"Can I ask you a personal question?" Raine said after a small silence. Lily turned slightly in her seat to face the young woman.
"Certainly, as long as I can ask one in return." Lily replied. Raine hesitated only a fraction of a second before agreeing. Lily would know the worst already. If Palmer hadn't told her Daisy definitely would have.
"I've done a lot of research over the last few years on the shit, pardon me, the things females in my situation go through and a lot of what I've read lists molestation and rape as a reason for lesbianism. I've thought about it on many occasions, have found myself attracted to females before but have never acted on it." Raine lied telling herself not to feel guilty about it. She and Erica had agreed they would keep what they had shared between them and not even Brandi or Shalom, their respective best friends, knew. "Do you think that sexual abuse is an accurate reasoning to explain homosexuality being so...abundant?" Raine inquired choosing her words carefully. She had already decided she wanted to write a story involving a lesbian. Between Lily and Erica she could gain some valuable insight into the lifestyle. She was also interested in Lily's method of expressing herself. Erica was a very intellectual woman and would need someone who could hold her own in conversation.
Lily was momentarily speechless. Of all the things she had thought Raine might ask her that was not one of them. She opened her mouth to speak then closed it again when she realized she had no words. Raine waited patiently and there was a definite air of anticipation in the car. "I believe that there are a surprising number of gays out there who choose the lifestyle because to their way of thinking it's much easier than dealing with the alternative which is having to face the pain of whatever they went through with a member of the opposite sex. I also believe there are situations where a person is hurt by someone of the same sex at a young age and uses it as an excuse for what they desire. In both instances it is just an excuse. No amount of pain can cause a person to want to be with a person of the same sex if it is not something they are...preprogrammed for, for lack of a better term. The predilection has to be there already. They use it, whether consciously or not, as a means of giving themselves a justification. I also know there are those of us, a large majority of us, who simply recognize a preference for someone like them. I have never been raped or molested by anyone of any sex. I simply recognized at a young age that I was not into boys. To answer your question though; yes it's accurate to a degree. It's accurate in that there are those who fall into that category. But it is inaccurate in portraying it as though that is the majority or the whole of the gay community." She finally replied. "I hope I don't offend you by saying this Raine, but that was a surprisingly insightful question." Lily admitted. Raine smiled softly.
"I know you're trying to feel me out." She said simply as she came to a stop at a red light. She glanced over at Lily and was pleased to see the woman did not feign ignorance. She merely waited for Raine to continue. "I know you're probably thinking either I'm a gold digger after Palmer's money, or he's gone crazy and is now robbing the cradle unthinkably. I don't blame you for those thoughts, I'd have them too if our roles were reversed. I'm certain, nevertheless, that you'll grow to love me and see how much I love Palmer. However, I do need to make this statement, not because I really believe you are the type to be close-minded, but because it'll make me feel better knowing I've put it out there just in case." Raine began.
"Go ahead." Lily encouraged fascinated with the way the young woman put her words together, the fact that she took time to think about what she was going to say and the fact that she wasn't afraid to speak her mind despite Lily being older than her. From what she'd heard about the way this girl was six months ago, Raine's progress was commendable.
"I'm young in all the ways that draw attention, speculation and judgment but not in the ways that matter. I'm sure you know of my past. I don't know if you were given the gory details or a sugar-coated version but Bernard Butler forced me into adulthood early. I love my friends to death but there are times when I can't even fathom what they are talking about. It's so trivial to me. Palmer is never trivial. Palmer...excites me mentally, I don't feel like I need to prove I'm not a child to him, he never talks to me as though I'm not on the level, yet at the same time he's showing me how to have fun. I love him like I never thought I would be able to love anyone and no matter what happens I'm for him until the day he says he doesn't want me anymore. So whether you approve of me or not, I don't care. I'm confident we'll get along great. Daisy loves me, don't you?" Raine added playfully to Lily's twin.
"Sure do. Relax big sister. Raine is the genuine article and frankly Palmer's lucky to have her." Daisy praised and Lily nodded slowly. She would, of course, ask again when they were alone but she didn't sense any deceit in her sister.
"I like you already. I can see why Palmer is gone over you. Now, it's my turn for a question." Lily stated. Raine nodded and waited.
