If I Never Knew Your Name

This is Part 1 of a three-part story. Each part will have a unique title. Part 2 is titled "And the Grass Won't Pay No Mind."

You should at least have read 'Your Silver Nights and Golden Days Pts. 01 - 02' to get the back story on the characters in this story. Reading 'Saving Grace' and 'The Gift' wouldn't hurt either.

The following events took place in the mid-1980s, long before the "Don't ask, don't tell" policy was implemented in the military. To be an active lesbian was risking your career, even more so if you are an officer.

© 2021 Candy_Kane54

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October 1985

It was another beautiful Saturday morning. We were all getting together at the Manhattan Beach pier as we have for the past several weeks. As I had each time before, I could barely sleep thinking about being with Virginia again today. I was smiling and singing Whitney Houston's 'Saving All My Love for You' as I danced around, fixing breakfast for the boys. I was just so happy for everything happening in my life recently since I've started dating Virginia.

Once I had breakfast plated, I went in and woke up the boys. Matthew, as usual, had his covers kicked off and was sprawled across his lower bunk. Mark was in the top bunk, and he was burrowed under his covers like he was afraid of freezing to death. I shook them both awake and said, "Breakfast is ready."

Matthew immediately jumped up and, after giving me a quick hug and saying, "Love you, Mom," headed out to the kitchen.

Mark slowly woke up and smiled when he opened his eyes. He quickly scrambled out from under his covers and wrapped his arms around my neck, and said, "Love you, Mom."

I took Mark in my arms and lowered him to the floor, and said, "Go get your breakfast before Matthew eats it for you."

Mark hurried out, and I quickly made their beds before I headed back out to the kitchen. When I got there, the boys were in a boisterous conversation about what they would be doing today with 'Aunt Ginny.' I was thrilled the boys had accepted Virginia so readily, and they were comfortable calling her Aunt Ginny.

I had talked with Virginia about how the boys could address her so they wouldn't out us inadvertently to Mom or to their friends at school. I told Virginia our closeness could be seen as our being cousins and not our having a relationship if the boys called her their aunt. Virginia agreed with my thoughts. When I told the boys to start calling her Aunt Virginia, they quickly accepted it and immediately shortened it to Aunt Ginny.

The first time they greeted her as Aunt Ginny, Virginia smiled widely. She hugged both of them, telling them how happy she was with them for accepting her into their family. The first time they called her Aunt Ginny in front of Mom, I noticed Mom looking intently at Virginia and me for a moment. I held my breath, hoping she wouldn't ask about it. I was relieved when she didn't say anything, but I noticed she watched our interactions much closer after that.

I sat down with the boys and started eating my breakfast. As I half-listened to the boys, my mind wandered back to that first Saturday I introduced the boys to Virginia ...

September 1985

I was smiling so hard my cheeks ached. I was so excited about today I had barely slept last night. The boys were also excited about today; Matthew more than Mark since they were looking forward to meeting Virginia. I confess I had talked so much about Virginia for the past few weeks I was surprised they hadn't told me to stop yet.

I finished making breakfast -- pancakes, bacon, and scrambled eggs; and plated up the food before going into the bedroom to get the boys up. Matthew was in the lower bunk and had kicked his blanket off. He had just turned nine last month. His tousled blond hair was nearly bleached white from all of the time he's spent in the sun this summer. I bent down and shook his shoulder, and he instantly woke up, his eyes snapping open. His blue eyes sucked me in, and I thought about how much he looked like his father. I smiled and said, "Time for breakfast."

I then stood up, and l reached up and shook Mark's shoulder to wake him up. He was seven and still slept like a baby. His tousled brown hair was practically his trademark. I was always chasing him down to comb it. When he opened his eyes, he smiled at me like he always does when I wake him up. His brown eyes made him look so handsome, and I smiled back at him as I said, "Time for breakfast."

They both scrambled out of bed and headed out into the kitchen. I quickly made the boys' beds before I went out to join them. They had already devoured half of their breakfast, talking about what was going to happen today. I sat down and started eating, even though I didn't have much of an appetite.

