Beyond the Palace

Beyond the Palace

by Davina Lee

*

Author's Note

The previous chapter brought some closure to the mystery surrounding Matoaka's bout of amnesia.

Like the other girls who were recently rescued, Matoaka was given a choice: to heal, or to forget. She chose to forget. Why, we don't know. But now, after witnessing the new girls beginning their healing journey, Matoaka has changed her mind. She too wants to heal.

But how has she chosen to embark on her own healing path? Grandmother and the medicine woman offered their help guiding her in the process, but knowing Matoaka as we do, is it possible she might have chosen another option?

Let's find out. But first, a few definitions...

Hakama -- The wide-legged pants worn by the shrine maidens, like Chihiro, and also the bottom half of some martial arts uniforms.

Keikogi -- The name of the training robe worn in some styles of martial arts.

Obi -- The belt that holds everything closed and in place.

* * *

Chapter 6: So It Begins

"Again!" commanded the woman standing aside Matoaka. The woman's black

keikogi

was tied at her waist, and her matching black

hakama

extended to her bare feet.

Matoaka, dressed similarly but in white, hoisted her staff to hip level. With one hand gripping the wooden shaft in front of her body and the other gripping behind, Matoaka tensed. She bent her knee, propelling herself forward with her back leg, while simultaneously thrusting forward with both arms.

"Again!"

Matoaka stepped back and once again took a lunge at the straw bundle propped up with sticks in front of her. She jabbed her staff into the target. Droplets of perspiration sparkled on Matoaka's brow as the mid-morning sun cast across her skin.

"Much improved, Matoaka-san," said the instructor, clad in black. "We may well make a warrior of you yet."

"Thank you, sensei," replied Matoaka, dipping her head and delivering her words between sucking great gulps of air into her lungs.

"But straw dummies don't fight back." The woman in black lashed out with her hand, taking Matoaka by the lapel of her

keikogi

. Giving a sudden tug, the instructor caused Matoaka to stumble and nearly loose her footing. Matoaka managed to stay upright, but leaned precariously.

"Your attack puts you off balance. Always come back to a defensible position. Like this," said the woman in black. Still holding Matoaka by the lapel, the instructor helped her back to standing. She used her other hand to reposition Matoaka's hips.

"Yes, sensei." Matoaka's cheeks reddened as she fidgeted in her new stance.

The instructor moved down the line to the next girl in white

hakama

and matching

keikogi

. "Again!" she commanded.

The young women in white lashed out with their staffs. Matoaka lunged forward as well, propelling the tip of her staff into the bundle of straw. Immediately after, she took up a defensive crouch.

The woman in black paced up and down the line. "Again!"

* * *

"I don't think this is what your grandmother had in mind when she spoke about choosing to heal," said Chihiro, holding a cup of water toward Matoaka. All down the line of seven other girls in white

keikogi

were seven shrine maidens, each holding out a similar drink of water and offering words of encouragement.

Chihiro held out a towel that Matoaka used to wipe the perspiration from her face and neck. The other girls in their training robes were doing the same. Matoaka was the only one in the group descended from The People.

"I don't think so either," said Matoaka, taking a sip at her cup. "But she'll understand my choice as I get stronger."

"I hope so, Matoka-chan. I don't think she's very happy with me either, for bringing you here."

Matoaka took another gulp of water and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. She laid her towel over her shoulder and turned to Chihiro. "No," she said. "I don't imagine she is. But I appreciate you bringing me here and showing your faith in me."

"I'm your shrine maiden. I'll follow you anywhere. It's her you need to convince." Chihiro lowered her voice and tilted her head toward the black-clad instructor as she said this.

"I'll get stronger," said Matoaka. "I have to. I've seen the tears on the faces of the girls who come to us from The Palace. The girls at the stream with their wolf mothers. And now I know that's where I came from too. And that my first choice was to forget."

Chihiro laid her hand on Matoaka's forearm. "You've only been here three days. You needn't push yourself so much."

Matoaka shook her head. "Whatever it is about The Palace that caused those girls to weep, and me to want to hide my own memories away from myself, it can't be good. So I have to get stronger. I have to train harder. I have to learn to fight. Because no girl should ever need to make a choice between healing or forgetting."

"Matoaka-chan." Chihiro gave Matoaka's forearm a gentle squeeze.

"Matoaka-san," said the black-clad instructor, as she strode over with another white-robed young woman trailing behind.

"Sensei," replied Matoaka, bowing.

"This is Rei," said the instructor.

Matoaka turned her gaze to the young woman beside the instructor, her brow glistening with beads of sweat, who said nothing and barely looked up.

"For the rest of the day, Rei is your sparring partner. She will teach you to fight. You will teach her to speak."

"She does not speak, sensei?" asked Matoaka.

"She does not speak your language. The language of The People."

"I understand," said Matoaka.

"Rei has joined us only recently, but has proven herself to learn quickly."

"

Konnichiwa

," said Rei, bowing, and still not quite meeting Matoaka's gaze. "Hello?" she added.

