There are things you learn about a person by living with them that you wouldn't learn any other way. Like the way they lean against a wall to smoke... How they like their socks folded... Why they insist on sleeping on a specific side of the bed... How they screen their phone calls... What it's like for them to watch their favorite sports team losing to their least favorite sports team... And how fast they finish a meal if they know company won't leave until it's all gone.
As I watched you eat the dinner we'd prepared, I prayed silently that you wouldn't choke. Somehow I managed not to laugh as I watched you attempt to get the rest of the table to eat as quickly as you were. It was comical, really. Then Katherine, a new co-worker of yours, commented, "Mel, the chicken is dead. I'm pretty sure it won't run away from you. You can slow down."
The color your face changed to could be called "crimson". When I laughed, you eyed me and replied, "You just don't know, Katherine, how much I love the taste of chicken."
Oh shit. Breathe, Savi. In that moment, I knew what you were referring to, but no one else caught on. For years you'd called me "chicken". It's the term they use for unmarried women where you're from. I tried like hell not to show my own blushing cheeks off, and I succeeded for a moment or two...just long enough to attempt a witty and equally disguised reply to you, "Yes, you do love chicken." I turned to Katherine, "She likes her chicken hot. So she eats quickly. You know, so it doesn't get cold."
When the corners of your mouth twitched into a smile, I knew I was dead meat, "Yep. Nothing I like better than the taste of some well-seasoned, hot, juicy chicken."
Oh fuck you. I had to bite the inside of my lip and then pretend to drink in order to not absolutely lose all composure. Katherine, who clearly didn't get the innuendo, unknowingly played right into our underlying conversation, "Oh, me too! And this is so good! It just melts in your mouth."
You lifted your napkin to your mouth in a fake "wipe" but I knew you were laughing behind it. In that moment I didn't know whether to laugh out loud or kick you under the table. Then you shocked me by excusing yourself from the table, "Excuse me, please. I'm going to get more rolls."
Katherine, not realizing she was killing us slowly, added, "I just love this sauce! It's so thick and is a great compliment to the tender chicken. Really, it's very good. I almost want to lick it off the plate!"