Civic Light Opera Internship

Civic Light Opera Internship - Ch. 1

Attempting Celibacy

A/N -

I would like to share with you the first chapter in the continuation of Frances' life story. This fun fictional jaunt will follow Frances as she begins the next chapter in her academic career and love life.

This storyline as well as the characters and names are purely fictional. If there is a chance of any misrepresentation, it is pure coincidence and not intended.

Any mistakes you see are mine; these eyes aren't what they used to be. Please enjoy and let me know what you think.

*****

August

It was the week before Labor Day; I was standing in line outside the Scheduling Office at Thayer Hall. I had my acceptance letter and a list of courses I was to have taken and completed during my first semester of my junior year at Point Park. This was all in preparation for me to meet the minimal requirements for admission into the internship. I also had the list of the upper level courses which the internship would substitute for class and course credit in order for me to graduate in four years.

My life was moving forward. I sat in a chair waiting for my turn. It was then I started reflecting on each of the amazing women who for over the past two years influenced, mentored and motivated me. Each of them played a special part whether it was good or bad, whether they knew it or not, each of them were responsible for guiding me to where I am today, in this moment, at this school and rearranging my schedule allowing me to take my next career step for the CLO Music internship.

As I heard my name called, I received a text. I looked at my phone.

"I knew you had it in you. See you in Chicago. Beth."

Nearly thirty minutes later and with the help of a wonderful older gentleman, my schedule was rearranged. He worked with me and got me the classes I needed to have completed for this first semester to meet the qualifications for the Spring Internship. I had Wednesday afternoons and Friday's free to work at Marcie's if I wanted.

Driving home, I received a notification of a new text message. Unfortunately my older car does not sync up with my phone and I would have to wait until I got home. I pulled into the driveway and right away pulled my phone from my backpack. It was a message of love from Michaela.

'Inspiration, love, hope and emptiness. I believe in and trust in you. M'

Her text brought tears to my eyes. I took a deep breath and in my mind I counted. It was twenty-two weeks until she would be home for Christmas break. Oh my heart yearned for her.

Oh gawd, twenty-two weeks seemed like a lifetime at this point.

*****

September

I set my alarm for seven, I had class at nine, eleven, one and at three-thirty Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. Wednesday mornings were my required "City-University Life" class. I tried to get out of that but I was a transfer, it was a core requirement.

Thankfully, they accepted all of my transfer credits from CCAC all but this City-University Life was completed. This semester would really start the Music and one other BFA requirement. I was ready, a full load for the fall semester but the internship starting in the Spring would carry the major load of the BFA requirements.

I sent a final text

'M, I already miss you liken to a needed nourishment; I am starving. F'

'Stop it, it has only been four days, get some sleep. M'

'Regardless I miss you M'

I woke up that morning and came out of the shower to text.

'I am out the door to work as is Momma, eat before you leave for class please. Mom.'

I smiled, even starting my junior year of college; she is a constant in my texts and my life. She knows I need a gentle reminder every now and then. I love her more than life itself and am blessed to have her in my life. I truly love both my Mom and my Momma.

I sat at breakfast and reviewed my notes and the changes I needed to make. I looked at my phone and realized it was time to leave. Dishes in the sink, trash where it belonged, lights off ...damn I almost forgot my phone charger.

Okay off I went; day one at Point Park. Forty minutes later I sat in my first class realizing that my life was moving forward.

Over the next three weeks I focused, I studied, I went to class and I worked at Marcie's on Friday and Saturdays. Life was flowing well, classes were great but I was really missing Michaela's voice, her smile, and yes a few other things.

I needed a break from the pattern I had set, Wednesday afternoon I walked into the place where I knew I could be protected, I walked into Marcie's, my haven.

I stood in line behind a rather large man. I mean large, tall and wide. Goodness he was at least two of me put together. I was flabbergasted! I almost said something but let's face it, reality isn't what is going on in my brain. He stepped out of line after ordering and paying and ... oh god!

I was flabbergasted again; there she was, up close and in person, Annalise. She smiled wide, like really wide, like devilishly wide.

"Hey Frances! I have missed you." Her voice is refreshing, tempting and an absolute chorus of pleasurable sounds to my ears.