Once the boys finished breakfast, I told them to go wash up and get dressed. I cleaned up the kitchen and quickly washed the dishes before going to the bathroom to get myself ready. I had bought myself some nice clothes from Good Will to wear for my date today using the tip money I had received from Virginia. I donned the outfit I had laid out, a pair of white Capri's and a white tank top with blue trimming. I had also bought clothes for the boys to wear. I wanted them to look good for Virginia.

After inspecting the boys and making sure they looked nice, we got ready to go. We got in my beat-up old Ford Fairlane, and I prayed it would start when I turned the key. When it started, I felt relief, and I pulled out, heading down to the Manhattan Beach pier. The boys were busy talking about who would be the first to see Virginia and what they planned to do while on the pier. I listened with half an ear and just felt so happy they were enthusiastic about this. While I had been worried about whether Virginia would like the boys, I never really thought about the boys not getting along with Virginia. Since they were so looking forward to this adventure, I didn't feel I needed to worry about that right now.

Even though it was early Saturday morning, the traffic was bumper to bumper as everyone apparently had somewhere to be this morning. It was a beautiful morning, nonetheless, 72 degrees and sunny, and I loved it. I was in a good mood despite the traffic, and I was glad we had left as early as I had so we wouldn't be late.

I turned onto Manhattan Beach Boulevard from Aviation Boulevard and knew I'd be at the pier in a few minutes. 'Money for Nothing' by Dire Straits was on the radio, and I sang to it as we got closer to the beach. I passed Jack's and made it down to the parking lot, hoping there was still a spot open to park in. Luckily, I found one, and I spied Virginia getting out of her car just as I pulled in.

My breath caught as I saw her, and I was thrilled she was serious about meeting the boys and hadn't backed out. I know I shouldn't have had any doubts, but so far, our relationship has been too good to be true, and I was always afraid something would mess it up. If Virginia and the boys didn't hit it off, that was a deal-breaker, and, as much as I liked Virginia, I'd have to end it with her.

As I turned off the ignition and prepared to get out of the car, Virginia walked up and started feeding the meter. I saw she was wearing an outfit similar to mine, her top trimmed in green instead of blue. I popped the trunk and got out of the car, going back and getting my overnight bag out. When Virginia finished with the meter, she came around to the trunk, and I handed her my bag. She went off to put it in the trunk of her car while I got the boys out of mine.

The boys started running around in excitement, picking up on my excitement. As Virginia approached us, and before they got too boisterous, I said, "Boys, settle down. I want you to say hello to Virginia."

Matthew, being more outgoing, spoke up first and said, "Hi, Virginia!"

Mark, being the shy one of the two, then said, "Hello, Virginia."

I held my breath, wondering how Virginia would respond to their greetings. I was thrilled when Virginia smiled and held her hand out to Matthew and said, "Hi, I'm Virginia. You must be Matthew."

Matthew took her hand and shook it before he looked over to Mark and said, "Yes, and that's my brother Mark."

I loved that Matthew was looking out for his little brother and directed Virginia's attention to him. I thrilled again when Virginia held out her hand and said, "Hello, Mark, I'm Virginia."

Mark shyly took her hand and shook it before he came over to me and side hugged me. He looked up at me with a smile on his face and whispered, "Mom, she's beautiful."

I ruffled his hair and whispered back, "Yes, she is, isn't she." I turned and smiled at Virginia, and she smiled back at me. So far, the introductions have gone good. The boys seem to be accepting Virginia.

Virginia looked at Mark, held out her hand, and asked, "Well, shall we head over to the pier?"

My heart thrilled again when the boys both said, "Yes!" They each grabbed one of Virginia's hands and headed toward the pier, nearly dragging Virginia with them. The sight of them being so enthusiastic about being with Virginia made me laugh.

Matthew looked back at me, a broad smile on his face, and said, "Come on, Mom!"

I hurried to catch up, my heart singing with happiness. So far, everything has gone great. Virginia seemed fine with the boys, and they appeared to be okay with her. I was really looking forward to the rest of the day.

October 1985

The boys practically inhaled their breakfast, eating it so fast they were already done while I still had food on my plate. I told them to go wash up and get dressed while I finished my breakfast. As I listened to their boisterous chatter, I ate my breakfast, planning out our day. Virginia really enjoyed taking the boys on the Manhattan Beach pier, so we would start there. After that, we would probably go take in a movie. The matinee featured "Back to the Future" today, and I think the boys would enjoy seeing it.

