Dilemma
is a Greek word meaning a problem which offers two possibilities neither of which is unambiguously acceptable or preferable. Another way that I've seen this being put to words is: "finding oneself impaled upon the horns of a dilemma". This phrase directly refers to the horns of a bull where both are equally sharp, uncomfortable and dangerous. Dilemmas of love can be all those things...
Once more I would like to dedicate this story to my wife. She's the love of my life and my endless source of inspiration. I would also like to thank my fans, all those people who took the time to read my stories and vote for them and all of you who took the time to leave a comment or write an e-mail. This is very important for me and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
This is the longest story I've ever written and it's definitely not a quick fix. There are quite a few sexy scenes described but these are not the main focus of this text. If this is not your cup of tea please exit now, you have been warned. Although this is a lesbian romance story there is an extensive hetero scene described. If you're not okay with that you can also exit now. There are also scenes were physical and psychological violence is used. You have been warned. All characters are of a legal age and entirely the product of my overzealous imagination.
Whenever you see italic text within a chapter this depicts the innermost thoughts of the character through whom we're viewing a scene. At the start of each chapter you'll find the name of the main character. Also present within this text are sentences and phrases in Greek. I've provided adequate translations within parentheses as needed, to the best of my ability. Where at a certain point more extensive translations or explanations were needed I've provided notes at the end of this text.
"Dilemmas of Love" is a sequel of sorts to "The Three Traditions of Pink". Most of the characters found here have made their appearance there so it is advisable that you read that first if you haven't already done so.
I do hope you'll enjoy this as much as I did writing it,
VF
*****
Chapter 1 (
Chloe)
The rhythmic, binary sound of her cellphone brought Chloe back to the reality of her surroundings. She had been slugging it out for hours, desperately trying to find a tolerable method to differentiate between the various forms of realism. Her exams where coming up and her desk was crammed with textbooks, papers and her laptop. She had been studying for six hours straight; she had started in the evening and now it was dark outside. For the past hour she had been fighting a losing battle with herself; her eyes simply refused to focus and the text was just dancing about.
Her dimly lit basement room felt a bit chilly. Her growling stomach reminded her that turning down the dinner offer that Emma and Abigail had extended earlier on had not been such a good idea. Chloe sat straight on her swivel chair and leisurely stretched like a cat taking in her surroundings. Her private space, she mused. For the past nine months she called this basement her home.
When Emma had moved in with Abigail, she had thought of this wild plan as a spur of the moment thing. Her whirlwind redhead friend had proposed that she move in with them. Being assigned a brand new roommate smack in the middle of the academic year wasn't the best of plans, Emma reasoned. Abigail had readily agreed and they practically made her an offer she couldn't resist; she wouldn't pay any rent, she'd just chip in what she could for the bills and the food. And it had worked surprisingly well so far except...well except for those moments when Abigail and Emma where staring at each other like puppies, but hey, who could blame them. They were deeply in love with each other and they were almost always very discreet. And in any case, it was their home she was living in.
Picking up her phone she checked the display. It read "Text Message from GT".
What now?
Swiping her phone to life she opened the message:
"Hey there babe. Was wondering if I could come over for some R&R... (Wink)"
Christ Trev...I'm neck deep in crap and all you can think of is poking the whiskers? What to do...what to do? I'll probably just say yes shake him off. Can't be bothered with any drama right now. What's the time again? Shit! It's half past ten! I still have mountains to go through! And I have to get up early tomorrow...
Trevor Gilford, also known as "GT" was Chloe's boyfriend...sort of. She had known him for quite a while and he had been persistent. Chloe didn't exactly have a list of suitors waiting on her so she finally acquiesced to dating him. Trevor wasn't a bad guy so to speak. He was a good student and was polite towards Chloe. His behavior was mature for his age; he didn't go binge drinking or partying or do any of those crazy stuff that college boys their age tended to do. But Chloe knew that she didn't love him. It just wasn't there. She cared about him but she didn't love him.
And the sex...well the sex was oh-kay-but... there just wasn't any spark in it and certainly it was nothing like the mind-numbing stuff that Emma would yap about with starry looking eyes. Their first time happened when Chloe decided to give it a try. And Trev really did try to bring her to orgasm, but somehow it never happened. Chloe would either fake it or wait for him to leave and then use her fingers or whatnot to bring herself off. In short, Trevor wasn't a bad guy but that statement largely explained the problem: he really didn't make Chloe's heart jump. And ever since they included sex in their relationship he'd always want to do that.
Isn't that what couples should want to do when they're together though?
It's just that without really planning for it, sex had degenerated into something that Chloe used to keep Trevor happy and away for a while. Without anything being said or done they had grown a bit more distanced this past month. Chloe had used their upcoming finals as an excuse to avoid seeing him. But tonight, she was really tired, she knew that she honestly wouldn't get any more productive studying done and well...
I'll just tell him to come over for a quickie to get him off my back. I really ought to clear this thing up...But not now...The last thing I want right now is emotional drama...Brrrr...
Picking up her phone she speed dialed him.
"Hey babe, got my text?"
"Hey Trev. Yeah..."
"And? Shall I come over?"
"Yeah...But Trev? Only for a little while okay? The girls are upstairs and I've got mountains to do and..."
"Just relax babe...All I want to do is make you feel good. I promise to keep it short. I'll be by your backyard door in say...ten?"
"Just be careful not to make any noise. Give me a ring and I'll come and open up."
And with that she pressed the red phone button killing the conversation.
Christ! Why did I think this was a good idea again? Oh yeah! Because telling him that we're most probably through is an even worse proposition. And what does "most probably" even mean? We're either through or we aren't! We are, but we don't want to face it. Correction: I don't want to face it!
The brunette made no beautification attempts and instead focused upon preparing her desk for the coming day's study-a-thon. Besides, why worry about clothes and stuff when all Trevor actually wanted was to take them off. Her sweats where just fine for that she reckoned. Easy to take off, easy to put back on.
Just as she had finished tidying up her notes her mobile rang once which was code for Trevor being outside her door. Chloe made a quick check on her pill calendar to see whether she was up to date. The last thing she wanted was (yikes!) an unwanted pregnancy and missing one's pills could result in just that. Satisfied with what she saw she hustled towards the door. Looming on the outside was Trevor's hunched figure.
Opening up she was offered a kiss on the lips which she reluctantly accepted.
"Heyah babe! It's been a while! You alright? You don't look so bright."
"Yeah, rough day...I've been at it for hours...my head's about to burst open."
"That's what I thought. That's why I decided to stop over...you know...to help you relax..."
