. I could still feel her tender caresses, her gentle kisses. I could still hear her soft moans. I could still see her back arching as she came. I could still taste her. I ran my mind back over the events of the night, savouring every memory of Cassie, and especially her passion.
After our fight Cassie had sent me a text message. "Sorry," it had said, "I need to speak to you." I'd ignored it, and the others that followed, I'd even put my phone on silent, although she hadn't tried to call. She must have understood at least a little that I was too mad to speak to her just now.
After a few more glasses of champagne though, the heat of my anger had subsided. I regretted some of the things that I had said when I had been angry as well. Cassie deserved an apology from me even more than I deserved one from her. I decided to stop by her place on my way home when I left the party. It wasn't out of my way, and it would be best to clear the air before our argument had had too long to fester.
Her eyes were red when she let me in, and I realised she had been crying. I felt terrible. She had a glass of wine in her hand and she looked a little tipsy.
"I'm sorry, Lisa," she said, "I'm so sorry. You were right. Right about everything. I'm your friend. I shouldn't be judging you."
"I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have said the things I said. You were just looking out for me. I can see that now, I can see you were worried about me getting hurt. You care about me and I said those terrible things, I'm so sorry."
My own tears weren't far off.
"Sometimes I wish I was like you Lisa. You're always so sure about the choices you make. You always charge forward, no doubts, no regrets, come what may.
"Sometimes I doubt all of my decisions. Sometimes I think no one will ever want me. I'm thirty years old. I'm a virgin. What if I die a virgin? What if everyone thinks I'm a freak?
"I worry about these things. I worry that it's too late to change now, that I just have to stick to the path I'm on. If I ever get a man I won't know what to do, I won't be able to make him happy. That's okay when you're twenty, but I'm thirty. THIRTY!"
"Oh fuck, what am I going to do, Lisa?"
The only thing I could do was put my arms around her. I had no idea what to say. I'd never seen even a hint of her doubts before. She'd always been so strongly devout in her beliefs. We held each other and sobbed together.
"I'm not like that inside Cassie, I get scared, I get lonely. I've always envied your faith, your ability to draw strength from an endless source. When I get scared it's just me, I'm all alone. Sometimes I can hardly get out of bed in the morning. But I do, I have to, there's no choice, we just have to keep on going."
"Really? But you always look so sure, so determined. I've admired that. I've envied it."
I could feel Cassie's cheek on my cheek. I could feel her chest heaving with her sobs. The scent of her perfume filled my nose. We were both feeling vulnerable, and we were both there for one another, confessing our secret fears that we had never told anyone before.
I don't know how it began, but our lips met. They brushed together gently, delicately. It felt like a butterfly's kiss might, tender and sweet, tentative and experimental. It felt right. I knew it felt right to her as well when I felt her tongue caress my lip. I opened my mouth slightly and let our tongues join sensuously.
She began to speak, "We–"
"Shhhh. It's alright. We're alright. We'll be alright," I said, cutting her off as I placed a finger over her lips. My heart was racing. I had never expected to be here, with her, doing this, but now that I had been given a glimpse I didn't want to stop. I didn't want to let her question what was happening. I didn't want to let her bring her doubts into the light where they might grow.
She parted her lips and took my fingertip in her mouth. My temperature skyrocketed as I felt the cool wetness of her tongue and lips surround and caress my finger. She sucked my finger into her mouth, down to the first knuckle, sending tingles rushing out from my fingertip. When she took the second knuckle into her cool wet mouth another round of tingles shot out chasing the first.
I kissed her tenderly on the cheek, letting our cheeks brush together. She released my finger, and I felt her lips on my cheek as well, I felt her sweet kisses, and I heard her breath passing my ear. Her moist lips left a trail of kisses on my cheek as she moved towards my neck and ear. She nuzzled that sensitive part of my neck just under my ear, sending more tingles rocketing through my body. She set my heart to pounding when she took my earlobe in her mouth and nibbled it gently.
She was wearing a white terry-towel dressing gown. I undid the waistband, opened the front, and pushed it off her shoulders. She stood naked in my arms. I ran my hands over her soft skin. I ran my fingertips gently up and down her back, up and down her side. I ran my nails softly over her tender flesh. I heard her moan quietly in my ear.
It was an unexpected pleasure to hold Cassie's naked body in my arms, to feel her breath flow over my skin, but it was right. With each passing moment, with each sensation heightening my arousal, I knew that this would be the ultimate expression of our friendship, of our love for one another. We were changing something intangible into something physical, transforming our devotion to one another into sensuality.
I wanted to feel her skin against my own, to feel her breasts caress my own, to feel the lightning that would come when her nipples brushed my own. I stepped back from her and pulled my top up and over my head. I drank in the sight of her body, gorged my eyes on her voluptuous form, from her heavy breasts to her wide hips and the narrow waist between. She was a sexy woman and I was rapidly losing what little self-control I still had.
Cassie closed the space between us while my hands were above my head. I felt her hands on my breasts and her lips on my neck. Her touches sent shivers running up and down my spine. She slipped her hands to my bare back, and drew me against her body. Finally our breasts met, it seemed like sparks jumped between out erect nipples.
With my hand under her chin I lifted her face to mine and brought our lips together in a passionate kiss. Her lips felt soft and delicate against mine. Our tongues met for a moment and then continued their journey to explore one another's mouths. I was afloat on a sea of passion and desire.
When I held Cassie I could feel the muscles move under her skin, but they were covered with a soft and curvaceous layer of flesh. When I kissed her she tasted of strawberries. It was her lip gloss, but it didn't matter, it was Cassie, sweet, sensual, and passionate. And as I was now discovering, erotic and arousing as well.
As we kissed, I ran my hands over as much of her exposed body as I could reach, from the swell of her buttocks and the curve of her hip all the way up to the sensual contours of her neck. I moved my head to her neck, licking from where her jaw meets her ear down to the depression between her collarbones. I kissed my way up her throat and chin and then kissed her all along her jaw line until I reached her ear.
I used my lips and tongue to tickle her just under her ear, I left a moist path of kisses and licks around the back of her ear, finally ending at the top where I took her ear in my mouth, bending it, licking it, nibbling it. I ran my tongue along the curve of the inside of her ear until I finally reached the centre where I delicately probed at the canal.
My hands had a mind of their own, and they explored every part of her body that was within reach. One hand moved inward from her hip and up her waist to her breasts. It was an amazing sensation to cup another woman's breast in my hand, a breast that didn't come close to fitting within the palm of my hand. Her nipples were long and pointy, easy to take between my fingers and pinch and squeeze.
My other hand wandered down her back, my nails pressed into her flesh. When it reached the base of her spine, my fingers slid down the crevice between her buttocks, down past her anus to her pussy lips, which were now moist and slippery.
As if my touching her pussy was a cue, she began to undo the buttons on my jeans. "God yes!" I thought to myself. "Let me press my whole naked body against you. Let me feel the heat of our skin touching from the tips of our toes all the way to our breasts, to our lips!"
Once she had my pants undone, I helped her push them down, and then kicked them off. I was a little surprised when I felt her hand on my pussy, her fingers exploring my lips, but I welcomed her touch, and opened my legs in the hopes that she would explore me more deeply. I was rewarded by her finger entering me, maybe as far as the first knuckle. It was just enough to send shivers up my spine in anticipation of more to come.