Before reading this chapter, that covers a ten year period of my life, it's strongly recommended that you read "And Hubby Watched," "Single Again" and "Those Fucking Years," as well as the previous chapters of this series. They will add important information to my bi activities and give more of an insight into the breakdown of my marriage.
There's a very old saying in the advertising industry.
"Never fuck a client."
Well I did but then I married him.
Just after my thing with Marcia I was put onto a new account the agency had won. By most standards it was quite a small account. Just the size for a young, female fresh from leaving university after two years, copywriter to earn her stripes on. I earned more than my stripes, though, for the effort I put into the account. I also earned the client who owned the packaging business for which I was writing the copy.
Kevin was some nine years older than me. From the first time I met him at the presentation I was enamoured by him. He was handsome, witty, confident and outgoing yet considerate and caring, very understanding and keen to please. He had that aura about him that many self-made, successful businessmen have. A sort of assuredness that's almost arrogance but not quite. He was seemingly comfortable no matter who he was with. He always had the right word or phrase and was totally comfortable when in the spotlight.
We hit it off right away. We developed an easy way of relating to each other and of working together. And we worked together very closely in the early days of the account. So closely that for a while I spoke to him on the phone several times a day as we developed the ad campaign. So close that we had meetings probably every other day. Close so that these meeting started taking place in the late afternoon or early evening either at his offices in Mayfair or at the agency in Covent Garden. And so close that we gradually ended the meetings with a drink or a quick bite to eat.
The result, though, was worth the effort for between us we produced some great copy that really worked well for the account when the campaign eventually broke some months later.
It also worked well on other levels as well. Just as our working relationship had gradually developed so had the way we related to each other. We became more relaxed. We started to flirt. Jokes and double entendres became the norm. The normal client copywriter handshake when we met or parted became a kiss on the cheek. And that led to one kiss not being on the cheek but on the lips. And that led to his arm not resting against my side but going round me. And that led to us not having a space between our bodies but to mine being pulled tightly against his. And one evening that led to us not going our separate ways after the meeting but to me going back to his flat. And of course that led to me breaking that cardinal rule of advertising, for I did fuck the client. And I fucked him and he fucked me after that first time on a frequent basis. Like nearly every day for a month or so!
I fell totally and utterly head over heels in love with him. No ifs or buts, no reservations or concerns. I was gone and gone completely. He was all that I wanted and everything I'd ever dreamed about. And that led to me moving in with him to the consternation at first of my parents. But then as Kevin always could he charmed them and soon they were taking his side in any arguments between us as opposed to mine.
We got married and I had Sarah. I thought things would go on being wonderful for ever and for a few years they did. Not only did I never look at anyone else, male or female, but I never even entertained any thoughts in those directions. I was physically and emotionally totally faithful to him and I thought he was to me. And I thought that's how it'll always be.
Wrong!
I caught him being unfaithful and I thought my world would end. It didn't of course and he talked me into forgiving him. A couple of years later I suspected him again and then a little later I found out that he was for sure. Although we stayed together for Sarah's sake the magic had gone. We did, though, try to save it. We did things that we felt or, more accurately, Kevin persuaded me might, perk things up. Spice up the failing relationship, bring some of the magic back. Things like him taking glamour photos of me, having sex in places where we might get caught and trying out some sexual diversions such a tying up and mild S & M.
He also after lengthy cajoling and persuasion got me to make love to another woman while he watched. Jenny was her name and doing that in front of him was the symbolic end of our marriage.
The actual end, though didn't come for another year or so. During that time I was sure that he was "at it" again but I didn't have the evidence. The moment I got it though, my courage was raised and I kicked him out. And that very night I made love to a neighbour. I had sex with a woman I'd known for some time, Toni, and it was a fantastic cleansing process.
So after Marcia my involvement with other women went on hold until Jenny and that must have been a good eight years later. And after her there must have been a further break of three or four years until Toni and the night my marriage ended.
Living alone with Sarah in a lovely apartment in Docklands waiting for my divorce to come through I had to adjust to being alone. It was hard. It was very, very hard. But I did it. I lasted the year it took for the divorce to come though without once having sex. I just could not bear the idea of having to develop any sort of new relationship. Of having to play that silly role of getting to know someone well enough to have sex with them. It also seemed unfair on my daughter so I stayed away from it. I vowed to "stay pure" and untouched until after the divorce was finalised and I did that.
I'd sort of assumed that once I was a free and single woman everything would be fine sexwise. I'd expected that once divorced I'd be able to "fuck 'em and leave 'em" as the modern woman seems to be able to do. But somehow I couldn't. Somehow the idea of sex purely for pleasure or relief didn't work for me. Whilst, after what Kevin had done to me, I didn't want any deep emotional involvement with men I found that sex without it wasn't that successful. So I had a fairly difficult time during this period that I called, "those fucking years."
In some ways during those years and since the divorce my sex life has been more successful with "my girls" than it has with men. And the first of those after the divorce was with Sherry.
With this I can claim little outside influences and certainly naivety did not play a part. It was totally down to her and me. The her in question this time was, of all things, a female tennis coach. We'd known each other her for years and we'd seen each other marry, have children and separate from our husbands. When I was very active on the county tennis scene and played for Essex I got to know most of the leading UK tennis girls and the rumours of fairly rampant lesbianism are, I can assure you, true. Whilst Sherry was never in that category, (and, before you ask neither was I in any way) she had always had a rather risquΓ© reputation.
After my break up from Kevin I spent more time at the tennis club and resurrected a number of old friendships including Sherry. Nothing more than tennis and the occasional drink afterwards or the meeting at club dos. It was at one of these after I "re-emerged" that I was dancing next to her in a circle of girls, yes very Essex but no handbags! As the music changed we were together dancing and she took me in her arms for a jive. After, we sat at the bar and she asked how things were after the divorce and I was telling her that I was now "back on the scene" and had seen a few men but that there was no one special. We talked for ages as old friends, I thought, for I had never had any feeling that she had ever come onto me or had any interest in me as a sexual partner.
We played tennis together a few times and then we were both at a party. Again, we chatted a lot and danced together not in any way sexual I assure you. I told her that I had split from my latest, (well 2nd), beau and that I was no longer seeing anyone and mentioned how unsatisfactory I found the dating game. Sitting there in a quiet part of the house away from anybody I was absolutely, as they say, gobsmacked when she looked right into my eyes and said almost expressionlessly.
"Maybe Mandy, it's time you and I had an affair."
Totally shocked I replied rather inanely. "And why do you say that Sherry?" as I frantically tried to gather my thoughts.
"Well I think we are both lost soles in this rather messy world and that we might be able to help each other."