Janie My Next Chapter Ch 05

Janie - My Next Chapter - Ch. 5

By KAD

A/N -

I hope you are enjoying the journey Janie is on. I do appreciate your patience, thoughts, messages, and feedback. This chapter is longer than my normal but it provides a large amount of background which will fill in gaps from the beginning and previous chapters.

Also, Janie is introduced to Benjamin and does enjoy a

married couple

in this chapter, completing the connection with the beginning of the story.

I am aware that Janie being with these men isn't what is considered a Sapphic relationship but it is her journey. If this is not your interest or enjoyment, I understand but please know this backstory is the true turning point in her career and life journey.

***

I woke in the middle of the night, hearing several explosions in my mind. I slowly sat up trying not to wake her. I calmed my breathing and pulled my hair from my face. I felt Gail's hand on my back.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded then heard her voice again. I know it was my memory playing tricks on me but her sound was the calming force I needed.

"Janie, I will always be yours and yours alone, heart, mind, soul, and spirit."

The last words I would never hear from my beloved Tabitha.

I felt Gail kiss my cheek. "I am sure wherever she is, she is fine." Her hands moved to my shoulders, hugging me. "Come lay back down and relax my dear lover."

My goodness! What does she know? I closed my eyes, curling next to Gail deciding we could cross that bridge in the morning. We had time to chat while sightseeing.

***End of Chapter 4***

***

Brooke Army Medical Center, San Antonio, Texas

I woke up feeling the softness of Gail next to me. She was curled up close to me as if I was her new security blanket. In the three weeks we have been seeing each other and have been together, we have explored our relationship not just sexually but also personally.

Gail is a wonderful, sensual, and physical lover. By physical love, I mean that her body responds to the simplest touch and to the most complex touch. When she is excited, she makes it well known that she is there for the taking. Then there are the very subtle touches where she tries to let me know she wants taken.

Our personal friendship, if you want to use the title relationship, has also grown significantly. We have both realized the others' strong desire and enjoyment of the outdoors and for adventure. We have been on several day trips, hiking overnight once, a camping trip in a modest cabin with just the essentials of life's basic needs. We have enjoyed the theater, a few nights at the Improv and a few different movie genres. The horror movies we only dared in the comfort of each other's arms on one of our couches. This allowed for alone time, and plenty of pause and potty breaks.

One thing remains constant, when I am with Gail my desires, sexually, emotionally, and mentally are met. Gail has a knack of knowing just when I want to be a conversationalist and when I want to be emotional, physical, or left alone in my own little world.

I was starting to feel very comfortable with Gail. Then as typical, the Army Nurse Corps intended to have Gail's career blossom without me in her life any longer. They decided this by moving her to Landstuhl, Germany to the US Army European Medical Command.

I was professionally thrilled with her, emotionally, I was distraught.

In early September, Gail and I kissed "so long" as we didn't want to say goodbye. She winked as she walked through the TSA checkpoint and waved, mouthing the words, "Love You."

I lost sight of her in the throngs of people heading to their own destinations. That night I cried myself to sleep. It had been building for three months. I knew this day would come but here it was Gail was out of my apartment, she was out of my daily life but I had hoped down the road, I would meet her again. I mentally prepared myself this time for her moving. I didn't cry in front of her.

I let it all out that night falling asleep in a pool of tears hugging her pillow. I was on the cusp of contemplating celibacy for life. I wasn't interested in more heartbreak.

I finished the next week of my shift deciding I would take some "me" time and decided to go do something really fun. I came back from a nice long slow run, not that any of my runs are fast, but I get by. If I maintain an 8-minute mile I am happy.

I showered, dressed and headed out to the mall seeking out the bookstore. I wanted to find a new book, and then just disappear for the next two days. I actually found three good books and put my "me-cation" plan in effect. I grabbed a not-so-healthy lunch and set my GPS for Acequia Park.

The drive was filled with anticipation and excitement. As I parked near the Acequia Park stream just past the small waterfall, I relaxed listening to Mother Nature as the water flowed down her destined course.

