Hook Me Up Ladies In Love Pt 01

Hook Me Up

A Ladies In Love Romance

By Magda McKune

Part One

Chapter 1

"So, what is it that you do?" the man asked across the small round table.

Lucy Lanes returned a slight smile. She knew her date would get around to asking the employment question eventually, but she didn't expect it first thing out of the gate. "I own an auto mechanic shop."

She watched the man's face for his reaction. There it was -- amusement? Curiosity? Surprise? Skepticism?

Perhaps deception was a typical phenomenon in blind dates, Lucy mused. Folks tend to want to puff themselves up to strangers, making them feel more important and more successful than they really were. Lucy expected as much. People want to make a good impression on others. Particularly single men meeting beautiful young women for the first time.

Lucy had to admit the revealing of her profession seemed to be a tad bizarre. A lady auto mechanic was not a common occupation. And yet, if she was going to make something up as a lie to a complete stranger, why not choose an occupation such as a fashion magazine editor, real estate agent, or advertising consultant?

"I run a garage," didn't sound particularly glamorous, but it was the truth.

Lucy always assumed that because of her flawless complexion and voluptuous hourglass figure, men would instantly label her as fashion model. Or at the very least, an office secretary or receptionist. Nothing of any substance, merely a pretty face and fine body to look at. No matter. Lucy had grown used to it. Though she had always been a tomboy at heart, Lucy Lanes was blessed with a fabulous supermodel figure and a gorgeous face.

Lucy Lanes was in her mid-twenties, five feet two inches tall with naturally curly blood-red hair that hung two inches below her shoulders. Her eyes were deep and dark and her lips were full and red. By the time Lucy had reached puberty, she realized her features could get her whatever she wanted from the male gender. Boys offered to carry her books in school and tried to sit next to her in class and in the cafeteria. Lucy never encouraged any of their amorous advances. Her father warned Lucy early on that boys will say and do practically anything in order to be seen with a pretty girl. When Lucy's chest expanded, she quickly discovered that the boys were being nice to her just to get a feel of her boobs. She found their fascination with her anatomy repetitive and boring.

Lucy grew distant and aloof, focusing her attention toward repairing old cars at her father's auto shop than encouraging boys. She discovered she could have much more fun hanging out with her best friend Suzie "Sparky" Commons in a greasy dirty garage than going out on dinner dates or to the movies with amorous young men.

But now Lucy was over a quarter century old and she began feeling that she had missed out on a good portion of the dating scene. She longed to find another person to share her life with, and not be tempted to wholly immerse herself in the family auto shop business. The hard part was finding someone who was interested in the inner Lucy, the person beyond the gorgeous face and perfect body. She wanted a relationship that was lasting and real, not fleeting and superficial.

Being beautiful wasn't always a blessing. Whenever a man expresses interest in a pretty gal, she has to wonder about his intentions. Is he simply regarding her as a one-night stand? A quick lay? Does he want to show her off to his friends as some kind of arm-candy trophy? Could he ever be interested in her for more than just her body?

Lucy's temporary date across the table gave a wide toothy grin and spread his arms in acceptance. "Well darlin', that's just fine and dandy!" he drawled in a deep Southern accent. This fellow was right out of an episode of Bonanza, complete with white cowboy hat, bolo tie and brown leather vest. Lucy thought the man was rather sweet in a bucolic sort of way. However, she doubted she could ever be interested in entering into a long-term relationship with Mister Fine and Dandy. There was just so much Good Old Boy country cuteness a girl could handle before she hung herself.

Lucy smiled sweetly at her temporary assignation. She shouldn't be too hard on the man. At least he was genuinely interested in her. The last speed date partner she was with had spent the entire time talking about trends in the real estate market. Now is the perfect time to buy or sell! Lucy suspected the fellow was less interested in finding a lifelong companion than in networking for potential business prospects.

"So what is it that you do for a living?" Lucy politely asked the cowboy. She was fairly certain this man was not going to be her dream companion, so she wanted to move the conversation quickly along until the bell rang, signaling their short date was finally and mercifully over.

"I'm into cattle," the man proudly announced with a wide toothy grin.

Lucy forced a smile. "I would never have guessed."