"Hello. I'm Matoaka." Matoaka turned the fingers of her right hand toward the center of her chest as she said this. "Matoaka."

"Rei," said Rei, mimicking the same gesture.

"I came here with Chihiro," said Matoaka. "You know Chihiro?"

"Ah, Chihiro!" Rei nodded vigorously, and managed to raise her eyes a bit more to meet Matoaka's before stealing a quick glance at Chihiro and then looking again to her feet.

"I'll let you two get acquainted," said the instructor, turning to stride down the line to pair up another two young women in white robes.

As the two young women stood staring in silence, neither quite looking at the other, Chihiro excused herself and wandered off to join the other shrine maidens.

"Matoaka." Matoaka glanced at Rei while repeating her earlier gesture of turning her fingers inward to point to herself.

"Rei," said Rei, bowing.

Then, in a blur of motion, Rei brought her staff up into both hands and lunged at Matoaka.

"Hey!" Matoaka jumped back. "I wasn't ready. You could have told me we were--"

Rei pulled back and lunged again, cutting Matoaka's words off mid-stream.

"Do you not understand--?"

Rei pushed forward, leading with the point of her staff.

"Hey! Slow down!"

* * *

"Matoaka-chan! How was your training?" asked Chihiro, as Matoaka slid the door open on the room they shared and dragged herself inside.

"Ugh. Exhausting!" bemoaned Matoaka, as she loosened her

obi

and cast it to the floor, letting her robe fall open. Her bare chest radiated pink and glistened with perspiration.

Chihiro stepped over to snatch Matoaka's discarded

obi

from the floor and began to fold it.

"Rei is relentless," continued Matoaka.

"She hasn't been with us long, but Rei is a naturally skilled fighter. Very strong. And very smart."

"And then there's the language barrier," said Matoaka. "It makes it harder to let her know when I need her to ease off. But I suppose that's okay. She makes me train harder. Still though, I'm wiped out."

Chihiro knelt to set Matoaka's discarded

obi

aside and then moved to stand behind her. Wrapping her arms low around Matoaka's waist, Chihiro touched her lips to the back of Matoaka's neck.

"Mmm," mumbled Matoaka.

"You taste salty," whispered Chihiro.

Matoaka whipped her head around. "Did you miss the part where I said Rei doesn't back off? I'm a sweaty mess."

Chihiro extended her tongue as she lowered her lips again. When she finally lifted her head, she chuckled. "And with the language barrier, did Rei not know how to lead you to the baths?"

"Rei's supposed to bathe me?"

Chihiro shrugged. "Perhaps she's saving your sweaty, worn out body for me."

Matoaka turned the corners of her mouth down and rolled her eyes. "You enjoy that sort of thing, do you?"

Chihiro smirked. "I'll enjoy getting you clean. I know that much."

Matoaka paused, gazing into Chihiro's eyes, as she let her mouth straighten and then tick upward at the corners. "I think I'd enjoy that, too."

"I told you Rei is smart. I'll have to thank her for leaving your sweaty self to me." Chihiro grinned as she reached out to take Matoaka's hand in hers.

"You like sweaty girls?"

"I like you," said Chihiro. "Now come on."

* * *

Matoaka leaned back, resting her head against Chihiro's shoulder as Chihiro broke the surface of the bathwater with a cloth in her hand. She dragged the cloth over the top of Matoaka's chest, starting from her left shoulder and ending at her right, before plunging the cloth under the water again.

Matoaka sighed. "Thank you," she said. "I feel so much better."

"You smell better too," said Chihiro.

Matoaka responded by jabbing her right elbow into Chihiro's side. "I take back my earlier thank you."

Behind Matoaka, Chihiro grinned as she leaned forward to press her lips to the top of Matoaka's head.

"You kiss me like Grandmother kisses me," said Matoaka, gathering her wet hair into one hand and pulling it forward to expose her neck on the opposite side. "Can't you pretend you're my girlfriend?"

"I am your girlfriend," replied Chihiro.

"Then stop kissing me like my grandmother."

Chihiro's chuckle caused the bathwater to ripple momentarily. She wrapped her arms around Matoaka from behind, gripping the washcloth in both hands to lock Matoaka in.

Matoaka snuggled in as she let a small moan escape.

Holding Matoaka fast, Chihiro canted her head to place her mouth just below Matoaka's left ear lobe. Chihiro paused a moment to inhale a breath.

Matoaka shivered as Chihiro hovered there.

Chihiro pressed her lips to Matoaka's neck and Matoaka exhaled in a slow, shuddering sigh.

"Better?" asked Chihiro.

"Mmm..." was all Matoaka managed to form as a response.

"I should ask Rei to spar with you every day," said Chihiro, loosening her grip on Matoaka. "It makes you very... compliant."

"Chihiro?"

"Matoaka?"

Matoaka turned to face Chihiro. Her brow was knit. "When did I lose your language? Was it when I chose to forget?"

"Lose my language?" Chihiro cocked her head.

