Part 13 - Stress Release
Amy decided that it was time for bed for the both of us, and we both bid goodnight to our parents. I was pretty tired as I completely undressed and got into bed. Amy had a quick shower and soon joined me. The sheets were still slightly damp from this morning, but neither of us was really bothered. Amy said she would change the sheets tomorrow after work.
"So how are you feeling really?" Amy asked as she held me, one hand stroking my hair.
"Better with you next to me. But earlier I felt like such a child and realised that even though I am technically an adult, life without friends really left me unprepared for the responsibilities I have accepted in the last week."
"Life can be pretty tough for most people, even if you were 30; I still think you have had to deal with a lot."
"Do you think maybe I have rushed into things?" I asked quietly, both afraid of the answer and Amy's reaction. She was silent for a moment but did not stop her movements.
"Over the past few days I have felt closer to you, the feelings I have for you are so new and wondrous and the happiest I have ever felt. But now that your parents have adopted me, I feel truly part of a family. So close in fact that ever since I have called them mom and dad, it has felt so normal that tomorrow I want to go somewhere I change my surname to Green." This shocked me, but it made me so happy to hear her say it.
"I don't know what to say, that sounds so beautiful. The fact you have only known us for less than a week, that we have made you so welcome as to want to change your name. But don't you think it is a bit soon?"
"Exactly my point Sophie. So far everything that has happened as been the right thing, until a few days ago, I was still questioning it, but when the idea came about changing my name, I just thought, why fight it, whatever happens, can sometimes happen for a reason, we just have to take each day, learn from our mistakes and try new things. So we take life as it comes, sometimes it has it's up's, like us being together is definitely up there at the very top of great, then life has it's down's, like the pressure and sadness you feel by starting a friendship with Melissa. Melissa sounds to me like she could be the best friend you could ever have, you have things in common and you can really help her."
"But you are my best friend Amy, only you."
"I agree Sophie, but what we have is different from what you and Melissa have. We have a bond of love, a love that no one can take from us, as long as we remain honest and true to each other, nothing can change that. Melissa is a different type of friend, she is someone who you can confide in, and she can do the same with you, which she has done trustingly with you already. And I am very proud of you that the first thing you wanted to do with Melissa, apart from make friends, was to help her, and so far you are doing it very well. But one day, you will tell her that you are gay, and that I am your partner, and when you tell her, she will be happy for you, because that is what best friends do."
"Not all friends. Look at Claire; she turned her back on you when you told her."
"Over the years I think part of me understood why. When Claire asked me if I liked her and when I told her I did, I think she got scared when she became aggressive towards me and gay people. I think she may have had feelings for me as well, but was just too scared to admit it. Maybe like me if she had time to think things through, she may have come to like me in that way or just be happy to be just friends. But she had already done the worst thing she could ever do to a person, especially me, and decided to just stay away. Over the last few years since I became a teacher, seeing all the children laugh and play, sharing secrets, standing up for each other, I have been remembering all the good times Claire and I had. I wondered what it might be like to try and find her, maybe now we are both adults we can discuss it maturely. I even think from a therapist's point of view it may give me closure on the pain I have felt all these years."