"That's right, little darlin'," the cowboy beamed. "Two thousand head of the finest angus beef you ever set your pretty little eyes on."

Lucy expelled a quiet grunt. The only angus beef she ever laid eyes on was in the refrigerated meat aisle of the local grocery store. Either that, or the fast-food takeout lane of a nearby burger joint.

"Things are just fine and dandy," he nodded happily. "Now all I need is a pretty little filly to share my homestead with."

"Good for you." Lucy genuinely hoped the man would find his dream date, and find her soon. That way she wouldn't risk meeting up with Mister Fine and Dandy ever again.

Lucy glanced around the meeting room situated in the back of the Italian restaurant and at the more than twenty other participants in the speed dating experience. The room was large and spacious, typically used for banquets or meetings of the local Kiwanis Club. It was a pleasant enough environment for meeting a stranger for the first time. God knows Lucy met up with a few bland dates in worse places than this.

Lucy began to question the logic of her getting into this whole speed dating fiasco in the first place. She imagined it would be a tad more reliable than some dispassionate online dating service. Lucy had heard horror stories of how guys would post personal photos that didn't resemble them at all. Or how married men would use it to find unsuspecting women to cheat on their wives. At least in this way, Lucy could meet the candidate face to face before agreeing to go out on a real date with him.

The woman conducting the speed dating event rang a little bell and announced, "Times' up!"

The cowboy rose to stand. "It was a real pleasure meeting you, little lady!" he drawled.

Lucy returned a sugary smile and said, "Just fine and dandy!"

Her date left his seat and another fellow took his place. This was a young man in his late twenties or early thirties, nicely dressed in a dark blue coat and maroon tie. His crystal blue eyes were set in a handsome face and he had neatly-styled short blonde hair. Lucy immediately liked what she saw.

"How do you do," the man said, reaching across the table and offering his hand to shake. "I'm Bill Burton."

Lucy smiled brightly and accepted his hand. "Lucy Lanes."

The fellow stared deeply into Lucy's eyes, as if he was studying them. "Pardon me for asking," he said with just a hint of humor in his voice, "but what's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, to say that you're stunningly beautiful would be a gross understatement. Seems to me a pretty woman like you should have no trouble finding a date."

Bill's eyes never left hers. Lucy liked that. She appreciated a man who noticed her face before her bust size. "A friend suggested this speed dating thing to me," she lied. It was entirely her idea, but she didn't want to tell the man that she was just like every other gal in the city who was looking for the right man in her life and often resorted to unorthodox means to meet them. "The truth is; I'm hoping to find someone who is searching for a lasting relationship the same as I am. I want someone who would be around for the long haul."

Bill tilted his head slightly and regarded her curiously. "Did you recently break up with someone?"

"No. Why?"

"That tinge of desperation in your voice suggests a recent void in your life that you are trying to fill. The end of a long relationship, perhaps?"

Lucy furrowed her brow with a perplexed expression on her face. "Are you some kind of therapist?"

"No," he smiled. "Merely making an assumption based on certain observations."

Lucy paused and thought a moment. "Maybe so. My dad passed away a few months ago. He and I were very close. I miss having a man in my life. Maybe that's why I'm looking."

Bill leaned back in his seat and chuckled with amusement. "Looking for a father figure, you mean?"

Lucy laughed. "Not necessarily. A regular man will do just fine."

Bill casually shrugged a shoulder. "As for a long-term relationship, that scene is not for me."

"Oh? Why not?"

"I prefer to take it day by day without any expectations. Things rarely go as you plan anyway. You start off with a short-term fling and it turns out to be a lifelong romance. Or you set your heart on something permanent and lasting and it ends much sooner than you expected. I say; go into a relationship without any expectations and see where it leads. It may save you a lot of disappointment and grief, or it may lead to something surprising and wonderful."

Lucy smiled and shook her head amazement. "Now it's my turn to ask; what's a nice guy like you doing in a place like this?"

"What do you mean?"

"I would think a man who is not looking for any type of serious relationship with a woman could find plenty of dates. A good-looking guy like you ought to have a bevy of ladies to choose from."