Fuck ... she winked at me. I immediately reminded myself, do not, don't do it, and don't react to her, she will lure you in and take .... I snapped out of it.

"Hi Annalise, I am good, just a coffee and a scone whatever is left." I handed her seven dollars and walked away escaping further potential hypnosis from her beauty, from her smile, from her eyes, oh gawd, and her voice!

Gawd! I took a seat at a table near the back right corner, not my normal, I needed to hide. I reached for my phone. I needed her.

'I love you, I miss you, I need you M. I need your love.'

I opened my backpack and pulled the MUS 223, Ensemble Voices, textbook. This was a struggle. In directing, which eventually was the goal, I needed to master this class. I heard a familiar china sounding clank of a coffee mug and a saucer being placed on the table, then the second sound of a smaller plate, then the scrape of the plate being turned in proper position.

I continued reading, not looking up from the book. "You know there is only one place in my world where I know the service is this amazing." I paused.

"Nowhere in the city will you find a woman as close to perfect in presenting her offerings and nowhere will you ever find someone who spoils me like you do my dearest Marcie."

I looked up. Goodness she was radiant. She winked and smiled. There was a purposeful pause, I could tell.

"Only for you my dearest. I will be back to check on you." She whispered.

I wanted to say something I wasn't fast enough; she smiled then turned forcing me back to my book. I knew she would do this. I was enjoying the view of my previous lover as she walked away. The sway of her mature hips, the firmness of her legs in those capri pants, the tone of her calves.

She turned her head knowing I was looking. She winked then pointed at my book. She smiled and walked away behind the counter into her office. I returned to my studies.

I flipped page after page then paused taking another note. I reached for the mug, dang it was cold now. In frustration, I pushed the chair back, scraping the floor loudly. I picked up the mug and saucer and walked up front. As I did it seemed every one of the eighteen or so eyes in the cafe were on me. I lowered my head again and just pretended to be a normal customer.

Annalise was busy with customers so I walked behind the counter. I rinsed my mug and grabbed the pot refilling my mug. I added a splash of cream and walked back to my table returning to the life I live, music studies.

I felt her touch my shoulder. I knew this touch. Then I felt her fingers tenderly move across the exposed skin of my neck. I felt her breath on my neck, the warmth and moisture of her breath now permeating the shell was trying to stay intact.

She whispered. "You don't seem okay."

I knew if I turned my head to look at her, I would crumble, I would start to falter, I would cry. My heart was racing faster now and her fingers started massaging the tense muscles at the base of my neck.

She whispered again. "I am not trying to seduce you but if you need a massage just tell me." She kissed my cheek and stood. I murmured as her fingers left my skin. I was suddenly shaken, I missed her kiss, I missed her touch, and I missed loving Marcie.

"Marcie?"

She turned and took a step closer. I held my hand up, I blinked a few times. She ignored me and came to a stop at my side. She crouched down, now at eye level. My lips were quivering.

"Baby its okay I know you are in love I am sorry but I see you straining. Trust me I understand but you love her. I understand." She winked and stood.

She turned and walked back to her office. I went back to studying and finished that mug of coffee. I waited until Annalise stepped around the counter into the back. I quickly packed my books, grabbed my phone, zipped, my backpack closed and snuck out of the café.

I knew I would need to explain myself on Friday why I didn't say goodbye as I showed up for work, but I needed a few moments to myself at this point I thought. As I got home, I settled into my normal evening routine, helping Mom and Momma with dinner and then retreated to my bedroom to study.

It was just before ten thirty when I heard it.

🎶🎶🎶 I don't want to be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips 🎶🎶🎶

I quickly grabbed my phone, it was our special ringtone. I smiled and actually started to tear up. It was my dearest giving me a call. I answered quickly.

"Mich! I am sorry I am stressed, I am worried and I miss you, can you please forgive me?" I rambled quickly. I needed her to know I love her and I was sorry.

"Frances, relax love though we are hundreds of miles apart I know you love me and I love you as well." She paused, "Now why are you stressed?"

"Michaela, I am a horrible woman, I am tempted. I'm sorry." I tapered off and lowered my voice; I was actually ashamed of myself. "I am sorry I love you so much."

