Angie stared into the remains of her pint of Directors, hoping that the dark amber liquid would hold the answers to the questions that were boiling inside her like bubbling lava.
She had absolutely no idea how she had ended up sitting in this bar, staking out the entrance of the hotel opposite. Oh, she knew the physical journey she had taken but the emotional journey was far longer and more complex.
Angie's home life could be frustrating in the extreme. She was still living with the woman she had loved for nearly 2 decades; they still adored each other, did everything together and wouldn't consider living apart but the intimacy had long since left their relationship.
Angie stayed because she loved her with all her heart and still had hopes that they'd regain the intimacy they had once shared, but living under the same roof as the person you lusted after constantly could be emotionally draining and inordinately frustrating.
She had considered having a fling elsewhere but even thinking about it set her conscience off. Angie had always been a very loyal person so she'd just never been able to go through with it.
As a form of release she tried the chat room scene but it just didn't do it for her, especially when it became blatantly obvious that many of the 'women' in the lesbian chat room were obviously either very confused about their own bodies or weren't really women at all.
Bored and home alone one day she thought she'd give it one last chance, but again she ended up chatting with someone who was so obviously a bloke it was hysterically funny to see his bumbling attempts at trying to appear female, so she declined the offer of private chat but kept him talking in the public chat room where everyone could see.
She threw all sorts of comments and suggestions his way to trip him up in his lack of knowledge concerning women in general and in particular the female anatomy and by the time he disappeared, presumably in an embarrassed huff, she was just about ready to fall of her chair with laughter.
Just as she was about to log off a message popped up for her.
"Been watching your chat. Loved the way you sent him packing, that'll teach him not to do his homework! Lol"
Angie responded and ended up talking to Billie for quite some time about all sorts of things, ranging from family, music, holidays and even their pets before Billie had to go, but her last message contained her email address and asked if they could continue to correspond outside of the chat room scene.
Angie wasn't sure what to do about this, after all she'd only initially been looking for a quick fix and certainly hadn't been looking for a pen pal, but after a couple of days she decided that she'd drop Billie a quick email just to say 'hi'. After all, it seemed rude to just ignore her; she'd seemed nice online and if she did turn out to be a psycho she could always change her email address.
Billie was thrilled that Angie had responded and soon a flurry of emails flew back and forth across the ether. Angie found it comforting to be able to confide in someone over her own frustration and disappointments regarding her home life and Billie in return shared much about her own situation and past experiences.
Billie explained that she had known she was gay from an early age and described her somewhat tumultuous early sexual experiences. She also told of how she had met her girlfriend and how the relationship had given her the confidence to come-out to her parents.
Billie's girlfriend was older than her by some years and as this was her first lesbian relationship, sometimes Billie worried that her partner wouldn't find the courage to tell her kids and friends about them.
Angie consoled her and encouraged her to have patience and explained how her lover would need time to come to terms with her newly found sexuality.
In return, Billie commiserated with Angie over her frustrating home life; encouraging Angie not to give up or lose hope.
Despite an age gap of nearly 20 years they got along fabulously. Angie had always been young at heart and Billie had a very mature head on her young shoulders, so somehow they complimented each other perfectly, each being able to offer a different perspective on any topic while never being judgemental or critical of each other.
Backwards and forwards the emails went, each revealing a little bit more about themselves; pictures were exchanged so that they could visualise who they were corresponding with and after a few short weeks a solid and caring friendship grew out of their emails.
And then something changed. The emails became more playful, flirty and at times positively naughty. They talked about previous sexual experiences, their fantasies, favourite toys, what they liked, what they didn't like and what they'd like to try.
Still relatively harmless until the focus changed again and they started to admit that their exchanges were turning each other on; that their masturbatory fantasies were now involving each other and it became obvious that a mutual attraction was developing between them.
They even realised that they were crossing a line and worried for each other -- Angie worrying that she might be impacting negatively on Billie's relationship with her lover and Billie worrying that she might be distracting Angie from trying to improve things at home; however they found it easy to rationalise their actions.
Billie admitted that she enjoyed flirting and had expressed a concern that she found being faithful hard but was determined to make her first 'proper' relationship work.
Angie was desperately frustrated and although she had absolutely no desire to leave her partner, she also needed someone to have fun with.
So Angie and Billie flirted and enjoyed each other's company, knowing that they were both focused on their real relationships and as they would never meet in person it couldn't do any harm.