Lily took a minute to think about what she really wanted to know most. She decided to not hold back. "Are you sleeping with him?" She requested. Daisy inhaled sharply but Raine merely smiled that soft smile of hers.
"I could say a lady doesn't kiss and tell but I don't really think I'm a lady, plus it wouldn't be fair since you were so candid with your answer. No, Palmer and I are not sleeping together as far as engaging in sexual intercourse. He's very respectful of my needs and wants, and my comfort level. We're working on a slow sexual...courting if you will. A step by step thing. First it was just kissing. His hands never went lower than my waist, never to my chest or anything. It was nice. It was a physical display of the fact that I could trust him. He doesn't ask for more than I can give. We moved on from there, a few touches, then more in depth exploration. He helped me become more comfortable in my own skin, let me learn his body at my own pace. I don't know how much you want to know." Raine warned. Lily waved her on.
"We're not squeamish Daisy and I. Give us the goods."
"Well last month we graduated to oral sex. He won't let me do him and sometimes I worry that it's because of how I learned. I wonder if he's afraid he'll be...disgusted by me when I do it. I haven't gotten up the courage to ask him. I'd hate to put the thought in his head if it wasn't there. I get nervous sometimes when he asks if he can do me. I guess I'm not completely comfortable with my body yet, but it always feels good. Jesus, does it feel good." She said the last mostly to herself. Lily looked back at her twin and barely kept her grin in check.
"You know, there are a lot of women who would happily let their man give them head and not worry about the fact that they can't do him in return. Hell a lot of them wouldn't even think to return the favor. Is it important to you?" Lily inquired.
"Yeah, it is. I realized not long after I started seeing him that it was vital to me. I didn't necessarily think of it in terms of sex. Just the knowledge that his happiness, his pleasure was a top priority to me. I really don't believe there could ever be anyone else for me so part of it is fear of losing him. I want to make sure that whatever he wants he gets so he never has a reason to stray. I argue with myself constantly about things that fall into that category. I've started to develop self-respect and I don't want to put myself in a position where I am not getting the appreciation that I deserve. It's hard, finding a happy medium, but I'm working on it. I don't think he has cause for complaint to date." Raine responded.
Lily merely nodded her understanding. Conversation turned to lighter topics and Raine decided Lily would be perfect for Erica.
They arrived at the mall and Raine found a parking spot close to the door. The women exited the car and headed in, ready to dedicate a couple of hours to the cause. An hour after they arrived they were pursuing the lingerie section of Macy's when Raine noticed Lily checking out a female by the make-up counter. The woman was openly staring back at Lily and Raine was torn between watching what Lily would do and interrupting so that Lily wouldn't be snatched up before she could introduce her to Erica. She was saved the trouble of having to make a decision by Erica herself. "Hey ladies." she said coming up behind Raine and placing a kiss on her cheek. She turned to do the same to Lily mistaking her for Daisy but stopped short when she got close to her. "I'm terribly sorry. I thought you were Daisy." She said with a sheepish grin as she straightened. Lily had completely forgotten the make-up counter chick. The woman before her was captivating. She had a weakness for studs like this one.
"It's okay sweetie. We get that all the time."
"I'm Erica." She said extending her hand.
"Lily." The smaller woman returned accepting the shake. As soon as their flesh touched a vision slammed into Erica.
She moans loud and long as her hips rock gently back and forth, teasing herself against full lips and a firm tongue. Lily's body is taut with her need. She shudders as smooth, strong arms wrap around her thighs bringing her to a stop. Lips encase her clit and she moans again as they begin to suck.
Lily is near her finish. It will be her turn then. She will be able to explore her lovers' body at her leisure, taking time to lavish attention on breasts, stomach, thighs...her thoughts trail off as a finger finds its way deep inside of her. The finger strokes in and out, coating itself with what they affectionately call her 'love juice'. A second finger joins the first and each time they slide inside her, they press against the spot that makes her muscles spasm. Lily's fingers slide into her lover's hair and press the lips and tongue working her into a fever pitch, closer. Finally, after three last, fast, hard thrusts in tandem with the movement of tongue against enflamed clitoris, Lily closes her eyes and surrenders to the powerful explosions wracking her body. Her back arches as she screams the only thing she can, the only thought in her head, her lovers' name. "Erica! Oh, my God!"
