This is a slow-burn f/f romance in five chapters. As such, there are long sections with little sexual activity. I would be reluctant to post it here except that it backstops stories I intend to post in the future. If you continue beyond this warning, I hope you enjoy the story!
Bonds of Friendship
1 - A Friend's Tragedy
"They're good, Erin!" The voice from beside me gave me a start, as I was trying surreptitiously to sniff the contents of a crockpot.
I turned my head to see Krys, the wife of the pastor, and a good friend, her red hair and freckles a welcome sight at this as at any event. She was the organizer of the pot luck lunch, and she'd chosen a perfect day for it.
"Oh, did you bring them?" I asked. "Something around here smells spicy. I wasn't sure if it was..." I lifted the lid all the way off.
"Mmm-hmm," she replied. "They are that. No, Faye brought them."
I did a double-take at her words, and turned further around to see the short brunette behind me. Her face was a little flushed, and the look she gave me seemed mildly embarrassed.
"Faye!" I yelled, dropping the lid back onto the pot and turning to give my friend a hug. She returned it. "I wasn't expecting to see you for another week! Why didn't you call?"
"I wanted to surprise you," she said, releasing me. "I've been so looking forward to seeing you. Krys said you'd be here, so..." she spread her arms wide. "Look at me! Good as new!"
On the surface, she did look like she was doing well. She'd let her hair grow out since the first time we met. Now, lush straight hair fell to a V at the center of her back. Her narrow face was more open than it had been and as friendly as ever. But she was still distressingly thin, and I knew her well enough to see the signs of worry and sadness in her eyes. I tried to keep my tone cheerful for her. "I'm glad to hear it!"
Apparently my doubt was as clear to Faye as her tension was to me. We were too close to deceive each other. She sighed. "Yeah, well, there are still bad days, but they're fewer and further between. Do try the beans, though!"
"I'm so glad to see you," I told her. "You know I'm always happy to help with the bad days, don't you?"
Faye nodded. "Yeah, I do," she said, softly.
I lifted the lid on the pot again, took a paper plate and began to ladle beans onto it. "Just how spicy are we talking about here?" I asked Krys.
"They're wonderful," she replied, "but don't take any for Zoe."
"Oh, is she here?" Faye's face brightened. "I've missed her, too!" She turned to look around, and I waved towards my daughter, sitting with youngsters of other church families. "I won't disturb her with her friends," she said.
"Let me try these spicy death beans," I said, "then you can take her some ice cream."
Krys laughed at that, then smiled at us and excused herself to circulate.
Faye watched her depart, her expression more relaxed than it had been. "She doesn't change, does she?" she murmured to me. "If it hadn't been for knowing she would be here for me, I don't know if I could have come back." She flashed me a grin, craning her neck to meet my eyes, half a head above hers. "You too, of course, Erin."
I returned her grin. "I know what you mean," I said. "She's been there for both of us."
~~~~~
It had been a difficult year. Worse than difficult. I was finally getting my life back together, but Faye - her tragedy dwarfed my drama.
It was almost two years earlier that Krys had asked me to deliver a meal she'd cooked to Faye and her husband, Doug. It was a generous gift of her time, but it wasn't without calculation. I'm sure that she knew that when I spent some time with them I'd also want to help. Krys looked after the whole congregation, and recruited us, generally with great subtlety, to help each other.
Before the meal delivery, I'd known Doug and Faye to say hello to at church, but no more. Faye was a local girl, but she'd moved out of state for college, where she'd met Doug. They married right after graduating, then Doug had followed Faye across the country when she returned home to work.
Doug found a job in the area, and had just started working when he contracted mono. I've learned that this is usually a mild disease; most of us have had it, developed antibodies and thrown it off without even knowing, and even those who become aware of it usually suffer no more than minor aches for a short while.
Occasionally, though, it's debilitating. Doug was under a lot of stress; he and Faye both had student debt, expenses from the wedding, his move, setting up their apartment, and such. That might have contributed, or it might not. Sometimes mono just is that severe, even to a healthy immune system, according to his doctors.
