It is the swimsuit that does it. Tops it off, puts the icing on the cake, perfects the image. Kind of strange, really. A swimsuit is supposed to be an item of decency, I guess. To cover up the naughty bits, so that on-lookers and passers-by can stay calm and keep cool. But Lana's swimsuit on Lana's body is doing quite the opposite.
I am lying on my back in my bikini, raised up a little, resting my elbows on the blanket in the soft sand. Looking at the glistening sea over Lana's beautifully curved bottom. It is a hot day, we have just been in the water. Her one-piece swimsuit is all white, a sharp contrast to her damp, dark-brown skin. It vanishes between her arching buttocks in sharp angles, as if the lines were meant to guide the eye. You follow them, contemplate where they go, maybe you even feel drawn towards them. Without the swimsuit it would just be a nice rounded bottom. The suit fashions it into a tempting invitation.
I smile a little bit to myself, because I am ogling her, and having these thoughts, and she doesn't know it. Nobody knows it, except for me. I have known it for some time now. Known how it is with me. A snug little secret that I keep to myself. But also frustrating, increasingly so in the last few weeks. I need to act, to get somewhere, come out. But I am lacking the moment, the opportunity.
The right person, as well. Of course it cannot be with Lana. She was with Martin for a long time, several months. OK, they broke up, but I guess it is still a sign. One of those little signs in nature. I should not endanger our friendship by trying to come out towards her. It is too good for that. A very good friendship, actually, even though we have only known each other for half a year or so. Sometimes you just hit it off with the right person. And then it can be confusing if you are also coming to terms with yourself. But Lana is straight, nothing to be mistaken about, no need to complicate things.
A fly is crawling over her right buttock, just next to the swimsuit line. Two flies. She is lying face down, relaxed, doesn't seem to mind. I would like to be one of those flies. Explore her curves, her smooth skin. Maybe crawl down between the arcs, into that deep where the shiny white fabric of the swimsuit is vanishing. Can you be envious of a fly? I guess so. Is it ridiculous? For sure!
A couple of flies land on my left foot, and begin to crawl around. I shake them off. It pops my little mental bubble, annoys me.
"Damn those flies!"
Lana looks up from her blanket, her eyes like shiny black diamonds.
"They are harmless, you know."
"But they are annoying! And there are so many of them in this place. Why did you want us to lie here?"
"This part is nice and quiet. We have it all to ourselves."
"Because of the flies!"
"Maybe. You know, I have a mental trick to deal with them."
"Oh yeah?"
"I relax, and imagine they are the fingertips of my lover, exploring my body, tickling and teasing me in unexpected places."
"But they are all over the place!"
"Just like the lover I want!"
"You mean to say you are lying here having erotic fantasies right now?"
"Not right now!"
"But just before?"
"Maybe!" She sends me a naughty, or maybe just guilty, little smile. I come to think of those two flies crawling on her just a moment ago. What I was thinking. What was she thinking? Who was she thinking of?
"You should try it!" she says, smiling more broadly, glistening her white teeth at me. She has turned around on the side. I can just make out the cleavage under the rim of her swimsuit.
"I don't think I'll ever get to like flies!"
"It's just a mind trick. And the flies are harmless. Try it. Relax and enjoy!"
Lana's enthusiasm is cute, as always. I don't want to be a spoil-sport. I lie down onto my back, close my eyes, relax and wait. The sun is warm on my skin, a slight cool touch of breeze interrupts its glow for a moment. The gentle sounds of the sea are soothing, and help me to relax. A fly lands on my left leg. Then another on my right thigh. I try to apply the mind trick. The annoying flies become curious, exploring fingertips. Lana's fingertips. Now there are four, five, moving all over my legs. She must be sitting over me, straddling my belly, facing towards the sea. The v-shape of her swimsuit, vanishing between her diverging buttocks, is hovering right in front of my face. She is tickling me softly, gently.
More fingertips appear on my torso. She must have changed her position. Maybe she is lying on her side, next to me. The thought makes the tickling feeling go deeper into me, subtle sub-surface itches and twitches. Two fingers crawl up the inside of my thighs. Will they go on to circle my sweet spot, under the smooth fabric of my bikini? There are many more fingers over my legs, arms and torso now. She must have assumed some kind of multi-armed form. One finger walks slowly towards my left breast. In a little moment she will undo the bikini top, and surround the nipple with her lips. And then the tongue will appear, ever so soft and nimble..
"Looks like it is working!" Lana's voice snaps me out of my fly-fantasy. I stir, and most of the flies lift off. I realize that my pulse is elevated, and my mouth is dry.
"What do you mean?"
"You looked like you were excited!"
"How so?"
"Your lips were coming a bit apart, and you were kind of stirring, very gently."
"Well, maybe I was excited, then!" I say with a smile.
"So who was it?"
"Who was what?"
"The lover you were thinking about."
I laugh. "You don't want to know!"
"Yes I do!"
"No you don't. Trust me on this!"
"Why wouldn't I want to know? I am single now. Jealousy is not an issue."
I feel the ground slipping away under me. Probably I should just invent some lover to appease her. But somehow I can't get myself to do it. Besides, I already went too far down this path.
"Just trust me!"
She is resting on her elbow, looking down at me with that smile she always wears when she knows she has me out on a limb. Her breasts are really curving the fabric of the swimsuit now. The nipples are just visible.
"You know, there can really only be one reason for you to think that I wouldn't want to know!"
"And that is?" I ask dumbly, although I perfectly well know the answer.
"I don't think I have to explain that to you!"
"You mean that.." I am not sure how to finish the sentence. There is a kind of soft shivering picking up in my body.
"That you were thinking of me? Yes, that is exactly what I mean!"
"What on earth makes you think that?"
"Well, for one thing, my eyes are up here!"