Meant to Be

Standing in front of the counter at the Cookie Factory, I place my order of a slice of cookie cake with a small diet coke as I always had in the past.

"That'll be $4.82 please."

Handing her a five dollar bill I think to myself, that's quite a bit more than the last time I indulged.

"Which design would you like?"

Glancing at all the frosting designs, I quickly spot the one. "Rainbow, please, always the rainbow."

I leave the Cookie Factory with my treats and walking briskly, I enter the food court and sit down at the first table near the front. After finishing my treats I leave the food court quickly before I decide to order another cookie! I guess this is what happens when one is away for too long. Being a weekday and still early, I feel as though I have the mall to myself although a few other shoppers are here enjoying this quiet morning as well. Opting to take the stairs instead of the escalator, I head up to the top floor and walk towards the Penny's end. There are a couple of stores I want to check out before leaving.

Staying to the left, I'm pleased with myself for remembering where the movie store is. I guess after working at a store downstairs for almost two years, one wouldn't soon forget where other stores are located even two years after the fact. I walk into the movie store and begin browsing the new releases. Purchasing season one of the Showtime show, "Dexter" for a friend and I Am Legend for myself, I ask if I can leave the movies behind the counter so I don't have to carry the bag around with me. My closest friend, Teri and I talk on the phone at least once a week to keep in touch over the past two years, and recently she mentioned to me "Dexter" is her new favorite show so I can't wait to see her face tomorrow when she sees what I bring her. I'm nearing my next stop when the woman walking a store's distance ahead of me suddenly drops a small piece of paper. She's busy fishing around in her purse, two big shopping bags dangling from her arms and obviously didn't notice.

"Miss?" I call out, walking a longer stride and reaching down to pick up the piece of paper. It's a yellow post it note. "Miss, you dropped..."

The woman stops and I hurry to catch up to her, not paying much, if any attention to her. "Here." I hand her the post it note. It's folded in half, but appears to have a phone number written inside.

"Oh, thank you, I wouldn't want to lose that."

"Sure, no problem," I reply on auto pilot, preparing to walk into my next stop which we now happen to be standing in front of.

As I pass the entrance into the store I hear, "Casey?"

Upon hearing my name, I turn to really look at this woman who obviously knows me. She's a bit taller than I, 5'8" possibly 5'9" and she has long wavy blonde hair which stops at her lower back. Her bangs have obviously met with a curling iron this morning, but it's her blue eyes that instantly captivate me, they are a very pretty shade of blue. Standing before me dressed in the shortest jean shorts with a green halter top, I admire the dark tan knowing she visits a tanning salon because it's only April, the last few days happen to be in middle 60's. Looking into those seductive blue eyes once more it suddenly hits and I do mean HITS me who she is. My jaw drops as my eyes bulge wide, "Ashley?"

"Oh, my goodness, Casey it really is you! How are you?"

She drops the bags, hurries into the store arms stretched out ready for a hug. It takes every bit of will I can muster to close my gaping mouth. We share a hug and leading me by the arm, she picks up her purse and bags and heads to the sitting bench around the fountain outside of the store, my eyes fixated on her bubbly expression as she talks the whole way.

"How long has it been? Ten years," she says laughing and releasing me from her sweet embrace to sit down and cross her long legs.

"Just over four years," I reply suddenly thinking I should sit down and stumbling a bit to even accomplish this simple task.

Trying desperately to regain some semblance of composure I casually ask, "So how have you been Ashley?"

"Doing well, thank you," as she runs her fingers through her long blonde hair. "I really look different don't I? Your expression was priceless!" She begins laughing. I notice the gentle rise and fall of her breasts while she laughs, the way her head tilts back exposing her neck. I smile self consciously replying, "Well after seeing you brunette for eleven years, yes it's certainly a shock."

If only she knew the real reason behind my surprised expression. "You look beautiful as always."

Her blue eyes sparkle as she receives my genuine complement. "Thank you Casey." She turns her body more to the side so she is facing me directly, her legs still crossed. "I wasn't sure it was you at first Casey, you look fantastic!"

"Thank you," I reply with great pride.

"You looked cute with glasses, but without is a welcomed change and your body oh la la, very sexy girl," she says playfully nudging me.