Bill grimaced slightly. "Not exactly. A lot of gals are turned off by my cavalier attitude. They see me as being superficial and shallow. Just because I'm not ready and willing to settle down with someone, doesn't mean I'm not open to the possibility sometime down the road. When the time is right for me to have a monogamous relationship, I'll know it. Until then, I just want to have some fun while I'm still young."

Lucy smiled and patted his hand atop the table. "I'm sure the right woman for you is out there somewhere," she said. "But that woman isn't me."

The man shrugged nonchalantly, the smile returning to his face. "Ah well," he sighed ruefully. "Your loss."

The bell rang again and all the guys shifted to their next table. The next man to sit across from Lucy instantly made her skin crawl. He had a creepy, scary presence about him, like the psycho stalker in a slasher horror movie. The guy was exceedingly thin with a bony face and a pale complexion from spending too much time indoors under artificial lighting. His short dark hair was slicked back with some kind of hair gel, and he had a disquieting gleam in his beady little eyes. "You certainly are a beautiful lady," he grinned with a toothy smile. "I've been waiting all evening to talk with you."

Lucy swallowed audibly and forced a smile. "Lucky me."

"I'm Norman Lutz." He removed one hand from his lap from under the table and a shiver instantly raced up Lucy's spine. For a moment she expected a machete to materialize in his fist. He offered his hand to shake and she timidly took it. His palm seemed normal, not clammy or sweaty.

"I'm Lucy -- " She stopped and held her breath. Lucy hesitated giving out her real name. This guy may not be a crazed stalker, but it might be prudent not to tempt fate. "I'm, uh... Lucinda. Lucinda Barnes."

"Pleased to meet you."

"Likewise," she nodded with a timid forced smile. "So, Norman, what do you do?"

"I'm a taxidermist."

That explains it, she thought. Mister Creepy surrounds himself with dead things all day. "How fascinating."

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"What do you do for a living?"

Lucy shrugged casually. "Oh, a little of this and a little of that."

"I'll bet you're a fashion model," he stated sincerely. "A woman with a face like yours should be on the cover of magazines."

Lucy began to warm to the fellow. Perhaps he wasn't such a bad guy after all.

"Fashion magazines, I mean," Norman continued. "Not those trashy tabloid rags where they expose murdering housewives, or seedy biker mags with chicks in bikinis stretched across the hoods of muscle cars, or smut like Penthouse or anything. I mean classy magazines like Cosmopolitan and such." He offered her another toothy grin. "Not that your body wouldn't look great in a tight skimpy revealing dress."

Lucy forced a smile. And the creepy guy was back. "You flatter me," she said. "So... do you go on many dates, Norman?"

"Not a lot," he sighed sadly. "A lot of chicks think taxidermy is a turn off."

"I would imagine so," she nodded soberly. "Perhaps it might be a good idea to not lead off with that little tidbit of information."

"You may be right."

"Maybe you can tell them about some of your other interests." Lucy eyed him intently. Besides stalking and murdering coeds in dark alleys, she mused.

Norman was thoughtful for a moment. "I like bowling. Reading mystery novels. Small engine repair -- "

Lucy's ears perked up. "Small engine repair?"

"Yeah. I tear apart and rebuild lawnmowers and motorcycles and things like that. I like working with my hands, seeing how things work and putting them back together. Kind of like taxiderm -- " Norman paused and winced sheepishly. "Sorry. I didn't mean to bring that subject up again."

"It's all right," Lucy smiled. She was beginning to warm to the man once again. The guy was simply lonely and shy. Probably didn't have a lot of social skills, which explained the unusual profession. And the need to consult a dating service. Lucy smiled to herself. At least the man wasn't an undertaker. Handling dead animals was one thing. Working with human corpses was another matter entirely. "Those sound like very nice hobbies," she stated honestly. "However, might I suggest you start off by telling women what you like to do and maybe find some common interests you may share."

The man nodded thoughtfully. "Good idea." He looked at her evenly. "Would you like to go out with me sometime?"

Lucy's mind pictured him opening the door to his home and inviting her inside. The walls would be adorned with a variety of dead animals and heads of various beasts, their unseeing eyes staring at her from all directions. Norman Lutz may indeed be a decent fellow after all, but she couldn't imagine living in that kind of environment. "Probably not," she said as nicely as possible. "But thank you for asking."