"You always speak to me in mine. As does sensei and everyone else here. But I... I don't understand you. I don't understand Rei, or anyone else. Only when you're speaking my language do I understand."

Chihiro reached out to touch her hand to Matoaka's hair and trail her fingers over and through a handful of dark wet strands.

Matoaka pressed her lips together and turned her eyes to the ceiling for a moment. "Actually," said Matoaka, "Rei's language seems to be throttling me with that staff of hers and tossing me on the ground. I guess I understand that well enough."

Chihiro chuckled.

"But I can't seem to remember your language."

Chihiro shook her head. "You never knew it. A few words here and there, I suppose. But you never really knew it. I've always communicated with you in your language."

Matoaka lowered her eyes. "And for that, I am sorry," she said. "I would like you to teach me."

"Matoaka-chan..."

"It's not right. Everyone going out of their way to accommodate me. I want to learn. I should learn. I don't want to be a burden."

"Matoaka-chan. Slow down," said Chihiro, touching her fingertips to Matoaka's cheek. "You're not a burden. And you don't have to do everything at once."

Matoaka reached up to lay her hand over Chihiro's, closing Chihiro's hand around her cheek and nuzzling against her. "Please?"

"

Aishitemasu

," said Chihiro.

"Eye... Eesh..." said Matoaka.

"

Aishitemasu

," repeated Chihiro. "It means I love you."

Matoaka smiled. "Ah-eesh-teh-mas."

"

Taoru

," said Chihiro next.

"

Taoru

," repeated Matoaka. "What does that mean?"

"Towel," said Chihiro. "As in, you need one. Any longer in the bath and you'll turn into a

purūn

. A prune."

Matoaka's smile grew. "Thank you," she said. "Thank you for teaching me."

Chihiro wiggled out from behind Matoaka and stood up in the bath. She turned to reach for a towel. "Promise me you'll still let me take care of you. You don't have to do everything for yourself."

Matoaka nodded.

"And you don't have to do it all at once."

Matoaka stood up to join Chihiro and leaned into the towel Chihiro offered. Matoaka wrapped her arms around Chihiro and squeezed.

* * *

"Did you get enough to eat?" asked Chihiro.

Matoaka nodded.

"Would you like to go exploring? It's a lovely night for it."

Matoaka shook her head, then after a brief moment of fighting it, Matoaka let her mouth go wide with a yawn. "Sorry," mumbled Matoaka.

"Come," said Chihiro, holding her hand out to Matoaka.

Hand in hand, the two walked back to the room they shared. Chihiro left Matoaka only long enough to unroll the futon across the floor and arrange the pillows and blankets. She stood up to join Matoaka once again.

"We can rest for a bit and then go out to look at the stars later," said Chihiro, as she loosened the

obi

holding her robe closed. "It should be a clear night tonight."

Matoaka stifled another yawn.

"Or if you're not up for it, we can call an early bedtime. You've had a busy day."

Matoaka watched Chihiro's movements as Chihiro folded her

obi

and set it aside.

Matoaka pushed her hands forward into the gap of Chihiro's robe. Starting at Chihiro's hips and moving upward to Chihiro's shoulders, Matoaka widened the gap until Chihiro's robe fell from her shoulders and dangled about her arms.

"Chihiro, my dutiful shrine maiden," whispered Matoaka, as she traced out the line of Chihiro's arm with a single fingertip. "Maybe one day I'll have muscles like yours. But even then, I think I will always feel safest in your embrace."

Matoaka let her fingers trail down Chihiro's forearm, watching with her eyes as the gooseflesh appeared. She stopped when she reached Chihiro's hand and dragged it over to rest atop her own

obi

.

Chihiro grinned and began to pick at the belt with her fingers, freeing it from Matoaka's waist.

"What was that word again," mused Matoaka, as Chihiro touched her hand to the bare skin of Matoaka's stomach. "Ah-eesh-teh-mas."

"

Aishitemasu

," said Chihiro. "It means--"

"I know what it means," said Matoaka, shrugging out of her

keikogi

.

"Then you know I mean it when I say it," said Chihiro. "I will always stay by your side. I will keep you safe. I am your shrine maiden and--"

Chihiro did not get a chance to finish. Her words were cut off by Matoaka mashing her lips against Chihiro's mouth and squeezing her tight enough to push most of the air from Chihiro's lungs.

As their remaining clothing fell to their feet, the pair tumbled atop the futon, arms and legs tangled together, pausing just long enough to pull up a single blanket against the night's chill.

* * *

Afterword

So our dear sweet Matoaka is done with forgetting and has decided her path in life is to train as a fighter. She's learning the art from the other women in Chihiro's clan who seem to be part of a militant wing of the shrine maidens. Maybe not quite what Grandmother had in mind when she spoke of healing, but Matoaka seems to be confident in her choice. And with her shrine maiden Chihiro at her side, Matoaka will be okay... won't she?

Find out in the next chapter.

As the ending credits roll, use your favorite streaming service to play

Take Me Down

by The Pretty Reckless.