"Thank you," I respond in a low voice blushing all the while, but managing to maintain eye contact, barely. I glance at my watch which reads 11:22 am.

"I'm sorry am I keeping you?" She uncrosses her legs as she prepares to stand.

"No," I say so quickly I nearly startle myself. I have a habit checking the time too often and it's made worse when I'm nervous. I clear my throat. "No, not at all," I answer as cool and calm as I can possibly manage.

Boy I haven't felt this awkward since shortly after high school. Ashley settles, crossing her long slender legs once again, her facial expression visibly relaxes as she folds her hands in her lap and that's when I see it, a gold band with a small diamond on her left hand. My heart literally stops beating causing an instant pain in my chest. I force myself to smile as one should do at a time like this, disguising my true expression, and covering up my very honest feelings. "Congratulations."

She looks confused for a second before following my eyes and looking down. Her face flushes and she begins turning the ring in circles around her finger. "Thank you," following ever so quickly with, "Do you work here in the mall or just shopping around?"

Finding her actions strange, I look down and realize I'm wearing close to my old work attire. A pair of khaki slacks with a black silk blouse. "Visiting, browsing. I did work at store downstairs for nearly two years while attending college."

"Oh yes JCCC, I considered attending there."

In my home state here in the Midwest there are only a few good colleges and they are spread out. Obviously she hadn't gone to my school, but she wasn't offering anymore details so I let it go. For now.

"What did you study?"

"I just got a liberal arts degree before moving to California."

Her eyes widen. "You live in California?" she asks excitedly.

"Yes, Los Angeles."

She leans in closer. The smell of her perfume is intoxicating, the scent similar to vanilla. I take this opportunity to breathe in deeper, savoring the sweet scent.

"I've lived in New York and here in the Midwest, but would you believe I haven't even visited California?"

"Well I haven't been to New York, but I imagine it has terrible traffic like L.A. but instead of cars it's a string of yellow cabs."

"Yes that sums it up nicely," she replies chuckling. "So are you still finding your way around town after two years?"

"Of course, I rented a car and am staying with my mother while visiting family and friends."

"Teri?"

"Absolutely," I say so matter of fact it causes Ashley to burst with laughter.

Again her head tilts back and I seize the opportunity to scoot a bit closer to her.

"Ever since fourth grade you two have been inseparable, like two peas in a pod," she chuckles dabbing her eyes.

This time it's Ashley who notices the time.

"Oh shoot, I'm late." Jumping up, she grabs her purse and bags. "It was really good to see you again."

My heart sinks while my mind thinks fast my only thought blares at me like a siren. Don't let her go. As we hug goodbye, I decide this is the time.

"Perhaps we can get together for dinner tonight or tomorrow if you have the time?" I ask surprisingly calm despite the siren going off in my head.

Her eyes sparkle as she nods. "Tonight would be great. 8:00 I've been craving Chili's since seeing their commercial on TV."

"Chili's sounds good. I'll meet you there." I'm congratulating myself on my seemingly outward confidence.

"Casey would you mind picking me up? My friend needs my car this evening."

"Sure."

Her smile causes my heart to beat faster. Ashley tells me the address and we briefly hug before her departure. In the last few years, I hadn't given Ashley much thought. It obviously took time in the beginning after realizing Ashley wouldn't be attending college around here. I was truly devastated. Teri clearly remembers how upset I was. Walking through the parking garage to my car, I flash back to how all of this began back in second grade.

At the start of that school year, Ashley was the new kid having come to us from New York. When the teacher introduced her to the class I felt drawn to her for some reason. I knew I wanted to be her friend, but I was really shy although this seemed different from my regular shyness. The teacher thankfully sat her next to me and we made small talk occasionally, but nothing really more than that. At recess, all the other kids circled around her with questions because here in the Midwest, her being from New York made her a real novelty. I was perfectly content looking in from the outside.

In high school, with my teenage hormones running on high, I felt drawn to her in another way as well. Now more than ever I was finding it hard to even simply say hello when we passed in the halls or saw one another in classes. Teri always told me I should make a move, but I could never work up the nerve. Besides if she didn't want to go out with me, what if she freaked and wanted nothing whatsoever to do with me. I simply couldn't risk the hello's and smiles in class for at best a chance for something more. Once college started nobody knew what happened to Ashley, she literally had disappeared.

