So now you're going to learn more about my life than you probably want to know. But that weekend with Grace and Kale was such a crazy couple of days, I had to write it down. Skip to the end for the sex, but if you really want to know what happened, read on. I just hope neither Kale nor Grace read this.
Things went from awesome to shitty so quickly after that Friday night it made my head spin. My physics breakthrough was still humming inside me like a power line, and Grace was...well she was awesome. As much as I hate the word, something about her was special. Maybe she even felt the same about me a little. I was afraid to even think it, but maybe I had found someone I could have a real relationship with. I have never had luck in that area, but it was impossible not to hope.
Then the shit hit the fan. Actually it was a shit-fan trifecta. It started with Kale.
She picked me up at Grace's house and I loaded my bike and my shit into the back of her BMW wagon. I got in the car and she took off. She started asking about my thesis, and then she talked about girl's night out, and then she looked at me and stopped talking. Then she said, "Kelly, you didn't."
"Didn't what?"
She just looked at me.
"What? Watch the road, will you? Jesus Christ!"
"Unbelievable. Unbelievable, Kelly. She is my friend!"
"Hey, whoa whoa, back the truck up..."
"How could you be that insensitive!"
"Hey! Now hold on just a second! She came on to me! And anyway it wasn't like that, I really kind of..."
"I trusted you! I thought I knew you! I can not believe you did this!"
"Kale, will you shut the fuck up and listen to me for one second? I like her! A lot, maybe, I don't..."
She pulled over, staring straight ahead. "You're home. Get out of my car please."
No sooner was I standing at the side of the road than she screeched off into the cold darkness, leaving me confused and upset. I went inside, emailed my findings to my thesis professor and tossed and turned for a few hours till my alarm went off.
I got up to swim, and then went to work for a few hours, seriously dragging ass, but still mostly happy in spite of Kale losing it on me. Then I got home and checked my email. My prof (not Kale, thank god, although she had hinted around at wanting the job) had emailed me back and pointed out a major problem. My models only dealt with particles in the known universe, but was affected by particles outside the universe. A huge oversight. Enormous, catastrophic, and utterly stupid. The entire paper, the entire concept, was scuttled. I was fucked. I lowered my forehead to the desk. Months of work. All those late nights. Everything I thought I knew. I am such an idiot. I should have been a philosophy major, they don't do wrong answers.
And the worst was, I was so sure I had it right. How could I be that stupid? I'm not saying I cried, it is so not my thing, but if I did who would blame me?
I decided I needed to focus on something positive. Kale had given me Grace's number when she set up the sitting gig, and I chewed my lip looking at her number. Then I dialed fast before I could chicken out.
"Hello?" Her voice is so pretty, I thought. I sound like a honking goose. Shut the fuck up Kelly. You're just making yourself feel worse.
"Grace! Hi. It's me. It's Kelly."
"Kelly? What do you want?"
What do I want? "Uh...nothing. I was just..."
"You're unbelievable. You fucked me, tore out of here like a bat out of hell, and then you told one of my best friends about it. Are you calling to gloat? You wanted another ride on the merry-go-round? Well fuck you!"
"No! Grace! I..."
"I am not gay! Okay? I am 100% straight!" She was crying now. "I was hurting and you...you used me! And then you bragged about it! To my friend, Kelly. Do you have any idea how I feel right now? Do you even care? You...you bitch!"
I was too stunned to speak.
She blew out a breath. "Why am I even wasting my time talking to you. Goodbye Kelly." She hung up.
I blinked and then hung up the phone. I looked at my watch. It's a heart rate monitor too, but I wasn't wearing the chest strap. It said it was 1:33. So fifteen hours ago I was on top of the world. Now my life had turned into a pile of shit.
So I did what I always do when my life is shit. I skipped out on everything and went for a bike ride.