As I said I had found a part time job in a restaurant that cut into what time I had left over for dating. With Derek I didn't mind so much as I would at least still see him on Saturday night when the four of us double dated and ended the evening having a shag. I was envious of Jennifer as she certainly loved it, and when it was raining we were now spending more time in the confines if John's car, where we could at least cuddle and both Jenn and I would give our boyfriends a blow job. I was beginning to enjoy cock sucking more and more although I still didn't care for the taste of his cum, I was finding it easier to handle without gagging and could swallow it without too much trouble.
Emma's letters to me were now getting bolder as she liked to remind me of our 'sexcapades' in them, and continually asking me for the details of my dates with Jennifer and Derek. I found in writing to her it was easier to say things I would have difficulty saying to her face, and in a small way it gave me a thrill to be able to do that too.
In her letters she also began telling me about her 'dreams', where in her dreams it was always me who took the initiative and started the sex. Beginning at first by rubbing her through her clothes, then exposing her paps for me to please myself with them, pulling down or taking off her bloomers to get at her pussy, forcing her to kiss me and to pleasure me however I wanted it. She made it sound like in her dreams she didn't have much choice but to comply as I was too strong for her, and could make her do whatever I wanted. This was the beginning me being introduced to her 'kinky' or perverted interests.
Usually in her dreams it would begin with me attacking her from behind, like when she was bent over for some reason making the bed or whatever, and I would grab her hips and press my torso into her bum. I would rub myself against her before pulling up her skirt to fondle her through her bloomers, she gave the details how my hand would take hold of her vulva from behind to give it a squeeze before I'd caress it with my fingers, rubbing my hand over it from her belly, over her clit and pressing the material of her bloomers into her crevice and up the crack of her arse. I would repeat this rubbing her till she had her cum, before pulling them down to give me access to her bare pussy then 'do' her again.
In her dreams she would struggle and cry out as I 'forced' my attentions on her, and admitting to letting me have my way with her excited her too, and because of her love for me kept our affairs secret. Of course this was nonsense as I was much too introverted to do anything like that to her, at first it had always been her who would do those things to me, then insisting I do to her whatever she did to me.
There were other scenarios too, like I would take hold of her ankles and hold her legs up in the air for her as I would 'make' her give herself a rub, again through her bloomers at first, then on to exposing herself till she had two or three cums then I'd let them down. Another was similar where she'd hold her legs behind her knees to pull them back against her breasts and it would be me rubbing her pussy this time. She would describe exactly what she was wearing, where we were and what we were doing as well as the sex part, even to what I would do to her in her car when she was driving.
Sometimes I would be rough with her she said, other times gentle as a lamb and we would make beautiful love together, and it was always me who decided those things. In time I would visualise myself doing what she suggested in her letters, and often after reading them would actually fantasise I could do what she suggested, the thought would excite me and I would masturbate as I'd relive in my mind what was in her letters.
Needless to say I never thought what she suggested would ever happen, but in a way I was convincing myself I could actually do it, the mind is a powerful tool and I suppose some would call this brain washing. In the ten months or so since I'd left home I had changed quite a bit, coming out of my shell more and more with my freedom. Dressing better in more modern clothes, using makeup, wearing high heels and of course indulging in sex whenever I wanted. Jennifer had been a big influence too telling me how pretty I looked all dressed up, and the way others treated me with more respect than I would have received at home before. So I started to believe I could do the things Emma suggested.
I was excited to get the letter telling me when she would be coming for a visit one weekend arriving on the Friday evening, and to let her know if that was OK with me. I wrote back telling her I was looking forward to her visit of course, but that I had to work till 8 PM that Friday, but I could swap shifts with another waitress to have the Saturday off. Sunday was a normal day off for me anyway so that would give us the weekend together. She wrote back telling me she would book a cabin at that motel just north of the city so we could be together.
On the way down she stopped at the motel to book the cabin, and arrived at the restaurant just after 7 PM so she could have supper while waiting for me. Another waitress served her, and I was excited just seeing her there. She looked more feminine than I was used to, wearing a shirt waist type dress with buttons down the front showing some cleavage, more make up than I'd seen on her before and a double string neck lace with matching ear rings. She smiled when we made eye contact and I was looking forward to being with her again. Like I said, I had convinced myself that I could do what she had been hinting at in her so called dreams, but now I wasn't so sure, butterflies were doing a number in my stomach at the thought of it.