I heard her breathing, I could hear her thinking. "What? Michaela, please say something."

"Frances, I know you better than you know yourself. I will be home in mere weeks. And yes, I miss you as well. Frankly dear sister you shouldn't know this but I named my one pillows after you. She, well it, never leaves my side at night. But ..."

There was a pause and she exhaled slowly, "I understand your need for physicality and I understand how much greater it is than mine. I won't like it and I never want to hear about it but you have until I come home, if you

need

release. But I never want to hear about it."

"No! Absolutely not, I will ever cheat on you!" I screamed. "How dare you? I was just talking to you telling you, don't ... ugh!

Goodnight

!"

I disconnected the call and tossed my phone across the bed. I rolled over and broke down into tears, bawling my eyes out missing my lover and girlfriend. I heard my phone ring, I ignored it. Moments later I heard it ring again, I ignored it a second time. I pulled my pillow over my head and just cried.

*****

I heard a knock on my door. I had fallen asleep. I was confused, I was still dressed, and there was another knock. Then the creak of the bottom hinge.

"Baby?"

"Whhaaat?"

"Baby?" I felt my mattress move, she was sitting down. "Frannie, it's seven o'clock."

My mom was gentle and quiet as she touched my shoulder. I buried my head, I was so ashamed.

"Baby, she sent her Momma a text, she is worried about you." She leaned over a bit and kissed my cheek.

"I am fine mom, I am a gawd damn mess but I am fine." I whispered. "The woman I love, I am not supposed to love, is three hundred and seventy some-odd miles away and I will not see her for three more months."

I rolled over and hugged her, "And I miss her so much Mom." I just hugged my mom.

"Sweetie that is no reason to fight with her."

"Mother" my head shot up and I let go of her scooting back on the bed. "She offered me a hall pass mom! A

fucking

hall pass, like I just need sex." I rolled over and out of my bed on the other side. I was fuming now. "She thought it was about sex."

She looked at me and was smiling.

"What?" I barked.

"Well, is it about sex?" She smiled as she asked me.

I screamed, "Eww Mom, enough! Good gawd! Is this whole fucking family nuts? I love her and I miss her, that's all!"

I stood both laughing and crying as I walked to my chest of drawers and grabbed panties, a bra, and made my way out of my room to the shower.

When I got back from my shower she was gone. I threw on a pair of jeans and grabbed the T-shirt. I pulled the books off of my bed. My backpack grabbed my notes from the desk, found my phone and made my way down to the kitchen. I looked at the clock. I was thankful that mom had woken me. I grabbed a banana and a muffin and made my way out of the house to class.

I came home Thursday night after class and hid in my bedroom. I just wasn't in the mood. I had weeks before I would see her and would simply deal with it.

At five-fifteen Friday morning I arrived at Marcie's for work. Woflie was in the back baking; I heard the mixer going and could feel the heat from the oven as I made my way back to clock in. I started a new pot of House Blend to keep him going and get me going. I focused on my opening store tasks. Just before six, I flipped on the lights and busied myself. I poured Wolfie a second cup of coffee and carried it back to him.

"If you weren't so youthful and playing for Marcie's team, I would marry you, my dream girl." Wolfie's Australian accent made my ears perk and my heart swoon.

"Oh Wolfie, if you baked and cooked for me every meal and stripped me naked licking me in my special spots all over it wouldn't matter what team I play for, you could have me forever." I winked and made my way up front.

I heard him yell, "You damn tease." I heard the chime of the door as the first few customers of the day walked in.

The cafe was hopping as the morning turned to afternoon. Students from the college rolled in as did professionals from the local businesses and corporations. It was just past two-fifteen when there was a lull. Marcie asked if after she took a potty break I could meet her in her office. The other barista would handle the counter.

I smiled and of course told her I would see her in her office. I stepped into the customer bathroom and quickly refreshed myself and checked my hair. I walked back to the counter and poured her a coffee and one for me. I put them on trays and walked to her office. I waited outside until she exited the bathroom.

I smiled as she walked the five steps from the bathroom to the door of her office. She smiled and stepped to the side, opening her office door. The sweet aroma of vanilla and roses wafted in the air, it fills my senses and causes a shiver.

