The following is an excerpt from my journal. It is about an experience I had with a very close friend of mine. It's all true. Every word of it happened to me. It all came straight from my journal and is unedited. As a grammarian, my grammar in it really bothers me, but what I didn't want to lose the meaning by editing it.
It is less about sex than it is about the connection we shared through sex. If you are looking for a story with more eroticism, I would suggest looking for another. There is more about our connection than they actual sex we had and the decriptions of our sexual acts are not detailed.
Happy reading, and please let me know what you think of it, this is my frist submission so comments and suggestions would be greatly appreciated!!!
Thanks for reading!!!
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What the hell was that? Did that seriously just happen? Is this really how my year is going to start? What the fuck.
So there we were, lying in bad and she was rubbing my back. I don't remember how that happened, but whatever; I probably said something about being jealous because I think he was rubbing her back. I don't know... Wait, how did I end up in her bed in the first place? ............. I think she pulled me in......... It was a joke though...... right? Wasn't she joking when she did it? ............... Shit, was that her plan? A joke to get me lying next to her? So she could try something new? No. Can't be. She's too torn up about it. No way she planned that. No way...
So she was rubbing my back. It felt damn good too, it's being a while since I had a good backrub. Then she started running her nails very lightly across my back, my shoulders, and my sides. Now that felt really good. That's when my brain turned on:
-Whoa, what's this? Is she... No, it's just a friendly backrub –
Just a friendly backrub, that's all, just a couple of close friends who feel comfortable with each other.
- Wait, that's my ass... -
Shut up, brain, her hand just slipped or something. Friends! That's what we are, friends. Damn, that feels nice though...
- Damn, that feels nice. -
She was running her hands all over me. All over my back, my sides, my shoulders, my stomach, my ass, and around to, but not touching my tits. I could feel her breathing into my back. Caught in the moment, I wanted to turn around and kiss her. No, had to take a step back, her boyfriend was lying right next to us.
- Oh. Fuck. Her boyfriend. She. Has. A. Boy. Friend. Gotta stop. Can't stop. Should stop. Don't wanna stop. Need to stop. STOP! ...... Can't.
I couldn't stop what was happening. I couldn't stop my hips from gyrating backwards into her. I couldn't stop my heavy breathing.
- Is he in on this too? That's why she's breathing into my back; he's behind her doing something to her. They planned this. They so fucking planned this. -
I wouldn't reciprocate. She was drunk. I didn't want to feel like I was taking advantage of her. God damn it felt good.
- If you don't touch her, she'll think you're not enjoying it. -
I reached my arm behind and started rubbing her leg. It was the only thing I could reach from that angle. Good choice though. Nice ass. Really nice ass.
- Fuck. She has a nice ass. -
I want to say that I had no idea where it was going, but I did. Did I want to go there? I honestly have no idea. I still thought it was all part of a plan. They wanted to have a threesome. I knew that. She's told me that. That's what they were doing; they were using me as their third. I suppose that's a compliment, it shows that they trust me. Could I do it though? Could I really, honestly, seriously, go through with it? No. Had to stop it before it got out of hand. I couldn't though. I couldn't stop it. I didn't want to be a third. I'm tired of all this random bullshit.
- This is really happening, isn't it. Am I really about to go through with this? God this feels so good. God. Damn. -
Then she got up. She mumbled something but I couldn't understand what it was. I looked to my left towards him to see his reaction......... He was asleep. Or at least he appeared to be. If he was asleep... Then... What?
- @#$%^&*)_+@#$%^&*()_+@#$%^&*(_@#$%^&*()@#$%^&*( -
My thoughts were jumbled. I had no idea what was going on. What the hell was going on? What was I not stopping? Why was she not stopping? She's a straight girl who's a little bi-curious. She likes to experiment with sex and push her limits. .... ok, that's bullshit. She's bi. I knew she was bi long ago. That curious thing and wanting to push her limits, that's what she says and maybe what she thinks, but she's bi. I know she's bi. Deep down she knows she's bi. She's just simply bi.
She came back into the bedroom and pulled me into the living room. We talked ...... A lot. That's what we do. We are obsessive compulsive conversationalists. We talk. More than anyone I know, I might add.
After we talked, I figured that would be the end of it. We would go to sleep and that would be it. We'd probably talk about it again, but that's just what we do, we talk.
We were lying down – again - to go to sleep - again. She had her arm wrapped around me and I was holding her hand. We were comforting each other. We'd just had a long, very deep, talk about what everything that just happened could possibly mean. We needed to comfort each other.
Then it started again. She was touching me, I was touching her. Our hands were everywhere. We still hadn't kissed though. I'm a pussy. I can't kiss someone. I can't do it. Fear of rejection, I suppose. I rolled over, facing her now, our faces so close together. I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to so badly. But her boyfriend. What we were doing was wrong already. I've already destroyed one relationship; I can't do that to another couple. I can't.
- Just do it. Kiss her. You want to. You're already touching her; you already have your hands all over her. -
But it's like kissing someone is more much more intimate than touching. I know that sounds weird, but really it's like when I kiss someone it means more.
- Your hands are down her pants, just kiss her. -
I can't. Her boyfriend. I don't want to mess things up with them. That's not fair. They're good together. They're happy. I can't do that to them. It's wrong.
- Kiss her. Look at her, she wants you to. She's scared to. You're supposed to be the more experienced one.