There was a peacefulness that I enjoyed. The books I bought were sufficient enough to keep my attention. As the sun lowered on the horizon, I realized the day was almost behind me and an evening healthy meal should be on my agenda. Off I went in search of something off the beaten path.

As I was driving out of the park and my GPS directed my right turn, I took a left turn.

I reached up and pressed stop as I traveled down Mission Parkway, to State Route 122. I passed a local tavern, a few mom and pop places. My stomach made that all too familiar noise which prompted me to turn into the parking lot of an authentic looking Mexican cuisine restaurant.

I was greeted by a wonderful younger hostess who sat me at a two person table. I was treated to a delightful meal including what I considered the best salsa and queso dip I had enjoyed in a long, long time. I paid my tab bidding the waitress and hostess a good evening with my compliments. I turned and readied myself to depart the restaurant.

I heard a sweet tenor voice calling out. "Miss! Pardon me, Miss! You dropped..."

I immediately turned and saw a man waving my little zipper wallet. I lowered my head in embarrassment.

"Thank you sir, how very kind of you." I blushed as I extended my hand.

"Benjamin." He handed me my wallet. "I can't imagine being without this Miss."

"Thank you again. I do appreciate you." I smiled.

I paused briefly, contemplating a thought but allowed my defense mechanisms to take control. I turned and headed out to my car. Once safely in my car, I pondered if a simple thank you was deserved enough for that young man's assistance with my wallet. When I considered the stress and challenges I would have gone through let alone the panic I decided that he deserved a bit more than a thank you.

I walked back inside to the restaurant, finding where Benjamin still sat. He was at the table to my left. It would have been perfectly easy for him to see my wallet on the floor as I left. I straightened myself standing tall and walked over to his table. I paused and stood next to him realizing he was alone.

"Pardon me, Benjamin. May I have a seat?" He nodded. I blushed slightly.

I sat and took a deep breath. "I truly feel my thanks weren't sufficient enough for your assistance in returning my wallet." I smiled, and continued.

"The panic and stress I would have experienced which you saved me deserves at least me to pay your bill or buy you dinner."

I inhaled quickly.

"What the hell did I just say?"

I screamed in my mind.

Before I could retract my statement or at least cover it up, he smiled and let me know he accepted and he would enjoy a meal with me as payment. We chatted for a few more brief moments when I shared my phone number and explained my schedule. I left it up to him to reach out to me for the date and time confirming when we would meet.

That night after my shower, I lay in bed just dreaming of time spent with Tabitha. I was wondering about her, where she was and how she was doing. I was over thinking what transpired and had I somehow shut her out of my life? Had I somehow come on too strong and scared her off? Had she found another man questioning her sexuality?

I wondered briefly about Gail and how she was. Professionally, her career would progress quickly. That assignment should do amazing things for her. I wondered who she found to love her. Her genuine love for others would never be outdone. She was such a caring and warm lover.

The overwhelming emotions took over as tears filled my eyes and wet my cheeks. I fell asleep hugging a pillow.

***

Three days later we finished a hellishly long case. A patient who was sent from Afghanistan needed his shoulder and arm reconstructed. He was in a rollover accident. It was just tough and long. It was routine, just long and tedious.

I was due back here for my next shift in the morning and decided I just wanted dinner and some sleep. I had a few nights until I met Benjamin for dinner. A good salad and small steak for dinner sounded just perfect, off I went.

I pulled into a local place which served a great steak and salad. I contemplated sitting at a regular table but decided on a table in the bar area. Once seated I ordered a water and my salad with a few extra dinner peppers. Once delivered I ordered the ribeye medium with sherry mushrooms.

After a superb dinner, I prepared to leave when I noticed a man and a woman in the table behind me. As I walked past, I smiled and acknowledged them. She was very attractive, he was handsome. I guessed he was military just based on his haircut. She had cuteness to her, a pretty woman with gorgeous hazel eyes.

Sleep came easily that night, which was not normal for me. I woke part way through the night thinking of Tabitha, missing her.

The next morning was good, we had a relatively easy first case but I needed a cup of coffee. With an hour in between cases, I walked down to the coffee cart in the main lobby. Standing in line, I saw the woman from the restaurant the night before; she paused and gave me a wave.

