I turned sideways, grasped both of her hands in mine, and forced her to turn so she was facing me. Then, squeezing her hands tightly, I confessed. "I belong to someone, Barb."
"That's effing impossible!" was her immediate response. After a pause she added, "You only broke up with Jeff last weekend. You couldn't have another boyfriend already. At least not one with whom you could be serious, unless you were cheating on him at the same time he was cheating on you."
"No, it's not about a boyfriend, Barb. I actually met someone...another woman...just last weekend...and...well, we have...become rather close."
"I still say it's impossible. I know you too damn well. You couldn't get serious about anyone in one week...Unless you are simply picking up whomever comes along to get back at Jeff. If that's the case, and you want a woman, I can help you there. You know me better and I'm available.
"Damn, she and I talked about this and I said I would tell you everything. I thought it would be easier to explain. It's not a simple relationship, Barb. You missed the fact that I said I BELONG to someone. That someone just happens to be a woman.
"OK. I...You are right. I don't fucking understand. What do you mean by ...belong?"
I knew her reactions were coming from emotions, and knew I had to derail them immediately or a wonderful evening would be spoiled and quickly end. "You are going to have a lot of questions about what I tell you, but I'll probably cover most of them by the time I finish my story. Will you promise to listen and not say anything until I tell you that I am finished? It will be so much easier for me that way."
Recognizing the serious look on my face, Barb nodded assent, albeit reluctantly, as was obvious by the look on her face. Leaving out only a few details, such as my clothing requirements (or lack thereof), I explained how Kelly and I met quite by accident at Lisa's, how Kelly sensed that I had a submissive side and immediately started to dominate me, although I didn't realize what was happening at the time. I told her how I accepted Kelly's collar and went home with her. I also gave her some details about agreeing to submit to her for a month, without mentioning the contract. I also thought it best to not discuss the discipline part of our relationship or mention the word slave because that word has too many negative connotations. I told her that Kelly was the person I had moved in with and explained how she was making virtually all my decisions outside of work. I even revealed that she was the reason I got my body piercings without specifically mentioning the ones in my vagina. After nearly fifteen minutes, I said, "That's about it, Barb."
"Knowing you as well as I do, Kim, it's difficult to believe that (a) you have a submissive side, (b) you agreed to be someone's submissive for a month, and (c) that you pierced anything except your ears even though I can see the rings in your nipples. I have personally witnessed your strong, if not dominating, personality at work. I've watched you in negotiations with clients and interactions with fellow workers. You only give an inch if it is in the best interests of everyone concerned. Rarely do you lose."
"I can't disagree with you, Barb. I, too, find it difficult to believe everything that has happened. This last week has been like a whirlwind in my life. While I feel like I am living a dream, I am telling you the truth. It is real and, so far, I have enjoyed every minute of belonging to Kelly. I even call her Mistress or 'ma'am, out of respect." I then laughed and said, "In fact, since you know the truth, I will feel strange if I don't say 'mistress' when using her name. I truly enjoy being in her presence. Living with her is like living with a queen. She explained the dichotomy to me. I am so dominating while at work that I am willing, and probably even have a subconscious desire, to relinquish control to someone else, when away from the job. The D/s community has a saying that 'In bondage there is freedom.' I could never have believed or understood it without actually living it."
"Well, I sure as hell don't understand it." Her tone was still curt and bitter.
I tried to explain, "Essentially, by giving myself unconditionally to Mistress Kelly, by agreeing to obey any and all of her wishes and demands, I am forced to do things that I might subconsciously desire, even need, but would never consider doing voluntarily. It is utterly amazing how I feel when I walk into her house at the end of a work day. It's like I don't have a care in the world; like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I don't need to make decisions because I am literally not permitted to make any."
"For example?"
"There is no 'for example.' Mistress Kelly now makes EVERY decision FOR me that isn't directly related to my work. When you went to the restroom at lunch, I called her to ask what I should eat. Tonight has been an exception. She gave me freedom do be with you and do whatever I want. When I asked you to choose what I would eat for dinner tonight, I was using you as an extension of her. I have not selected what I have eaten for nearly a week. I can't explain it, but I love it. If this confession bothers you, I apologize, but it was fun having you make that decision for me."
"But can you just walk away at any time."
"You are absolutely correct, Barb. Mistress Kelly gave me what is called a 'safe word.' All I need to do is say it and tell her I want to quit. But, after being with her for a week, I don't have any desire to leave. I know it sounds crazy. One must experience it to fully realize the implications. It's really a matter of trust. I trust my mistress to never exceed my limits and she trusts me to keep my word by unconditionally honoring our agreement. It's only for one month and I want to see if I can really do it."
"Kim, as I said, knowing you as I do, I still find it difficult to believe your story. I can picture you reading about this type of scene in a book and simply relating it to me."
"I would never make up a story like that. There is no reason to. And what about my 'new look' as you call it?"
"Maybe you are trying to find an easy way to justify the change. Maybe you really don't want to make love to me and are saying you belong to this phantom mistress rather than tell the truth."
"Oh, gawd, Barb, that's not the case. As I said, I'd never lie to you like that. I don't need to 'justify' anything. I don't need to dream up some story. All I'd need to do is say that I wanted to change my image and you'd accept it. In addition, if I didn't want to make love to you, I'd be honest and tell you. You know me well enough to realize that. The truth is I do want to make love to you, and I want to do it tonight."
"Wouldn't that be cheating on your 'MISTRESS'?" she said sarcastically.
"Not if she knows and has given me permission."
"You can't be fucking serious!" she screamed.
"I am totally serious. That's why I went to my office when you invited me to dinner tonight. I said I had to make some phone calls. I only had to make one call: to Mistress Kelly to get permission to accept your offer. I didn't need her permission to go to dinner, but the fact that you wanted it to be a date made the difference.
We even discussed the possibilities of you and I spending the night together. She asked if I wanted to. I said that I really liked you and I indicated that it might be a possibility. She gave me permission to do whatever I want tonight. I will, of course, be obligated to tell her everything in the morning, and I do mean everything. There simply is no jealousy with her."