Ken and I had followed the Navy after his OCS and two short-hitch postings for him to Pensacola, Florida. His work as a flight controller was stable enough so it looked as though we might just be here awhile. I put my Journalism degree to use and found work with a small magazine and they seemed pretty happy to have me. So we were the typical duel income, no kids (and none wanted for now at least), nice house on the water, late to middish 20s yuppy puppies you hear about. With lots of laughs and love, I guess we were about as happy as we could get. Tom and Laura had been our neighbors for about four years ever since we moved back in 99. If there was a nicer couple, I don’t know ‘em. We literally met as we drove up in our Renta-truck. Tom was mowing the lawn and Laura was “digging in the dirt” as she calls gardening, but he turned off the mower and came over with his perfect white smile and introduced himself. Laura sort of glided over on the longest pair of legs in the world and the next thing we knew they just pitched in and spent the rest of the next two days unloading our truck with us. That was that, we were friends. Tom was a software designer for a local company and Laura was a nurse at the hospital here. Over the course of the next few years, we became about as close as friends can get. Yes, that way too and yes, I do love Laura as much as Tom but Ken and Tom are men’s men only although both of us girls have been sandwiched happily.
But this story is about the boat. That boat! Holy Shit! THE BOAT! Tom’s Boat. Tom built this boat, see, for about three years in his garage. Well, what of it would fit. Said it was to honor his Viking heritage. I had to ask Laura, who looks like a Viking, what kind of boat he was building and she sort of ‘Haaarumphs’ with her arms crossed and recites in her best Tom imitation as follows: “The Dragon Boat is a 27 foot, 5 inch, deep hull, twin marine, blown v-8, catamaran, with
electronics
.” Then she looked at me and says, “And it costs as much as a small country.” Little did both of us know just how much we were going to enjoy the ‘electronics.’ Tom’s one fault was that he could be a bit of a techno nerd at times. Not that Ken thought this was a fault at all. Oh no, he willingly encouraged him.
“We might be able to get the canopies fabricated from the Luftanzare Barkesea in Gestwertz for a heck of a lot better deal than here in the states. Lemme see what I can do on base.” Real help.
Then, just when you’d think the thing is ready for the water, he up and spends another three whole months on some “Secret weapons development,” project he won’t tell any of us about involving computers and machining and boxes delivered with what looks like dashboards and upholstery. But finally the big day is here and he takes each of us for a ride.
I’m telling you, the “passenger” pod is pretty spartan. There is room to sort of stand with a little half-seat/cradle, and a helmet that has a radio in it. Tom puts the helmet on me and checks to make sure the radio is in place, then Laura takes one wrist and Ken takes the other and together they lower all “5’2” eyes of blue, Oh what those five feet can do,” 104 lbs soaking wet (and I want so much not to be for the next little while) into the pod. My helmet fits between the arms of this padded cradle thingy and I have to stretch tippy-toe to touch the floor while my pus is grinding against the saddle because the set-up is made for someone a bit taller than lil’-ole me. It’s made for Laura.
Side story! One night not all that long after we had met, we all got ourselves snockered and I said, “So how long are them legs, anyhow?” Laura’s one vanity is her legs. Not that she doesn’t deserve to be vain about those things. My God you just never saw such a pair of legs. Any way she uses the old, “From my ass to the ground,” line and smuggy smiles and the next thing you know we got out the tape measure. She jumps up from the table and says, “Check out that inseam.”
“Nope,” I say because I’m smashed and because I’m feeling a little wicked and well, you know, ‘cause she’s really cute and maybe tonight the way things are going I can get a little. “Nope,” I say, “A true measurement should not have the shorts in the way.”
There is this silence as Tom and Ken look at each other with this “Oh-Ho!” look, and then she leans over and plants a wet one right on my lips and unsnaps the button on her jeans shorts and peals out of ‘em. And the only thing under the shorts is blonde and there just ain’t much of that, lemme tell ya!
“Holy shit,” I whisper. “A real Blonde.” And she just smiles and turns around and bends over enough so I can see her lips are pink and tiny and I’m thinkin’ everyone can hear me get wet. I got to hold the tape against her clit. Thank you. Tom and Ken can hold it to the floor. From clit to carpet she’s 34 inches tall. Hang on, she’s only 5 foot 7 inches total! Do the math and that is an abnormal stretch of leg we got on this woman.
Oh yeah! To answer your question, we did.
Back to the main story. They closed the limo-dark canopy and I’m all, “This is NOT fun!” Then Tom is in his pod and I hear his voice on the radio saying, “Here we go, Randy!”
And the most unbelievable roar blasts my back as those engines come to life. Must be something in my blood. Maybe my Mama was this 50’s bad girl in a motorcycle gang because I swear I go horny all over. Dragon Boat is barely moving out of the marina and Tom’s on the radio shouting, “What’s wrong, honey? You ok?”
So do I tell him what the engine vibes through the saddlele are doing to my clit? Or that I have no choice but to grind against the thing? Oh hell, “Toooooommmmy, you got a gggooooooood boat!” I moan!
He gets it and laughs and opens her up. What a ride!!! Twenty minutes of high-speed thrill and do I mean thrill. I came, (ha, I just got that!) back all 104 pounds soaking wet.
About a couple months after the launching, I noticed a trend. Every time Tom and Laura go for a ride, Laura comes back exhausted, and I’m thinking I know what is going on. I mean they gotta be going out to the key and doin’ it the way that thing gets a girl primed, but, wow, am I, like, so wrong.
This one time right after they got back, Laura is hanging in the jacuzzi with a drink and I head over to “Sympathize.”
“So, how ya doin’? Jahavagudride?”
She sort of props open an eye and looks at me. “I don’t know whether I love that boat,” she takes a sip, “or I hate that boat.”
“Yer kidden, right?” I think this is a case of she ‘doth complain too much.’ She just wants me to be jealous of how much she’s getting. “I’d be thinking you’d be getting used to it by now.”
She sort of shakes her head and says, “There is no getting used to what he has in that thing!”