Realizing the decision on what to wear this evening lies ahead, I quickly get into the car and leave the mall dialing Teri's number on my cell to inform her of my unexpected fortune. I have only eight hours before dinner.

"Just breathe in and out, come on do it with me."

I couldn't help but laugh as Teri inhales deeply and exhales loudly over the line. I switch my cell to my other hand as I turn right at the last stoplight before nearing my destination. "I'm almost there."

"Just remember you look great and open your mouth to speak otherwise your thoughts won't be heard."

"Haha."

"Hey you know it's true."

What I did know was that I was comfortable with my outfit. I had decided on my sexiest pair of jeans which hang perfectly off my hips, a solid color nice shirt with my hair hanging in a simple ponytail. My two inch black heels thankfully replace my nervousness with confidence.

"I wish you the best tonight and I can't wait to see you tomorrow," Teri says as I park in front of the house. "It's been so long!"

"I'm looking forward to it and thank you. Where would I be without you?"

"Still stuck in the fourth grade!"

"Here she comes, gotta go."

"Bye, good luck!"

Ashley smiles and waves as she approaches the car. I wave back admiring her outfit and let's be honest her body as well. A rather short jean skirt with a tank top, her hair styled but freefalling. A sound similar to a moan escapes between my lips as my mind pictures my fingers running through her long soft hair. I swallow hard and then swallow hard again as she opens the door and climbs in.

"Hi."

Oh those sexy, smooth legs which seem to never end. "Hello."

"Chili's still okay? I'm so hungry, I skipped lunch."

"I have been looking forward to it," I say smiling before pulling the car away from the curb.

"I'm glad." Her hand lightly rests on my thigh causing a jolt to run the course of my body. "I'm really happy you invited me to dinner," she continues.

Her hand slowly begins caressing my thigh. The gentleness of her touch causes my right foot to press down, accelerating steadily. This can't be what it seems, Ashley is a touching and caring individual who makes a lot of contact with her friends; in high school when didn't I see her hugging a friend? Or perhaps she too is a little nervous, it's certainly been awhile!

"Calm down," I scold myself.

I desperately want to look at her face, but can't make myself do it so my eyes shift to the right and back again. Her hand still on my thigh suddenly squeezes and before I can control myself, a light moan escapes between my lips while my eyes involuntarily close. Thinking quickly, I clear my throat hoping this would pass as the reason for the sound. I force my thoughts and feelings to the side ordering myself to act and treat Ashley like anyone else.

Once inside Chili's, I follow Ashley to the table, my heart pounding every step along the way. I feel lightheaded with all the emotions coursing through me after the interesting to say the least car ride. I can't help but notice as we sit at our table, other customers, men and women alike, look at Ashley. I'm obviously not the only one who finds her beautiful. The waiter immediately arrives to take our drink order starting with Ashley.

"Strawberry daiquiri please."

Upon hearing this, I decide to splurge a bit.

"Perfect margarita."

I try to present myself as calm, but I'm growing more uneasy by the moment hoping I don't look similar to a deer caught in the headlights. Since leaving the mall earlier in the day, I had been counting down every minute on the clock until I was due to pick up Ashley. Now here we are at the restaurant and I become aware that I'm softly shaking. Once we have our drinks, the waiter asks our orders again beginning with Ashley.

"Alright, excellent choice. And for you miss?"

"I'll have the grilled chicken salad with fat free ranch."

"Okay, I'll get your orders in."

"Oh, can you make sure the dressing is on the side please."

"No problem."

"Thanks."

Ashley sits with her elbows on the table, hands together her chin resting on top of her hands. "Are you always so careful with what you eat?"

My heart flutters as she tilts her head to the side when asking her question, the way her brow rises. "I simply watch what I eat so I don't ever have to diet again. I like to think moderation instead of deprivation."

She smiles at this.

"I also do a lot of little things like parking further away from the door, always opting to take the stairs, and when I do go to a fast food joint, I order inside instead of driving through."

Ashley leans forward a little more causing her top to pull away from her chest exposing quite a bit of cleavage. I take a good look unable to control myself. I was well aware going in that appearing calm and controlled this evening would be the most difficult challenge I would have to face in my young life.