Oh those hazel eyes. My breathing quickened, my chest tightened. There was something about her expression and a look in her eyes that gave me serious pause. After getting my coffee, I drifted to the side of the lobby waiting to see what she would do after getting her coffee. Sure enough once she paid, she made a beeline right towards me.

She came over and stopped next to me. I smiled a bit too much, extending my hand.

"Janie." She smiled, shaking my hand so gingerly and with a touch that lit my nerves on fire!

"I see we like the same coffee shop." She looked into my eyes. God the connection was immediate. "Connie." She paused. "That was my husband Gerald, Butch to friends, last night. He works in Neuro. I am up in the Burn Unit."

It was at that point I realized we hadn't released our hands. "I am in the OR."

"More commonalities I see." Connie said.

I just nodded like a fool looked at my watch. "Connie, I um."

She smiled, "I'll find you, and we should have dinner this week."

I blushed deeply. "I would love that Connie."

She smiled then inquired with a twinkle in her eye, "Which dinner or that I will find you?"

"Both actually Connie," I paused. "Both Connie. I winked, turned and walked towards the elevators back to the OR.

***

Two days later, I was sitting in front of my locker inside the nurse's lounge. I had finished my shower and was drying off getting ready to head home. I heard the door open and someone called my name.

"Janie? Janie? It's Connie."

I quivered a little inside; I knew she would find me." Hey! Just a second finishing up here."

I pulled my top on, pulled up my panties and slacks then slipped into my sandals. Connie turned the corner as I was putting my hair up in a low ponytail. I turned to look at her and paused.

"You found me!" I said smiling.

"Don't act so surprised, I just had to figure out which OR team you worked with."

I threw my toiletries and crocs back into my locker then closed and locked it. Picking up my dirty clothes, I stuffed them into my backpack and nodded as if I was ready to leave. Connie turned and walked from the lounge. I was so drawn to her I just followed her not asking where we were going.

I followed her to the back parking lot. Once we were a good distance from the doors, she turned and looked at me.

"Do you feel it? Or am I just way off in what I read in your eyes Janie?" She asked, taking another small step closer.

"Careful for those watchful eyes which are always around." I hesitated.

A wide smile came across Connie's face. Her eyes gleamed as she bit her bottom lip then ran her tongue across her lower lip, as of tracing her teeth. I could see her blush.

"Hearing you say that means you want this as much as I do."

"I am interested and yes it's been a while since I've had time with a beautiful woman." I admitted.

"Would you be interested in a glass of wine or two in the conversation in a more private place?" She smiled.

"I thought you would never ask. I have the perfect private place in mind if you would like to follow me."

She invited me, and I quickly accepted.

Thirty minutes later, we were pulling into a beautiful subdivision, not too far from the hospital off the main road. My thought initially was that it was a nice house and a nice neighborhood. I hoped this wasn't a friendship and sexual playmate where the relationship was doomed from the beginning.

As I settled into the plush seating of Connie's living room, I couldn't help but admire the stunning view of the deck and the sparkling ground pool beyond. The modern design of the house exuded elegance and sophistication, making me feel both comfortable and intrigued. Connie and Gerald's attention to detail was apparent in every corner of their home.

Moments later, Connie returned with two wine glasses and a bottle of red wine, an enticing choice for our evening together. She gracefully placed the glasses on a sleek coffee table and uncorked the bottle with a gentle pop. The aroma of the wine filled the air, as she filled the decanter enhancing the ambiance of the room.

We chatted for a few moments as the wine was given a chance to breathe. Connie then poured the wine with precision, ensuring each glass was filled to perfection. As she handed me a glass, I couldn't help but notice her warm smile and the genuine hospitality she exuded. It was evident that she took great pride in making me feel welcome and comfortable.

"Cheers."

Connie said, raising her glass in a toast. I reciprocated, clinking my glass against hers, appreciating the moment and the company. The rich flavor of the wine danced on my palate, and as we sipped and engaged in a chat slowly getting to know each other.

"I must ask Connie." I took a sip ensuring I knew what I was going to ask. "Gerald, your husband, does approve." I stuttered. "Doesn't he?"

