The nights had gotten long and boring. It had been months since I had anyone sharing my bed with me. The last time was a one night stand with a nice looking blond haired, blue eyed man named Jonathan. I truly thought that I would love to spend some more time with him, but he saw things different, the son of a bitch. There had been so many times like that previously that I had become frustrated. I guess my self esteem had taken a nose dive, because I had become content with staying in my apartment, watching television or reading a book.
My mother knew something was wrong, but she really couldn't peg what it was. If she only knew. I think she would be shocked that her only daughter really loved sex and had led a fairly promiscuous lifestyle. I was twenty two and still an emotional virgin, unfortunately. I had sex frequently after my sixteenth birthday, but I had never truly been attached to anyone. I know my mother was concerned about that. I never brought anyone home, and I never made those special phone calls to someone on Sunday afternoons while I was at mom's house. There was always the possibility that one day I would meet someone and fall head over heels for that person, as my Uncle Ralph had teased. He basically said I would fall hard and the right man would make me wonder why I had not gotten involved emotionally before. The only things I was really attached to, though, was my vibrator and dildo.
I didn't quite understand what was wrong. I am a nice looking young lady or so I have been told. My blond hair and athletic build have turned the heads of more than one man, for sure. My uncle, my biggest supporter, told me once, when I was eighteen, that I needed to pose for Playboy, but I really never had the desire. My nurse friends at the hospital I work for, suggested I might make a little extra money stripping. I have always been a little too self conscious for those kinds of things, preferring one night stands and individuals to crowds. It was enough to put on an act in a nightclub to see if someone would pick me up.
I was straight, but dissatisfied. I was good looking, but insecure. The problem was with me and I had to create a solution that would get me a relationship that would be fulfilling emotionally and physically. Instead of hanging out in the bars and nightclubs, I decided to hang in a different location with a different set of people. I chose a bookstore, the big chain bookstore with the coffee shop built in. I would read and drink mocha frappuccinos until I would zing my way to work. In my second month trying my new lifestyle, I was becoming more and more disappointed. At one point, I put my head down on the book I was reading and began sobbing gently.
"What's wrong?" a female voice asked gently.
"Nothing, just feeling a little sorry for myself," I replied. I raised my head to see a young woman standing above me with a cup of coffee and a sweet roll.
"Its just really sad to see someone crying in the middle of the bookstore," the cute brunette said. "Can I sit with you?"
"I really just want to be left alone to wallow in my misery," I said managing to sneak out a little smile. "but thank you for offering."
"I 'm in here all the time, by the way, so if you ever have the need to talk, I am available. I've noticed you here before and I've wanted to come introduce myself, but I wasn't sure whether you really wanted company. I couldn't tell what you were doing, reading or looking." A gentle smile enhanced her face.
"Thank you for that. I hadn't thought anyone noticed me. The fact that you did helps me a little. I guess I am looking for Mr. Goodbar in the wrong place. I felt that it would be better to try to meet men in a place like this than in a nightclub," I admitted. I didn't really know why I said this to a stranger, but it seemed to help a little that I had confessed my ulterior motive for being in the coffee shop of the bookstore.
"It sounds like you need a friend, someone you can talk to about whatever you want," she commented. "I know you want to be left alone, but if you are willing one day soon, maybe we should get together. I would enjoy the company and the conversation. I'll see you later, perhaps."
"I'm so sorry. Please sit. I can't believe how rude I must have come off."
The young woman was average, yet elegant. She wore little makeup, but the natural beauty of her face said she really didn't need any. Sitting down across from me, she showed grace in her mannerisms that told me she wasn't simply another girl. There was refinement within the young woman.
"My name in Gloria," she said as she offered her hand.
I took her warm hand in mine and shook it gently. "Mine is Diana."