"Moderation does sound like the key. When some of my friends have gone on diets, they starve themselves and then before you know it, they're eating everything in sight gaining back not only the weight they lost, but adding on even more."

"Exactly," I say nodding my head.

Her eyes seem even bluer as she looks at me. Growing more nervous as her eyes linger, I take a sip of my drink just as she says with a wink, "You look fantastic Casey, you have quite the body."

I set my glass down as quickly as possible without spilling any, coughing but able to nearly avoid choking which would have caused a much greater scene. Still coughing, Ashley reaches across the table grasping my left hand and holding onto it, asks me if I'm okay.

"Swallowed wrong," I easily lie. I clear my throat a final time and it's now I feel the heat in my cheeks thinking, I must be beet red.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asks genuinely concerned.

"Yes, I do believe so." Her hand is still holding mine it dawns on me. It's so soft and relaxing. As if reading my mind, she gently squeezes my hand causing a soft moan from me. I look up from our hands into her radiant face in time to see her wink at me. "So what have you been up to since high school?" I ask in a rush.

"A lot," she exhales, "Most of it good, some of it not. It amazes me how quickly these past four years have flown by. Tell me more about California, what do you do?"

"I'm still excited when pulling out of the driveway to see palm trees all around and mountains in the distance. I have always enjoyed the sight of palm trees. When I was younger, my family and I would travel to Florida and my favorite memories are of palm trees."

She nods while smiling. Our waiter arrives with our food and Ashley removes her hand, but rather slowly I note. After checking to see if we need anything further, we are left alone once again. I think back to all my past dinner dates and how cool, calm, and collected I was compared to this evening, but then again the person sitting across the table wasn't Ashley.

"And what do you do?" Ashley asks before taking her first bite.

"I work from home. You could say I work to find ways to keep comfortable while sitting in front of a computer for at least eight hours."

"Nice to see the computer classes are paying off."

We both laugh.

"I'm sure I've done Mrs. Stevenson proud."

"I'll bet."

The question I want to ask most is in the front of my mind and I figure now is as good a time as any to ask. "Ashley?" I pause, working up every bit of courage I can muster, preparing myself for her answer, not entirely sure I really want to ask the question, but continuing nonetheless. "What happened after graduation?" Her face remains the same not relinquishing any clues; instead she takes another bite of her food. I push on. "I heard you would be going to the same college as I, but then suddenly you seemed to just disappear."

We lock eyes before she answers, "I guess you could say life happened." She chuckles softly. "As you know my family moved here to the Midwest in time for second grade. The memories I had of New York were all good, so naturally I missed home. Through middle and high school my folks were going through a difficult time as was I and all I wanted was to go back to New York. After graduation, I did exactly that."

We both resume eating and I know she won't be elaborating further, but I'm content at the moment. I certainly have more questions particularly concerning the ring she is wearing, but right now all I want to do is enjoy a nice quiet dinner with the woman of my dreams. When the waiter arrives to remove our dishes, I'm sharing with Ashley an embarrassing story that had happened to me shortly after arriving in L.A. I have her in stitches. She finishes her strawberry daiquiri as I finish my story. Still chuckling to herself, she grabs her purse while her left arm reaches across the table, her soft hand coming to a rest on top of mine again. This time a spark generates the moment our skin makes contact. Like static electricity during the dry winter months except this shock isn't painful instead it's absolute pleasure. Butterflies swarm about in my tummy, but an even greater jolt takes me by surprise a little further below my tummy. Time seems to stop at this very instant, Ashley's eyes holding mine captive, but in reality only a few second pass.

"I'll be right back." Smiling she runs her fingers down my hand, stands and heads in the direction of the ladies room.

"What just happened?" my mind screams.

I tell myself not to jump to conclusions, I'm sure her actions weren't meant the way I am interpreting them. Two women having dinner and casually touching is perfectly normal. My mind calms when thinking if every time women touched or showed simple affection meant what my mind leapt to just then, every woman in the world would be gay or at least bisexual. Ashley doesn't return for a few minutes which is a blessing because it allows me time to settle down. I notice however the smile on her face as she approaches the table is different, sexier. Her stride exudes confidence, her hips swing a bit more. So much for my mind having calmed down a moment ago.