Her hand slowly eased up my arm and then gently down caressing my skin.

"Oh dear Janie, he does with the utmost certainty." She leaned over kissing my neck. "He is looking forward to watching us and then playing if you are interested."

I immediately turned towards facing her softly and nipped at my lower lip, my left arm now over her shoulder, my hand almost involuntarily, pulling her body closer to mine as our lips connected for the first time.

The first soft, subtle kiss with Connie moved me. It made me realize how I longed for and missed this touch, this feeling. I pressed my lips firmer against hers, parting them open becoming the aggressor.

Her moans ensured I was moving her body, her desires and wants being met. I felt her hands softly move on my arms, a gentle caress. As our kisses grew to wet, meaningful and passion filled kisses I knew what I had wanted. I wanted her taste. I wanted her to feel me. I wanted to fuck this woman.

I broke the kiss and slowly gazed into her eyes. A perfect romantic mood, our noses brushed each other, we were still close together. I could feel her breath on my skin. My need was still great but I needed to ensure I was not pressing too hard.

"That accelerated quickly." I released her from the hug. My hands trailed down Connie's arms holding her hands.

She spoke up. "Your touch, your feel, it's magical. You know just what I want, how to make me feel."

I kissed her lips. "We have plenty of time Connie, if you do not mind; I would like to slow down a bit. I just want to ensure this is right for you, for me and for us."

Connie smiled, leaned forward, and took hold of both glasses of wine, handing mine to me and took a sip of hers.

She curled closer to me, snuggling with me, her head resting on my chest just above my breast. My left arm curled wrapping Connie into me holding her close enjoying the lavender aroma of her shampoo.

As we sipped our wine, Connie admitted to me that she had loved the comfort and love of a woman now and then but needed the touch and love of a man. I shared I was almost the opposite.

I love the comfort of a woman, how I feel around her and how she makes me feel sexually, emotionally, and physically. I feel at ease and calm when with the right woman. I explained I wasn't totally against the love of a man, but didn't

need

one. I shared with her my secret desires but never spoke of my lover's past.

The reality of the situation and what she just said hit me hard. Her words echoed in my mind. She has a husband; she likes a woman but needs a man. This was a dangerous relationship.

"What the hell am I doing?"

I thought to myself.

"Connie, our connectivity is strong. My desire to continue and to take you to bed right now is great but I feel that this was a great first date." I hesitated looking for the perfect words to find my escape. "I truly enjoyed getting to know you better."

I took a last sip of wine cleaning my head. I placed my empty glass on the table and turned to her.

"I must think things through and ensure this is right for us. You are married, you have a husband and I will never want to come between that love. I will not be the reason."

I felt the tears welling in my eyes. Why?

Her kiss, her touch, how she cuddled with me, it was just so special. I then saw the surprise and disappointment in Connie's eyes.

"I want to take a day or two." I leaned forward kissing her cheek. I whispered in her ear, "Don't worry, I know where to find you."

As I drove away and was heading home, I felt a pang of regret but I knew I wasn't the type of woman to ruin a good relationship. I had never done it in the past and wasn't going to start now.

***

On Thursday morning, as normal, I was up early and heading to the hospital. I pulled into the parking lot and was making my way across the parking lot when my phone rang. I pulled it from my bag and saw it was Benjamin. I let it go to voicemail. I would call him back later.

I purposefully avoided the coffee cart in the main lobby; I just wasn't sure where I wanted things to progress to. Sexually I was excited and wanted to be with Connie, mentally, not so much. Driving home that day I called Benjamin. We made plans for Sunday afternoon.

We had a nice lunch on Sunday and we actually went for a stroll in the RiverWalk. I learned that Benjamin was a young engineering professional, and I mean

young

. He was just one year out of college and was just turning 24 in a few weeks.

Our conversation flowed with ease and he let me talk about anything. He let me lead the conversation and after forty minutes we found ourselves turning around and heading back to our cars. I had this feeling in my stomach, one not felt in a long time. One I hadn't felt for a man in many years. It wasn't sexual; yet. It was a feeling of comfort and interest.