I quickly finished my breakfast and went to get dressed. Today I was going to wear a soft yellow spaghetti-strap tank top and a matching mid-thigh skort. I had found my outfit at the St. Vincent de Paul Society store in Gardena. I liked shopping there because the people were really nice and non-judgmental. I checked myself in the mirror and liked what I saw. I was sure Virginia would like it too. I then popped into the boy's bedroom to check on their progress. They had both gotten dressed, so I spent a minute adjusting their clothes to get them right. As usual, Mark's hair was mussed, so I had to take him to the bathroom and comb his hair.

Finally, we were ready to go. I took one last look around our tiny apartment before leaving, wondering what Virginia would think if she saw my place. It was just a one-bedroom efficiency apartment, but it was all I could afford at the time. Since I started working at Jack's, though, I hadn't had to worry as much about being able to afford it and feed the boys. I made great tips there, and I was so glad I was lucky enough to stumble into that job ...

April 1985

It was almost closing time on Friday night. I didn't usually work the closing shift at The Corner Bar because I couldn't get Mom to watch the boys for me all of the time. However, tonight, Mom wasn't busy, so I could volunteer to work the late shift. Although I hated working until 2:30 AM, I did get better tips because the men were a little more generous when they were into their cups. As much as I hated to do it, I took advantage of that. I made sure as many buttons on my blouse were undone as possible to give a show without anything falling out. I'd make sure to stand a little further back and lean in when serving them so they could get a good look. Mark's birthday was coming up soon, and I wanted to get something nice for him.

I could tell it was working when I never made eye contact because their eyes were elsewhere. Of course, I had to endure their clumsy and risqué attempts at being gallant and propositioning me, not even bothering to hide their wedding rings. I would just smile and laugh, gently rebuffing their moves in a way that didn't turn them off. If they put their hand on my ass, I would just smile and move enough to remove it after giving them a couple of seconds of fun. If they got grabby and aggressive, I would immediately move away, and they wouldn't get a smile.

In between serving my tables, I would pop behind the bar to get my orders. Michelle, one of the other waitresses, was there and looked me over and said, "You're really slutting it up tonight."

I liked Michelle, despite her harsh language. While she was a lovely person, she had a face that would make Mike Myers offer her his hockey mask. However, she was well-endowed and wasn't afraid to display her assets to get tips. I just smiled at her and said, "It helps feed my boys."

Michelle nudged me with her elbow, winked, and asked, "So the girls are still feeding the boys?"

I had to laugh at that as I picked up my tray and headed back out. As I served one of my tables, I overheard two guys talking about a new restaurant in Manhattan Beach. It had opened two months ago and was named "Jack's Salad Bar and Grill." Managing to avoid the obnoxious groping, I couldn't help but pay attention since the play on words with the restaurant's name intrigued me. My ears perked up when I heard them discussing how business was so good they would be hiring a few more workers. I decided right then to get down there in the morning and apply for a job.

By the time I left to go home, I was tired but determined to follow up with my plan to visit "Jack's" in the morning and apply for a position. I counted out my tips and was pleased with how much I had collected tonight. The boys would have enough to eat, after all. As I drove home, I figured a family-oriented restaurant in an upscale location might have a better clientele. That meant I wouldn't need to avoid groping hands all of the time.

When I got home, I stripped and showered before putting on panties and a sleeping tee and going to sleep on the couch. I set the alarm for 7 AM because I wanted to have time to clean up and dress up. I needed to put my best foot forward when I went down to Jack's to apply for a job.

When the alarm went off, I groaned but got up and performed my toilet. I wore my best outfit that was modest but didn't hide my toned and tanned body. I called Mom to let her know what I was doing. She was thrilled to hear I was trying to get a better job, so Mom told me she'd be happy to keep the boys a little longer.

I headed out, making my way down to Manhattan Beach Boulevard. I turned west and followed it down, unsure where the restaurant was but determined to find it, hoping it would be open on a Saturday. Eventually, I found it and saw it was only two blocks from the beach. I found a parking spot, checked myself in the rearview mirror, and got out of the car. I told myself I was good enough to work here and to be assertive without being pushy. I needed to sell myself as a hard worker who was competent and dependable.