As we both enter, Marcie turns and smiles. She pauses and doesn't walk behind her desk. I set the tray of coffee down and turn facing her. Damn it she took a step closer. The aroma is stronger, vanilla and rose thrills me.

Marcie moved forward a tad bit more, this time she has broken the personal space which she previously freely entered when we were lovers. I can feel her breath, my heart is racing.

"Marcie, I can't, I promised her my heart."

Marcie ran her fingers up my arms, teasing my skin as she leaned forward. "I know you are off the market but I miss my amazing lover, I miss the woman who filled my bed and made me dream of things unimaginable."

"I will always love you Marcie but I am truly trying. Why do you tease me so much? I beg you; do not hurt my heart and soul."

She kissed my cheek and let her fingers drop from my arms. I shivered and exhaled. "I love you still Marcie I truly love you but I can't."

"I am sorry to tempt you. I see your foundation of love for Michaela is strong. I am embarrassed for my actions. My physical needs for you are so overwhelming."

I interrupted. "But Annalise?" I watched her frown, her head slightly lowered. "I am sorry, perhaps I will subtly whisper in her ear."

Marcie took a step forward and kissed my cheek, "She is new, hurried and well ... She isn't you, my sweet."

"I shall then 'whisper' in her ear and trust me if my strained heart tears, I will come back, Marcie I will run back to you." I kissed her cheek and pressed my lips a bit firmer to her skin. "I do love you but ... I can't."

*****

November

As the first week of November came to a close, our first eight weeks of the fall semester ended. I was happy with my progress as were my professors and my mentors. The second eight weeks, really only six but we would cram all weeks of class in, which would take us through Christmas, would be a larger challenge. I was starting the Theater courses of my BFA. THEA 101, up first. I would get THEA 200 and 300 credits in my internship. However, this wouldn't be easy.

I had finished my vocal courses but was able to slide into a private piano lesson this semester, of course it was an additional cost but I felt I wanted to get back to my love of playing music as well.

On that Thursday night, the first week, with finals out of the way and a tad bit of relaxation on my schedule; I decided to sit with Mom and Momma after dinner.

I know I am boring! Well yeah I love to be at home with my mothers, I am trying to be a 'good girl'. The evening news had just finished when Momma reached for her phone. She turned to Mom and leaned over and kissed her cheek. She whispered something to her and giggled.

I wasn't really paying attention but Momma got up, slipped on her jacket and walked out the door. "Where is she going?"

Mom just looked at me and shrugged. "Something about ice cream."

I rolled my eyes. "It's November, late fall, early winter and she is getting ice cream. Whatever." I went back to my tablet and the streaming series I was watching.

It wasn't more than forty-five minutes later when Mom got up from her seat and walked into the kitchen. I knew it wasn't more than forty-five minutes because the episode wasn't over yet, I had just started this when Momma left. She came back with her cell phone in hand and a dish of mint chocolate chip ice cream.

I paused the episode and looked at her. She smiled. I removed my earbuds and exhaled. "Alright, what is going on with you two? Would you like to share what is up because it looks like we have plenty of ice cream in the house?"

Mom looked at me straight faced and shrugged her shoulders.

"Mother? I call bullshit on this one."

Her head lowered and her eyes pierced through my soul. "Language young lady!"

"I might be young and only partially through college but Momma only eats mint chocolate chip ice cream. It seems there is plenty in this house. Now spill it."

She smiled. "Nope!" She turned and went back to watching the television.

"Nope?" I huffed" What do you mean nope. That is all I get is NOPE?" I stood. "What is going on you two haven't been talking all night, you two are usually yammering on about ...."

And that is when I heard it. 🎶🎶🎶 I don't wanna be your friend, I wanna kiss your lips, ooh-ooh-ooh 🎶🎶🎶

I looked at her and saw my mother grinning at me out of her peripheral vision; I started crying. My phone continued to ring.

"You might want to answer that baby." She smiled and went back to eating her ice cream.

I grabbed my phone, "Mich?"

"Hey" she whispered.

I heard her voice and immediately started crying. "Where are you?"