Isla and I had finally ended up in bed together. I'd wanted her virtually from the day she and her husband had moved in next door, but it hadn't been easy to get to her. I knew she was interested because I'd seen her spying on me with Tina, my part time lover. It was clear that seeing us had turned her on, but it isn't easy for a married woman to admit, even to herself, that she found watching other women kissing and playing to be arousing, and I understood that. So the next day I pandered to the voyeur in her and the exhibitionist in me and masturbated naked in my back yard, knowing that she would see and hoping it would spark an interest in me. It did, although she tried not to let me see her by hiding in the darkness of her garden shed and peering at me through the window, but I could tell that she was doing exactly the same thing - playing with herself in the assumed security of that shed.
I didn't let on that I'd seen her, not at the time anyway, but a day or two later I invited her round for coffee under the guise of neighbourliness, and that was when I told her that I knew she'd watched me, and that I didn't mind. She was a bit taken aback to put it mildly, especially when I let her know that I'd seen her too, but then she became more and more turned on at the thought. Soon we were doing it again, but this time at the opposite ends of the same couch. The step from there to the bedroom was almost a foregone conclusion.
Even so, it still wasn't a done deal and I had to take things very slowly. We kissed and caressed and I played with her, but she didn't make any attempt to touch me anywhere that mattered. I was beginning to worry that it might be all one-way traffic, but then she'd suddenly asked me if I would invite her for coffee again so that she could learn more about being with a woman. That was a bit unexpected, but too right I would, because then I figured we would get it together properly. I handed her the requested invitation, and then I'd expected her to come round "for coffee" the following afternoon.
We hadn't arranged an exact time, so when she didn't appear after lunch I wasn't too bothered. But as time wore on and she still didn't show up I got more and more frustrated, until finally I had to accept that I was being stood up and I eased my frustration by practising a little diy. I had been so sure she'd turn up too. Never mind, I thought, perhaps something had come up and she'll be around tomorrow instead. But she wasn't. In fact I didn't see hide or hair of her for the next three days. Mind you, the weather wasn't that good, so I kind of convinced myself that was the reason.
I talked on the phone about it with Tina (she knows I have other women and isn't jealous because she has her husband), looking for a little sympathy and advice on how to get her back into my bed, but she gave it to me straight. Isla had chickened out. Giving in to her bi-tendencies had been more than her background could take, and she was simply avoiding me so that I'd work that out for myself without her having to tell me. I suppose I'd already known it, but it took Tina's forthright words to bring it home to me. I would have to shrug and move on, but I knew I would miss the fun that Isla and I might have had.
But it seems that Isla is nothing if not unpredictable, for the very next day, as I resigned myself to having all work and no play, there was a rather hesitant knock on my kitchen door. I knew immediately who it was, simply because no one else would call at my back door, and I'll readily admit to wondering how, or even if, I should answer it. But of course, I did.
'Hello.' She said, sounding very timid. 'Can I talk to you?'
'Of course.' I answered, trying not to look thrilled to see her.
I ushered her through into the lounge, wondering quietly where she would choose to sit. To my surprise she sat at the end of the sofa, exactly where she had the last time.
'Would you like a coffee?' I asked, trying to sound upbeat by adding. 'No strings attached.'
'Thank you, yes. But first can I say sorry?'
'You just did.' I told her, turning away to hide the smile I couldn't suppress. 'Apology accepted, and now I'll make some coffee.'
I think I could sense her smiling too as I made my way into the kitchen, but by the time I came back a couple of minutes later, the smile had gone and she was sitting with her knees together, looking very prim and very thoughtful. I guessed that whatever she wanted to say had been rehearsed a number of times over the last day or two. Even so we sat in silence for a few minutes. I let her stew.
'Look.' She said suddenly, half turning in her seat to look at me. 'After I got home I thought about what happened, and I don't think we should have done it.'
I sat and said nothing, hoping she'd go on. I thought I had an idea what had happened, it had been too much for her ingrained morality to handle all in one go and she was on a guilt trip. If that was the case, then maybe all was not lost.
'It's not fair on either of us.' She blurted. 'I can't start a full on thing with you. I'm married and you've got someone.'
'And?' I asked.
'And?' She echoed, thinking I meant "so what?".
'And there's more to it than that, isn't there?'
She went silent again. I don't think I was following her carefully thought out script.
'Didn't you enjoy what we did?' I prompted her.
'Yes.' She looked into my eyes and smiled wanly. 'That's the trouble.'
I raised my eyebrows in silent query.