It was nearly eleven o'clock when Lucy entered her modest two-bedroom house and set her keys on the table beside the door. The place used to belong to her father, but after he passed away six months ago, the house and everything else the man possessed was left to her. Though she was tempted to remain in her tiny one-bedroom apartment after he died, Lucy chose to move into his house rather than sell the place.

At first it felt weird walking into her father's house and not finding him there. Lucy found solace in seeing all the old familiar furniture and décor about her. Plus she preferred the comforting illusion of coming back home rather than living in a cold, unfeeling, empty apartment.

Lucy sat in the high wingback chair and kicked off her shoes. She pondered about participating in that strange experience of speed dating in the back room of the restaurant. It was crazy, she knew, but at least it put a face and a warm body to a person before you agreed to go out with them on a real date. It was about a half step above online dating. Communicating with a complete stranger through the internet was still a gamble, no matter what they say. People sometimes post pictures of themselves that don't look anything like the real person. Of course you can exchange information beforehand, but that doesn't alleviate the apprehension and anxiety that goes with meeting somebody for the first time, or the worry of being judged as potential dating material by a complete stranger.

Obtaining vital information about a person's past, their likes and dislikes, their ambitions and desires through the internet is a good starting point, but how can you really know if there is chemistry between the two of you unless you meet face to face? Your compatibility potential may look great on paper, but what if the man has a really annoying laugh? Or has zero table manners and social skills? What if he has a ghastly wart on his chin with a three-inch hair growing out of it? Blech!

Lucy drew in and expelled a long, dejected sigh. She supposed it all boiled down to not wanting to be lonely anymore. Things were fine when her father was alive. Her mom died from cancer when Lucy was in high school and it had been just the two of them ever since. Of course, there was always her friend Sparky at the garage. Suzie Commons was her best friend and everybody who knew her called her Sparky. Lucy had a faint recollection that it was her father who gave Suzie that nickname. Something to do with spark plugs, maybe. Lucy couldn't remember. She'd try to remember to ask Sparks about it someday.

It was late and Lucy didn't feel like watching TV or having anything to drink. She figured she's just head off to bed and read until she fell asleep.

Lucy picked up her shoes and headed for the bedroom. She concluded that the speed dating scenario, submitting personal internet profiles, and going on blind dates was indeed a pain, but ultimately worth it in the end. All she wanted was to have someone else to share her life. Even at the age of 26, she felt she was getting too old to feel so alone.

Lucy entered her bedroom and tossed her shoes in the corner. She paused in front of the full-length mirror and checked out her body. She had a mighty nice figure for a gal her age. Lucy turned and struck a sideways pose with one hand on her waist to evaluate her chest and buttocks. Very nice. Any guy should consider himself lucky to be hooked up with a beautiful woman like her.

Lucy opened the bottom drawer of her dresser and removed a sheer lacy cream-colored shawl. She bought it about a year ago on a whim for the night when she would be with a man. Any man, she sighed ruefully, as she stripped and slipped her bare arms through the short sleeves. The garment fell a few inches below her crotch. Lucy glanced in the mirror and marveled at how sexy she looked in it. A shame to look so pretty for nobody but herself.

Lucy turned off the light and slipped under the covers. She lay on her back, staring at the dark ceiling, fantasizing of how it would be with her dream man. Lucy's fingers delicately caressed her flesh under the flimsy negligee. She closed her eyes and imagined it was a man's fingers touching her. His warm palms gently massaging and caressing her flesh. God, how she longed to be treated like a woman, even if it was by a stranger for only one night. Lucy's fingers traced around the full mounds of her breasts and over her tummy. How wonderful it would be to feel loved.

That was all she really wanted. Simply to be loved and be allowed to love someone in return. It had always been that way with her father. The man adored her and Lucy cherished him in return. Lucy expelled a long deep sigh and shifted her body under the covers. Perhaps someday she would find her Mister Right.

The little silver bell jingled over the door as Lucy strolled into the front office of the Fast Lanes auto repair shop. The garage was located on the West side of town, less than three miles from Lucy's father's house. Lucy used to ride her bicycle to the shop when she was younger. She now drove a white Honda Accord to work; the same car she bought with her own money on her 18th birthday.