So Doug lost his job and was confined to bed, feeling guilty and stressed because Faye was looking after him
and
working overtime to make ends meet. Krys's occasional donation of a home-cooked meal was a blessing for both of them.
And, as I suspect Krys intended, when I saw how much help they needed, I added my own contributions. I was feeding three, including a toddler, and making two extra portions wasn't hard. Faye and Doug were close enough to my age, twenty-three to my twenty-five at the time, and I enjoyed spending time with them, seeing the affection between them - joy that had left my marriage well before Zoe was born - and I liked to feel useful.
That's where my own troubles started, or at least began to come to a head. Jared, my husband, Zoe's father, was jealous of the time I spent with them. He refused to look after Zoe when I visited my friends, and I had to rely on my mother for babysitting. He became increasingly irrational, making snide remarks about how Doug must have acquired mono (there's a reason it's called the kissing disease, though there are plenty of other ways to catch it), and implying I was either having an affair with Doug or planning to. Which was not only insulting to both of us, it was ridiculous, given that he could barely get to his feet on most days.
I wasn't prepared to give up seeing my friends completely, and Jared wouldn't compromise; for him, I needed to be at home with no social life. He wouldn't agree to counselling, and at about the time that Doug began to recover from his illness, Jared left me and filed for divorce. I'm pretty sure that he'd been having an affair. He'd taken advantage of me being so busy that I missed the signs, and then used my absences as a justification for leaving me, but it was an excuse. He'd have left anyway. I was sure of that.
Things hadn't been good between us since I'd gotten pregnant, and wouldn't consider an abortion. He'd said we were too young, and we weren't ready to start a family, never mind that he'd said different when he'd pressured me into having unprotected sex. I had a decent income and a little money of my own, and we could afford a child. I realized I couldn't trust him to take responsibility, but I stood firm in my decision.
Perhaps if I'd been less tied up with Doug and Faye, with looking after Zoe and dealing with Jared's hostility, I might have seen the separation coming. I can't be
absolutely, one hundred percent
sure that he was having an affair, but the speed with which he moved in with someone else seems like a clue after the fact. So then I was dealing with the divorce. Getting Jared completely out of Zoe's life cost me his financial support, but it was worth it.
If that had been as far as everything progressed, my troubles would have meant an unpleasant year for me, but at least I'd have been able to feel that I'd helped Faye and Doug in a time of need. And as my troubles continued, while Doug finally threw off the infection, Faye said that she was looking forward to being able to give me some support in my dark times. It made my situation more bearable, and I felt at home with them. Often I'd take Zoe with me. She always liked to see "Ahfay" and "Undog", which was her rendition of Auntie Faye and Uncle Doug.
But there's another thing that I've learned about the virus that causes mono. Sometimes it triggers other problems. A couple of months after Doug felt he was almost fully recovered, the fatigue returned. But this time it wasn't mono. It was lymphoma. My mother acted as my unpaid babysitter for months as I stayed with Faye through Doug's treatment, while still working and spending time dealing with the divorce court.
Doug didn't make it to his second wedding anniversary. I held Faye through the funeral, and kept her together afterwards. Zoe helped, when she was around. Now three, she treated "sad Afaye" very seriously, holding her hand when she cried.
Necessities of life kept Faye more-or-less functional. She had bills to pay, and a job she - fortunately - didn't hate, giving her some grounding. I helped her try to put herself back together. She was grateful for that, but tired beyond reason. Her company's HR department was aware of her situation, and offered her extended leave, which she eventually took, travelling north to stay with her family. I hadn't seen her since she'd left, though we'd traded emails, and I knew she was heading back soon. I'd missed her.
~~~~~
The beans were as spicy as advertised, and very tasty. They went well with the slow-cooked barbecue pork that was the pastor's contribution, and my own potato salad. I studied my friend as she ate. She seemed shy. She'd been withdrawn from her friends for so long, I guessed. But she was clearly doing much better. She'd put a lot of effort into the subtle makeup tones, accenting her rich brown eyes, and her lips had just a touch of gloss. Her open shoulder lemon dress was low enough at the neck and high enough at the knee that it would have been out of place in a more conservative congregation than ours, but was gorgeous in the April sun.