I walked up to the door and was relieved to see the Help Wanted sign in the window. I went in and stepped up to the hostess desk. When the hostess came up to greet me, I smiled my brightest smile and said, "Hello. I'm Bonnie, and I'm here to apply for a job."

The hostess took a moment to appraise my appearance before she smiled and said, "Hello, Bonnie. I'm Christy. Let's head back to the office, and I'll get you an application."

I heaved a sigh of relief. I've passed the first test, apparently. As I followed Christy back to the office, she asked me about my work experience. I rattled off several places where I'd worked and what I did until we got to the office. I managed to slip into the conversation about how I had two young boys and was raising them on my own. I don't know if that was what won her over, but by the time she pulled out the application and handed it to me, she smiled and said, "I need you to fill this out, but it's just a formality. You're hired."

I couldn't believe my luck, so I smiled and said, "Thank you, Christy. I really appreciate it. When do you want me to start?"

"We'll start you on Monday," Christy said, appreciating my enthusiasm. "Let me see if I can find a top for you. What size are you?"

I told Christy my size, and while she went off to get a top for me, I quickly filled out the application. When Christy came back, she had two tops with her, which were tees with breast pockets with Jack's logo on the back. I noticed Christy was wearing high waist shorties, so when she handed the tops to me, I asked, "Do we wear shorts with these?"

Christy smiled and said, "Yes, like what I'm wearing. No hip-huggers or cut-offs, please."

I handed the filled-out application to her, smiled, and said, "I'm looking forward to working here. Do you have a menu I can take with me to study?"

Christy, again, smiled at my enthusiasm and said, "Sure. Come with me."

I followed her out, and she took me to the workstation next to the kitchen. Christy handed me a carry-out menu before taking me back to the kitchen. She called out, "Manny, I'd like you to meet our new hire."

Christy turned to me and said, "Manny is our chef, and he runs the kitchen. If you have any questions about the menu, he's the one to talk to."

Just then, Manny came out from the cooler and smiled when he saw me. Manny was tall and thin, with a trim goatee, and his long black hair was coiled up in a hairnet. He walked up to me, stuck his hand out, and said, "Hi! I'm Manuel Ortega, but everyone calls me Manny."

I was pleased with his friendliness, so I smiled, shook his hand, and said, "Manny, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Bonnie, and I'm looking forward to working with you."

Manny ran his eyes up and down my body before he said, "No, the pleasure is mine." He then turned to Christy and said, "I've got some deliveries scheduled for today from some new suppliers. Just send them around to the back door if they come in your way?"

"Sure, Manny," Christy said before leading me back out of the kitchen. As we walked back out to the lobby, Christy said, "Don't mind, Manny. He talks a good game, but he's gay. I hope that won't be a problem with you?"

"No, not a bit," I said. "I have a gay friend, and he's one of the nicest guys I know."

Christy smiled again, and I knew I had passed her last test. As we got to her hostess desk, she said, "I'll see you Monday. Be here at 10 AM so we can introduce you to everyone and show you how we run things here."

I smiled back and said, "I'm looking forward to it." I left and practically skipped back to my car. I was thrilled I had managed to stumble into this great opportunity. I drove over to Mom's place to pick up the boys and tell her the good news.

October 1985

I got the boys in the car, and after making sure they were buckled in, I took off to head down to the Manhattan Beach pier. As usual, the weather was beautiful; it was 72 degrees and sunny, just the way I liked it. The streets were packed with everyone heading out to do whatever they did on weekends. I'm sure a lot of them were heading down to the beach, so I hoped I'd be able to find a parking spot. The news on the radio mentioned there would be a professional beach volleyball tournament this weekend next to the pier. "Oh, great," I thought. "No wonder the traffic is so bad."

As I fought the traffic, I got onto Manhattan Beach Boulevard and headed down to the beach. As we passed Jack's, crawling along with the bumper-to-bumper traffic, Matthew said, "Look, Mark. That's where Mom works."

Then Mark asked, "What's it say on the window?"

Matthew replied, "It say's 'Jack's Salad Bar and Grill.'"

"Oh, wow," Mark exclaimed. He then asked me, "Mom, is there a salad bar in there?"