It was a perfect solution wasn't it?
The next shift happened when the mode of communication changed. Billie suggested using instant messenger instead of email to improve the flow of conversation if they were both free at the same time.
Now the flow of reactive emails slowed down, to be replaced with interactive conversations and the naughtiness turned serious.
Even conversations that started entirely innocently ended up with them both wet, caressing their own bodies as they imagined and described in graphic detail what they would like to do to each other if they ever met in person.
Descriptions of them tribbing, with Billie riding Angie, their pussies mashing together until she could take no more. Of how Angie wanted to bury her face between Billie's legs and lick, nibble and suck her to orgasm after orgasm.
They seemed to turn each other on even without trying and oh, how they enjoyed their 'chats', their friendship deepening into something akin to love, but again they knew they had crossed a boundary, rationalising it again by explaining that as they would never meet it was fine to use each other as a safety valve to let off steam.
Surely it could only help their real relationships if their online interactions stopped them from straying elsewhere in the real world?
What possible harm could come from a little online fun?
What possible harm indeed.
It was Billie that first suggested that they should meet, just once, to get their lust for each other out of their systems and allow them to focus more fully on real life. Angie wasn't surprised when she read the message, she had expected one of them to say it sooner or later, was maybe slightly surprised that Billie had beaten her to it.
She felt her heart speed up at the mere thought of actually holding Billie in her arms and kissing her sun bronzed skin from head to toe, felt her pussy tighten in anticipation of a glorious night of lovemaking with this wonderful young woman who had made her feel so alive.
Let's face it -- the answer was always going to be 'yes', right?
Other than booking a room and arranging to meet in the hotel bar the plans had been left vague and it had been stressed that either of them could pull out at any time prior to entering the hotel room -- they both knew that if they got that far there'd be no turning back.
Angie had arrived an hour early, partly because she'd been too nervous to sit still at home and had left early and partly because the traffic had been kind, so she'd found the bar opposite the hotel where she now sat nursing her drink and wishing she'd opted for something stronger to settle her nerves.
Surprisingly, although the thought of deceiving her partner was definitely a factor, she was just as nervous about meeting Billie in person for the first and probably only time.
She thought back over what she knew about her and realised that although they had exchanged a lot of information, she still knew relatively little about her.
She knew that Billie was passionate about her job, drank alcohol very rarely, had a small appetite but that chicken was a favourite and was 26 years old with a killer body and a sparkling sense of fun.
She knew that Billie really didn't have body issues and wasn't concerned by age or stature, but she still couldn't understand why someone who was so young and gorgeous would be vaguely attracted to her 44 year old, slightly overweight and saggy body and was afraid that Billie's opinion would change if / when they finally got naked. She was also afraid that she would let Billie down somehow, not be good enough, not live up to expectations and the fear of failure and rejection started to clutch at her chest like a vice.
Suddenly it became clear how futile this was. She would go into the hotel bar across the road, meet with Billie, apologise for wasting her time but say she couldn't go through with it. Maybe Billie wouldn't even turn up? Maybe she too was having second thoughts, maybe she had decided that the risk of her partner finding out was just too great.
If she did turn up then maybe they could have a few drinks, or go for a meal and then just part ways again as friends with no harm done and no hard feelings?
Yes -- this had to be the sensible way to go.
And then she saw her and her heart stopped beating.
Billie was standing on the hotel steps opposite, staring at the door looking like she was making a decision, a holdall hanging from her right hand.
Angie glanced down at her own overnight bag by her feet and back up at Billie. She was dressed in a pair of tight black leggings that hugged her legs and arse like a second skin and a sleeveless white blouse. Angie thought she had seen the blouse before in a photo Billie had sent and knew that if it was indeed the same one, it was slightly see-through, allowing a tantalising glimpse of what it contained.
Angie's heart started to beat again as she watched Billie push the hotel door open and disappear from her view, at which point she downed her drink, grabbed her bag and headed out across the road.
'Fuck it! Nothing ventured, nothing gained!' and she marched into the hotel, turned into the bar and stopped dead in her tracks as she watched the slight young woman at the bar, with the long dark hair and beautiful brown eyes receive a drink, smiling at the barman in a way Angie had only ever seen in photos, her eyes sparkling with barely concealed mischief.
Billie caught sight of Angie in the mirror behind the bar and spun around, the smile widening and drawing Angie in like a moth to a flame.
