Charmaine looked across the dinner table at the woman sitting opposite. She paused for a few moments before saying 'No, I've never been with a woman'. It had been a hell of a question and Charmaine felt a mixture of excitement – at the thrill of it all – and anger – at being asked such a personal question, by someone she had only met for the first time earlier that day.
Charmaine and Kathryn were both in Oslo, attending perhaps the most tedious Human Resources conference known imaginable. Two and half days of policies, procedures, case studies – none of them especially interesting – and legislation. Lots of legislation. Both worked for different London firms and both were new to Oslo, a city that offered an almost quaint gentility, but precious little in the way of excitement. It reminded Charmaine of what the 1950s must have been like ...
Today was the second day – they would both be flying home on separate flights the next afternoon. They had hooked up at one of the breakout sessions; both clearly bored and rather baffled as to why their respective companies had sent them on this predictable exercise. They had made a half-hearted attempt at the task in hand and then sat together for the rest of the day, making notes, swapping occasional stories and getting to know each other, both grateful to have found a kindred spirit.
They had resolved that they would spend the evening in their hotel's Skyline bar – it promised food and drink and a never-to-be-forgotten view of the city. Well the view was wonderful – they could see the Royal Palace in its icy glory – but the food was ordinary and the alcohol was ridiculously expensive. However Kathryn had a seemingly limitless expenses account and so they had got quietly piddled as the evening progressed.
They had talked about work, then work colleagues, their mutual love of the gym, their mutual love of the new James Bond, then more movies, then music, then food, then work again and now, finally, their relationships. Charmaine was recently divorced, but now dating an ex work mate and already wondering how to get out of it. Kathryn was single and loving it. The conversation had inevitably turned to sex. They had exchanged a few mild sex stories and now had come Kathryn's 'bombshell' question.
"Nope" Charmaine repeated, "Never ... Why, er, do you ask?" Kathryn laughed – a lovely laugh, Charmaine had already decided.
"Oh I don't know. We live in The Modern World. We're all multi-sexual now aren't we?"
"Don't you mean bisexual, you idiot" It was Charmain's turn to laugh, "Multi sexual suggests having sex with, well, anything!"
"Oooh, I like it!! Go on then, what's the weirdest thing you've had sex with?"
"Kathryn! For chrissakes! What a question!" Nonetheless, Charmaine searched for an answer "Well, I suppose I had a boyfriend once who reminded me of a Munchkin". Charmaine had surprised herself with her quip. Kathryn almost spilled her G&T, her body trying to suppress her giggles as the restaurant was still pretty busy. She took a few deep breaths, a huge smile on her face.
"Do you have any sex toys?" she said.
Charmaine's eyed widened. "I'm not answering that! Well, anyway, no I bloody don't!"
Kathryn affected a serious expression, lowering her voice in a conspiratorial whisper. "I do" she said "Don't mind admitting it. Anyway, I've done worse than that: Used a hairbrush handle once!"
"Oh for Fuck's sake Kathryn, you can't tell me these things!"
