2006
Graduation was two weeks ago. Candy and Mae's shared 18th birthday a few months before that. They were ready to step out into the world, but these two couldn't quite let go.
Down by the creek, the world softened. That heat--hellish, wet, clinging--pressed down like a judgment, making everything slow. Dragonflies hung like prayers in the air, wings trembling. Cicadas screamed their lazy agony from the trees, and the sky above split itself into layers of bleached-out blue. The creek ran low, more of a stubborn shimmer now, slipping over stones that had learned to take the sun. The mud smelled alive. The leaves above barely rustled. It was one of those southern days where even God didn't move.
The two of them had wandered off without saying much. Everybody else was back at the house--coolers cracked open, cigarettes burning low, music and laughter and boys who had no clue what they weren't getting. Mae and Candy had gone where it was quieter, where you had to listen to understand anything at all. They sat with their bare legs pressed into the damp grass, knees bent just enough, trying not to look at each other too hard.
Mae--blonde, freckled, sunburnt around the collarbones--wore a white tank top that stuck to her skin. Flat-chested, lean like a boy but with that nervous, electric edge that made her body different now. Her denim shorts rode high, frayed at the edges, pockets threatening to spill out the bottom. Her hair was up, messy and damp, a few strands stuck to her neck. She'd cut it short last fall in what she claimed wasn't a rebellion. Her lips were chapped, bitten. She kept fidgeting with a rock between her fingers, but she wasn't looking at the creek.
Candy had red hair pulled into a thick, wild ponytail, the kind that bounced when she got mad. Her tank top was green, stretched tight across the swell of her chest--more than a handful, always had been, and she knew it. She sat back on her hands, legs open a little too wide, like she didn't care who saw, even if it was just Mae. Her shorts were rolled up higher than necessary. Freckles dotted her thighs, but her eyes were sharp beneath the shade. Watching. Not saying anything yet.
They hadn't talked about it. Not really. Not when Candy kissed her that night on the back porch after graduation and then laughed like it was a joke. Not when Mae didn't laugh. Not when Mae kissed her back two days later, down by the same creek, and then ran off barefoot and trembling.
Now they were here again. Same place. Same fuckin' heat. Same ache that kept getting heavier. Something had to give.
Mae sat cross-legged now, heels pressed into the dirt, staring at the water like it owed her an answer. "You ever think," she said, voice barely above a breath, "we oughta just say it?"
Candy didn't move at first. Just blinked slow, her lashes heavy with heat and the weight of what she knew was coming. Then she laughed--not loud, not cruel, but raw. "Say what, Mae?"
Mae looked at her. Really looked. At Candy's knees all scraped up from somewhere, probably the fence near the back barn. At her hands, sunk into the grass like roots. At her chest, rising slow, falling slower. And her mouth. That mouth. The one that had made a mess of her insides for months now.
"You know what."
Candy didn't smile, not now. Just cocked her head, letting the sun catch in the gold hoops dangling from her ears. Her tank top stuck to her, outlining everything--round breasts pushed up against the fabric, sweat beading in the dip between them. She shifted, just a little, and the cotton pulled tighter.
"Mae." Her voice was quieter now. Serious. "If I say it, we can't go back."
Mae's mouth twisted, unsure if it wanted to smile or cry. "We ain't been back since May," she said. "Not since you kissed me and ran off like I was a damn fire."
Candy licked her lips--nervous, this time. Real. Her thighs tensed, and she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "I didn't run 'cause I didn't want it. I ran 'cause I did."
That hit Mae like a slap. She felt her stomach drop, flutter, turn traitor. The heat wasn't just heat anymore--it was rising, pressing from the inside out, curling around her ribs like a secret.
"I can't keep pretending you don't fuckin' ruin me every time you look at me," Mae whispered. "I can't keep sittin' in the same room as you and pretending I don't wanna crawl into your lap and--"
Candy surged forward. One movement. One breath.
"Then don't."
Mae froze.
Candy was close now. Not touching, but close. One inch and they'd be past the point of no return. One inch and they'd never be "just friends" again. Candy's eyes were wide, like she was daring her to back out. But her hands were fists in the grass. Like she didn't trust herself if she reached.
Mae breathed out slow, then lifted her chin. "Kiss me again," she said. "But this time, mean it."
Candy moved like gravity had given her permission.
And oh, she meant it.
Candy's mouth crashed into hers like it had been waiting all summer--hot and urgent, too much teeth, too much want, and Mae didn't care. Didn't flinch. She opened for her like she'd been aching to, hands grabbing fistfuls of Candy's tank top, pulling until their teeth knocked and their lips smeared. It wasn't perfect. It was messy, desperate, like they might never get the chance again.
Candy pulled back just enough to breathe, her voice a rasp, eyes blown wide. "You taste like river water and bad decisions."
Mae grinned, flushed and trembling. "You like bad decisions."
"Love 'em," Candy growled, and then she was pushing Mae down into the muddy bank, bracing herself with one hand beside Mae's head. Their bodies were too hot, too slick with sweat, skin sticking where it touched. Candy's knee slotted between Mae's thighs and stayed there, not moving--just a weight, a suggestion.
Mae arched, hips twitching. "Shit," she muttered, eyes fluttering. "I've never..."
"I know." Candy's voice was lower now, steadier than Mae felt she had any right to be. "Me neither."
Mae laughed, shaky. "Don't sound like it."
"Fake it 'til you fuck me," Candy murmured, kissing the edge of Mae's jaw, and then her throat, slow and open-mouthed, leaving wet heat in her wake. "Ain't that the saying?"
Mae let her head drop back into the grass, trying not to writhe. "You're such a fuckin' show-off."
"I'm nervous as hell, actually." Candy slid her hand under Mae's tank top. Her palm was hot, shaking a little as it brushed Mae's ribs. "But I've thought about this too many times to stop now."
Mae bit her lip, hard. "You--? Wait. You've thought about it?"
Candy's hand stilled. "Mae. I nearly fall over 'cause of your goddamn collarbones."
That broke something wide open. Mae reached up, grabbed Candy by the sides of her face, and kissed her again--slower this time, deeper. More sure. They shifted together like puzzle pieces finally clicking.
Candy's hand moved higher. Hesitating. Fingers trembling just beneath Mae's nonexistent bra. "Can I...?"
Mae nodded, whispering, "Please," like it hurt.
When Candy's fingers finally touched her, Mae sucked in a breath. Candy didn't grope--she held her. Reverent. Gentle. Thumb grazing the soft, flat plane like it mattered.
Mae nearly cried. "You're not disappointed?"
Candy looked down at her like she was the goddamn sun. "I'm not here for titties, Mae. I'm here for you."
And that--that--made Mae whimper, pulling Candy down until their foreheads pressed together. "I wanna touch you too."
"You can." Candy's voice was thick now. "I--shit--I want you to."
Mae's hand crept under the green tank, found soft, warm weight. She cupped it in her palm, felt the shift of Candy's breath, the sharp intake as her thumb grazed the nipple. It hardened instantly, and Candy groaned, pressing down against Mae's thigh.
"Oh fuck," Candy breathed, voice breaking. "Mae, I'm--this is--Jesus."
Mae giggled, drunk on power and panic both. "You're kinda falling apart."
"I am apart. You did that."
Their hips were grinding now--clumsy, clothed, but more than enough. Candy's denim scraped Mae's thigh, and Mae rolled her hips up to meet her, both of them gasping, sweating, losing any sense of shame.
"God," Candy muttered, "if I come like this I'm never gonna live it down."
