Dearest reader
I hope you are well. Thanks for sticking with this story (obviously, if you are a new reader, I strongly suggest you go back and read parts 1 to 3 first, otherwise this really isn't going to make much sense.)
A little caveat to this Chapter: Amanda isn't into certain things. That's not a criticism of you if you are. Each to their own. Amanda's a character - she's not real. Don't confuse the character's views with the author's.
Happy reading!
Love T x
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Carrie - Thursday
"Hey Carrie!" Amanda throws her arms around my neck. I bend down a little as I reciprocate, so she doesn't have to stand on tiptoes. Her body feels great against mine, warm and soft, and I have to hold myself back from sniffing her hair. Stop it Carrie!
"Hey you! Sorry, have you been waiting long?" We're outside the Psychology department building where my tutorial has just finished.
"No, like, just got here. Just handed my essay in." She does a little dance in the street. I can't help but smile.
"Isn't that a little early?" We start walking towards the Union. We've got rehearsal in 30 minutes.
"Yeah, like, two weeks ahead of deadline, but, like, it's done! I mean, if I don't hand it in now then, like, I'll just keep fiddling and tweaking with it, and it'll make no difference at all, you know? But
now
, I can focus on my Drama assessment without that hanging over me."
"Well done!"
It's a warm day, the scent of the blossom on the trees going someway to mask the traffic fumes as we head towards the Triangle. I take my coat off and sling it over my bare arms. Amanda is likewise sleeveless. I try to resist checking out her shoulders. I mean, I'll see it all shortly, but it's hard to resist.
"So, like, your Mum called me..."
"What? How did she.... Oh, wait, Cameron."
"Yeah!" She giggles. "Anyway, she's, like, invited me to lunch at your house on Sunday."
"What? I mean, cool, that would be lovely but..."
"I know. I get it."
"So what did you say?" My heart's hammering. It's as if I've asked her on a date and I'm waiting for her reply.
"I said I could come though I might, like, need picking up, you know?"
"Sure!" I smirk. "But... Um... What about Lucy?"
A cloud passes over her face. "She goes back to London, like, every weekend."
"That's a bit strange."
"Yes! Thank you! That's what I thought, but she said I was, like, making a big deal of it."
"Could you not go with her?" I immediately kick myself. Stupid mouth.
We walk in front of the columned entrance to the Victoria Rooms.
"Yeah, I, like, offered to come, but she said this weekend was all about family, but maybe in a couple of weeks. But, you know, I am starting to wonder, like, maybe..." She looks at me.
I finish her thought. "You think that she's got somebody in London?"
"Yes! See, good, somebody else thinks that too. Sarah said I was just being, like, paranoid."
"Have you cyberstalked her?"
"She doesn't do social media. Her Facebook page is dead - like, nothing since Uni. Her Linkedin is, like, super impersonal. I mean, given her job that's not surprising. But, like, another thing: she doesn't want us to take photos together."
"Really?"
"She said it's, like, 'cos I'm not out yet, but you know, surely that's up to me? And, like, anyway, it
is
possible to take photos and not put them online."
"Oh my days, really? That's so 1990!"
She swats at me. "Shut up!"
I grin. Is it wrong to be happy that things aren't going smoothly for her and Lucy? Or am I just kidding myself: isn't it just easier for me to be back in this place, lusting after somebody unattainable? If Amanda was single and interested, wouldn't I be back to putting as much distance between us as possible?
"But otherwise things are cool between you too?"
Her mouth is a thin line. "Yeah, like, I suppose so? When we're together, it's, like, great. I mean, she goes in less than two weeks and we haven't, like, talked about what happens next, you know?" She sighs. "I'm seeing her later. I mean, half of me wants to push her to, like, I don't know, be real about it, but, like, the other half of me wants to just enjoy what we've got, without ruining it by getting all serious, you know?"
She looks at me. "Like, what do you think I should do Carrie?"
"Fuck, I don't know!" Oh bollocks, what do I do now? "There's no point asking me for advice. Do whatever makes you happy, I guess?" I shrug my shoulders.
She nods. "Yeah, that sounds like a good plan."
I hold the door to the Union open for her and we go in.
* * *
"Keke, what do you want me to do here?" Suzy asks.
We're stretching off, ready to start rehearsing the end of Act 2. It's going to be very difficult technically speaking, as Eve has to give birth to Cain in this scene, except, according to Miller, Cain is born an adult. Yeah, tricky. It does mean that Amanda has to wear clothes, to hide the pregnancy bump, which I can't decide if I'm pleased or disappointed about. My role in this scene is minimal, standing mostly to one side, Eve wanting me, but Chemuel giving comfort instead. Hmmm, well, I shouldn't have any problems relating to that.