Groggy and disoriented I am awakened by the sound of my alarm. Its midnight, I'm up. I take a few minutes on the side of my bed to collect my thoughts and find my glasses. When I fell asleep at 8:30, I had made plans with myself to shower, shave and reapply all of my makeup. Well, I sort of changed my mind when I stumbled out of bed in the middle of the night. I don't think I even brushed my hair. I threw on some loose fitting cargo khakis with a tight soft cotton burnt orange tank top, foregoing the bra all together. I couldn't even tell you what shoes I picked out. Took a few seconds to brush my teeth and look for my car keys.
I grab a small blue fleece throw from the back of my couch and lock the front door behind me.
"I'm leaving" I text.
"Okay, see you soon" she replys.
Have I told you about the woman I do this for? Well, actually I do it for me. I'm the woman I do this for. I do it for those feelings. The tingly love drunk feelings. The ones I don't get from anyone else. The feelings I risk everything for to have. The girl in this story is the same girl in all of my stories. If I could have it my way she would be my forever girl. The one in the last chapter of my life story. But, here I am sneaking around as I have been the last year and a half. I am well aware that my girl will be unavailable to me for 11 days because of her impending vacation. I am desperate to get any time with her before she leaves.
Now, I didn't walk the whole 7 miles to see her. I drove most of It and parked my car in an empty lot near her work. Not a single person on the highway at 1am and not a single business open. I grab my blue throw blanket and shove it in my big purse, toss my little jacket on and shut my old heavy car door as softly as possible and set out in the dark, my phone lightly lighting my way.
Here I am, walking at 1am down a quiet dark single lane road like a love junky in search of my dealer. Usually at this hour I'm driving to her, not walking. I guess it doesn't really matter, driving or walking, I'm out and about in the wee hours of the morning looking for my fix.
"I'm here" I text her as I walk through the back of the lot. "Is it unlocked" I inquire?
Just then I see her peak her head out of the back door of her car. "Come here lover" she says.
It's dark in that portion of the small lot, only a few lights in the distance from the neighborhood near by. I scurry, quietly over to her white SUV and hop in the back, quietly closing the door behind me. She has made the entire back portion of her high end SUV into a comfy little bed, complete with pillows. It's dark in the back of the vehicle. There is a little bit of light from the stars which are shining through the large moon roof. I can just make out her silhouette next to me. She's in her casual night clothes. Loose pants, loose shirt. Shes so pretty wearing her tired eyes.
She reaches for me and we embrace for a moment. Quietly, I lay back into the blankets. She is close to me, resting on her right arm, locked in a silent gaze with me hovering just over the top of me. I raise my head up to kiss her lips. We meet in the middle and the craving that burns night and day in my brain is satisfied.
